Maybe not most, but, at least in NYC, some do--and far more use them to get business. Some NYCers use private schools the way people in affluent suburbia use country clubs and golf clubs---for networking. There are stock brokers, insurance agents, interior designers, attorneys, and many others who earn far more than their kid's tuition each year in business derived from other parents whose kids attend the same schools and/or whom they met through the private school "network".
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<p>What's weird is that on Friday, my government teacher (an ex corporate lawyer) was talking about why people go to Stuy, Andover, Exeter, Choate etc. For social networking, not for the parents but for the kids. He said there was no doubt that many of us will lead on to be influential people and influential people needed business from other influential people. And by going to school together, and growing up together, we'd have connections.</p>
<p>One of the things I have found with my d in public school is the bright kids often really aren't challenged ... sometimes they are almost ignored ... especially if they are well behaved. There is a lot of attention paid to the kids who need extra help to get them out of the 1s and 2s in the standardized test. If a child gets 3s and 4s, the school is happy. My daughter has only been challenged in her advanced math classes. Her kindergarten teacher complained to me that she wouldn't come up and learn the alphabet with the rest of the class. She just sat in the back of the room reading! We did switch school districts (moved) in the middle of that year to one of the better districts in our area. </p>
<p>For high school, she will be attending a private girl's school. While our public high school is good and she would have opportunities to take AP classes starting in 9th grade, she wanted the all girls experience, the small classes, the more diverse student body, the international students ... Plus, 100 percent of the kids go on to four-year colleges, unlike the public school.</p>
<p>We are very lucky and she managed to get a grant that will cover most of the costs. I will manage the rest. </p>
<p>Her cousins are among those who attend those private NYC day schools that cost more than Harvard. My stepsister and her husband have the money to pay for it. Like they've paid for nannies, and summer camp where the kids are away for two months without seeing their family... It's a very different lifestyle.</p>
<p>My D goes to a NYC specialized HS. If she didn't get in, she probably would have gone to our local public HS and been in their honors program. Some kids will succeed no matter where they are. I don't have the kind of money these privates require and I'd rather put what I do have towards college. It IS possible to go to a top college even from a regular public HS.</p>
<p>yeah, although you can send mail to brooklyn, ny, bronx, ny, and jackson heights, ny (and it's all new york city! :P)</p>
<p>i go to a specialized public high school... my zoned high school's SAT averages are in the 700-800ish range (that's math plus verbal). sure, i'd be crazy successful there, but it'd make me miserable.....</p>
<p>Also, private schools cater to your needs a lot better. They have amazing learning disability policies, commitees, etc that take care of extra time, etc. Many of my friends with learning disabilitiies such as ADD are moving on to Ivies. In public school, these type of kids, esp. those with ADHD, for example, are very often ignored, punished or put in special ed, etc.</p>
<p>truthfully, you rich people who send your kids to these elite expensive schools make me sick. what a waste of money.
I went to a private school for a term and found that the kids there were disgustingly sheltered and clueless about the world.
I also have been to a wide variety of public schools, and I have been exposed to drugs, alcohol, sex, depression, suicide and many other real life issues (although I chose not to take part in them), and learnt an incredible amount about the real world, which, I am afraid, your children will never learn in an elite private school. good luck getting them to live on their own in college as independent, capable human beings.</p>
<p>I also have been to a wide variety of public schools, and I have been exposed to drugs, alcohol, sex, depression, suicide and many other real life issues (although I chose not to take part in them)</p>
<p>This doesn't make sense- you chose not to take part in them?
kids are kids whether they attend private schools or public schools.
A magic genie doesn't take all the heartache away at the door when you sign a check. If it did, I expect many of us would be the first ones to clamor for private schools.
My eldest attended private schools for several reasons.
One the public schools had already stated to us that they were not able to accomodate her combination of giftedness and learning disabilties
being a blue collar family , we did not consider private school until the kindergarten teacher at the local school suggested it because of her academic advances.
Two, our family has several serious concerns, which I will not go into, we did not have outside support from either of our families, and private school gave our daughter a strong foundation which she would not have recieved otherwise.
We couldnt get financial aid to get our cars fixed, repair our house or go on vacation, but we could get aid to send her to a good school.
Just in her very small class of 18, she had several friends whose parents divorced while they were growing up, she had a friend with cancer, one whose father died shortly before graduation, students with substance problems, students with learning problems which required them to work three times as hard as everyone else....
