Okay, as a parent, I am questioning a few things. My daughter received her first outright rejection after an on-campus audition. Small school, Less Intensive (so was assumed). We saw a show and could attest that the upperclassman were good, freshman struggled.
So my daughter received an email that stated “the faculty collectively felt you are not quite ready for the demands of the program” Can anyone shed some light on this for me. It did not address anything artistically (vocal, monologue), etc. As parents were are just trying to help our daughter understand. We have a coach and will be speaking to them, however, I thought I would just put this out to see if any other S or D have experienced this type of wording.
@StewNChelle - hugs to you and your D- the 1st no is so hard, esp early in the process. As for the wording… was there anything in the email that made it seem specific to your kid? It may be their form letter and “not up to…” may be their platitude of choice.
In reading threads for several years now, I have seen many posts where programs have sent poorly worded (to,the point of near cruelty) letters. Chin up- keep moving- it wasn’t the right place for your kid… she will find her place
@StewNChelle I honestly would not pay any attention to the wording of what is likely a form letter that provides the same response to any applicant they don’t accept. Believe me, there was some discussion on the MT Board last year about the crappy verbiage in some of these letters. I remember one Mom who shared a letter her daughter received that in essence said the applicant didn’t display the talent necessary or some garbage like that. Here is the bottom line - they have absolutely no way of knowing if your daughter is “ready for the demands of the program” after spending the brief time they provide in an audition setting. For whatever reason, she wasn’t deemed a fit for their particular program and while it is the first rejection, given the ultra competitive nature of this process it likely won’t be the last. If you try to figure out the whats, wheres and whys it will make you crazy. Better to just let it roll off and move on to the next audition without trying to overthink or start trying to change things up in her repertoire now. Definitely review the plan with her coach and make sure she feels super confident with her material, but don’t try to read much from this response. It hurts and is the most unpleasant part of this process, but it makes the yeses all the sweeter when they come - and they will come! Just keep on going and know that you are in good company navigating this sometimes painful course.
My D stopped reading them after about the 5th one! They figure out a way to let it roll off their backs and they move on. Don’t give it a second thought.
Seriously, they should just say “unfortunately we are not able to offer you a place in our program at this time, and we wish you all the best in your college search.” Done. No reason to be hurtful and insulting in a form letter, for heaven’s sake!
I’m preparing for the future rejections, and kid and I discussed that there’s things out of our control, such as gender balance, and “types” (hey, we already accepted too many comedic/leading/diversity/etc). We are just going to credit the “out of control” factors. Easier said than done when the cover letter is poorly written. Big hug, and good luck!
I’d like to add one more point - my guess is that the person in charge of the program drafted that form letter, given the choice of the words, I think it reveals the tone of the program. This is where knowing your kid is important. So many schools at a NACAC college fair came across as elitist/snobbish, it really turned kid off to those schools.
Great replies…I will add one thing that was indicated in the letter that makes it confusing…right after indicating that “unfortunately we are not able to offer you a place in our program at this time, and we wish you all the best in your college search”, it says that if you wish to reaudition later (i.e. at another audition period, they mentioned this during a Q/A session before) and if is still your number one choice, then please do…SO…they are offering to reaudition but already indicated “the faculty collectively felt you are not quite ready for the demands of the program”…this is really confusing and frustrating part…And yes, @DoingResearch, we have had “the talk” about rejections…and that it will happen more than we really want…
The faculty at these schools need to take a hard look at their rejection letters. They can certainly do better (and some are really, really good at it - like “we could fill our classes 20 times with all the talent we see but, unfortunately, we have can only choose XX”). That’s a nice let down but is still a redirection! We’ve talked over and over about rejection/redirection but it doesn’t make it sting any less.
@StewNChelle Well, of course they imagine that every student will want to try again, because that school is so awesome, the program and teachers so incredible, isn’t every rejection letter going to cause the prospective student to pine away, longing for one more try? In italics…Student clutches heart, and drops to floor in despair. I’ve bookmarked this article, just to be prepared to bust it out. https://www.glamour.com/story/emmy-nominee-samira-wiley-rejected-theater-schools
Oh definitely. My D had a similarly strongly worded rejection from what we (at the time) thought was an “ok” school. And then they recommended their several thousand $ summer workshop, where doubtless she would be cured of her deficiencies, or at least their wallets would be cured of theirs…
And there were top-tier schools that rejected her kindly, and so-called lower tier ones that were kind as well… I do echo the sentiments of Doinresearch - is a program that conducts itself that way, really a school she would want to attend?
Listen, it won’t be the last rejection. The important thing is, your D will keep her head up, and eventually get an enthusiastic acceptance letter that will make all the rejections seem like a distant dream.
@StewNChelle I’m new at posting but have been reading these threads for over a year now. I have realized that sometimes they are looking for a “fit” meaning they may already have enough girls or the type that your D fit in and she could’ve been AMAZING and it doesn’t matter. I also found out that there were several that may have been rejected from smaller/ less than stellar schools but were accepted to Juilliard and Tisch School of the Arts. Sometimes they are looking to fill a group of specific types. Has nothing to do with your daughters amazing qualities. I have forewarned my child that the rejection letters will probably top acceptances and they may have already accepted his type and needs to look for someone else to fit their group (or whatever they have in their head) Hope this helps
The letter is crummy, but maybe they are saying that she needs a little more practice, growth, experience or whatever. I am generally very cynical, but this letter seems a bit different than saying that you aren’t RIGHT for the program.
I remember how crummy I felt when I got rejected by law schools that accepted people I didn’t think were as good a student as I was. It HURT then and the memory still hurts. However, I got into a school that I wound up loving, where I met the man who has been my partner in life for almost 30 years and where I wound up getting an education that has allowed me to support my family.
Bottom line, there is a school for your child where s/he will thrive and learn. In the fullness of time, you will put these rejections where they belong - in the trash can of memory.