Her classmates went on to teach school on an island where they had to live on rice and canned ham that they scraped the maggots off of that was sent to them after typhoons destroyed their fishing habitat. They joined the military, went to teach in schools with high homeless population, started prgrams for street kids in Brazil, have radio shows on NPR, came back to the school to teach history.....
I dont see those things as being removed from "real life". They are all participating in real life just as well as a public school graduate.
I don't know what problems you experienced in the private school that you tried out, it could be that a few months wasn't long enough time to get accepted into a school where some may have been going for years.
My D private school very rarely allowed anyone to begin junior year or later, one girl did join in her junior year, but she was an exception, and was socially and emotionally mature as well as being a strong student.
I think parents try and find the best fit for their kids as they can, whether that is a private or public school.
I don't think they can be faulted for that- our instinct is to take care of our own first. My younger daughter attends an inner city public school currently, but it has been a struggle to get her an appropriate education, way more time and energy than I expected. We are also still spending a lot of money, becuase she needs to have tutoring to supplant classroom instruction. I expect she would have done a lot better, if she had attended a private school with classrooms half the size, and teachers with a 1/3 of the classloads.</p>
<p>I think that many concerned parents who have children in school in a city where homicide and rape rates are high, and where violence in schools is a daily reality, would be happy to opt out and send their children to a private or religious school. It would be safer and there is a greater emphasis on learning than on activities that lead to 13-18 year-olds getting pregnant, selling drugs, getting shot or dropping out. </p>
<p>This is reality in many American cities. Lots of parents who are working- poor scrape together money for parochial schools (when the schools are not being closed due to lack of funding). I would guess that Seattle is in a bit of a bubble next to DC, Detroit, Cleveland, etc. And yes, there are always exceptions and magnet schools, but remember that the HS drop-out rate in many US cities is up to 50%. This does not promote an atmosphere of learning in many schools.</p>
<p>As to just being able to ignore the drugs, violence, and other problems in many large, inner city schools, it's nice to say that everyone has control over this, but wait until you are in way of a fight, or being tormented for trying too hard in school.</p>
<p>Not to say that one cannot succeed in a tough environment, but given a choice, I suspect that many parents in cities would happily opt out if they could afford it, or if offered a scholarship. Why is it wrong to do that if someone can afford it?</p>
<p>Actually in Seattle we have 1/4 to 1/3 of students in the city attending private schools- one of the higher rates in the country I think. I don't know if that includes those who are homeschooled- don't think so.
We had the decision to either move to the suburbs where the schools were "better" or to stay put and wing it.
It was really tough decision, I didn't like growing up in the suburbs, but we could have had a larger house, schools would have been much more affordable, but we opted to stay put.</p>
<p>every family has to make their own decisions, and while I am not too thrilled with vouchers for what I have heard about them, because it has been my expereince that if a private school values economic diversity they will already have a scholarship program in place, I have changed my mind about charters, and would welcome a system that allowed teachers and parents to have more say in the types of schools they work and send their kids to, without having to go outside the system and choose private.</p>
<p>In some cities, the higher-priced private schools have not participated in the voucher programs, because the amounts are too low, and they want to keep their admissions policies. These schools do tend to have scholarship programs. Many voucher programs have students utilize the lower-priced parochial schools, leading to the whole church-state debate.</p>
<p>The problem I have with charter schools is their uneveness, and lack of accountability. Although some are very good, I have seen several scandals involving charter schools that are mismanaging funds and/or teaching students without appropriate resources or teacher training.</p>
<p>We lived in an area with very low-performing schools, and for various reasons, decided to stay there. My children benefited enormously from private schools on both academic and spiritual levels. I don't believe this would have happened in our troubled private schools. Their education is what I worked for, while paying an enormous tax burden for the public schools. </p>
<p>The recent stabbing death at what would have been their designated public school was one of the many things that reinforced that what I did was right. I am grateful we had a choice.</p>
<p>Speaking as someone who is a senior at Bronx Science (one of the better known NYC magnet schools) with sisters at one elite private schools, I think folks are overlooking several key differences between them. </p>
<p>For those whose interests tend towards classics, arts, etc, or who may need teachers to keep track of whether they're doing their work, or some other details that escape me at the moment, then private schools are a better experience. Shorter school days and less politics between administration, teachers, and students doesn't hurt. Oh and clubs are held during the school day and not after school when one has less energy.</p>
<p>For those who want to be in an evironment which is pretty competive with regards to more analytic interests such as doing research, science or mathematics, the specialized schools win hands down. Again there are other differences, such a wider array of folks, a less sucky social environment than private schools for some (such as me). The real weaknesses are that all school related activities are after school, and that there is an at times frustrating amount of social fragmentation that may result in a less active and satisfactory high school social life.</p>
<p>I've had a fantastic experience at Bronx Science, done my own thing, on my way become very good at theoretical Computer Science research, and I've gotten into at least two really fantastic universities (the one near Palo Alto, California and the one in New Haven, Conn).</p>
<p>"For those who want to be in an evironment which is pretty competive with regards to more analytic interests such as doing research, science or mathematics, the specialized schools win hands down."</p>
<p>I think you're forgetting about Hunter and Townsend Harris. Neither is science high school. In NYC, even the humanities/social science geared kids have good options. For the artsy kids, the top track at LaGuardia can be a good option too. I've known LaGuardia kids who went on to Yale, Mt. Holyoke, and Haverford, among others. </p>
<p>There are some good neighborhood high schools, e.g., Midwood, and some "second tier" magnets that are quite good, e.g., Staten Island Tech and Baruch College H.S. </p>
<p>Nevertheless, I admit that I'd opt for private if I lived in a section of the city with a less than stellar zoned school and my kids didn't get into one of the magnet publics. However, while SOME parents DO pick private high schools over Hunter, Stuy, Townsend Harris, etc., for academic reasons, I think the majority who make that choice do it for non-academic reasons. In SOME --not all--of the latter cases, the reasons DO have to do with social climbing and/or business networking.</p>
<p>There are some magnet programs in our county that were unusually good, and one that is comparable to Bronx Science. Very hard to get into. In Detroit, there is Cass Tech, which is nationally known.</p>
<p>However, to compare the average HS in the cities of Detroit, Cleveland, Washington, DC, and Pittsburgh (just examples) to a place like Bronx Science is not a fair comparison. Of course every city has its exceptions. But I think that given the choice between schools where there is violence on a regular basis (and I am speaking of stabbing and gunshot wounds/deaths) a concerned parent who could, would move or opt out. For others that leaves charter schools, parochial schools (which tend to be less expensive than a lot of private schools) or no choice at all but to try to succeed in a difficult environment. Looking at drop-out rates, teen pregnancies and high failure rates in inner-city high schools doesn't leave much doubt that there are real problems. Not referring to Bronx Science or those types of programs. Try the average HS in the S. Bronx or the poorer areas of Brooklyn. then come back and say that the parents who can afford it should not move to the suburbs or pay for private school.</p>
<p>As to social climbing, this is the tip of the iceberg for parents. If the public schools are good, they can join country clubs, or socialize at their other clubs or work. Happens in the suburbs on a regular basis, although many suburban kids also go to private schools. I don't understand why it is a problem? Should private or religious schools be illegal?</p>
<p>You hit the nail by saying influential people get business from influential people. You are wise beyond your age. You will do very good in life.</p>
<p>If parents make more than $million dollar per year, what would you spend the money - on getting better education for kids.</p>
<p>My kids attend the elite boarding prep school on full aid. If opportunities present you one must choose. If one can not afford then it is okay to stay in local high school and work harder. Do not tell other parents what to do. But I tell you education quality is way beyond you can imagine. How many public schools have internal resources to offer courses beyond APs in math/sciences/humanities while still in high school? Prep school offers these opportunities. The competition is within and with your self. You meet the people who make policy decision about day to day running of the country. You are exposed to thing which will prepare you beyond education. These are real life situations where you learn and get confident. If financially one can afford, they must provide to their kids. However, it is okay to stay home and hopefully your kids will be allowed to send their kids to prep school.</p>
<p>The pressure at some of these schools is beyond intense. I hope people are saving money for therapy bills for the future, as some of these kids will definitely need it.</p>
<p>A good education is a wonderful gift. The results of this intense pressure, stress and the ensuing potential psychological problems from parents who push too much (for some of thse kids, these elite private schools are really not "all that") will be evident in the future.</p>
<p>There is also a lot of pressure in public high schools, either to succeed or to do other activities. I don't think it is necessarily the school, but the expectations, either from society, parents or students themselves. From what I've seen in the inner-city schools, more academics and higher expectations would be welcome. </p>
<p>Why all of the bitterness about private and religious schools? Spending on education is a good thing. This is a capitalist society, and making money is allowed, as is spending on education. Seriously, what's the gripe?</p>