Okay. Here’s a summary of all of my worries about my future...

Pre-College Issues High School Life
1

Hey all. I’m a senior and you may have seen me go on and on about my misery on this forum. Well, here’s a recap of everything thus far:

  1. I’m doing all of this to keep my father happy.

My mom is overseeing my little brother’s education and my dad oversees mine. I don’t argue with him because…well he’s my dad. And we’ve always taught to respect our elders. I’ve had to curb my love of video games over the years just to keep him from getting mad or worse. He has threatened to shoot me in the past, and I just take his verbal (and plenty of times physical abuse). I work hard in high school in order to get into the college that both of us agree on, regardless of costs or self-examination. The son of a doctor is going to be a doctor too, or else.

  1. I’m doing the work laid out in front of me without question. And I might be overextending.

I’m taking 5 AP courses senior year and Calculus AB and Bio do not want to work together. But I just move on, taking the frequent B’s and C’s with frustration and tears. And since my dad doesn’t know anything about those two subjects (he can’t tell transcription from translation; he calls himself a doctor?), I’m left fending for myself. Friends? AP classes don’t really make time for that, so no chances of a study group happening anytime soon. And plus it would be pretty weird for the quiet guy to suddenly start talking to people in hopes of forming a study group. I’ve already had to talk to my guidance counselor about how “I am not my GPA,” but as much my heart is telling me to drop down, I don’t do that. Well, why not just drop down and save yourself your sanity, you may ask? A couple of reasons: it would look awful on my GPA (which, for the record, is still more important in my opinion and is what colleges are looking into more that sanity), it would destroy my National Honor Society membership (another great asset on my college applications) and it would make me seem stupid and not as hardworking as I’d like to think I am. I didn’t go to my high school out of my choice, so I just work with what I got.

  1. As a result, I have no idea what I want to do for myself. As far as I can see it, my occupation is “student.” I do the schoolwork laid out in front of me, no matter how rigorous, and don’t ever bother doing some soul-searching. And even when I try, my mind usually says “focus on what commitments you have to honor now, not in the future.”

Well, that about does it. What is wrong with my mindset? Is it all completely my fault? Am I wrong to treat my high school life like this? Discuss.

2

Everything else you have written is a byproduct of this sentence. You are being abused. The effects of that are impacting every other facet of your life. Please talk to someone and get help. If you don’t want to do it for yourself, do it for your little brother since he may be the target of abuse as soon as you leave for college.
https://www.childhelp.org/hotline/

3

If I heard what you said in my school (even if you were talking to a friend), I’d have to report it legally. Just sayin’…

There’s nothing wrong with curbing video game addictions. There’s nothing wrong with wanting the best education for your offspring and encouraging them to do their best (esp knowing they have more options in the future when they do well).

There’s everything wrong with making violent threats and any other actual abuse going on.

Have you told your guidance counselor about that?

Also want to add… don’t toss the whole thing out due to too much pressure. Do well for you and your future, but that often includes friends AND studying, etc. It certainly doesn’t mean you must be a doctor. See what you like for fields of employment. Success comes in many fields. You just have to find the right one for you (and you can do this without making a big fuss of it with your parents - sometimes parents need to be gently led a different direction than the one they planned for their youngster - all out wars accomplish little).

But if there is physical abuse and threats, that’s just plain wrong.

4

Your Dad just wants the best for you. His methods may not be appropriate, but I suspect that his intent is commendable.

5

^“Commendable”??? Threatening to shoot your child is not commendable, no matter what behavior is trying to be curbed.

OP, you need to talk to a trusted adult about this. Strangers on the internet really can’t do more for you. All the discussion in the world is not going to help you with this issue. Ask for help from people in the real world.

6

@MaineLonghorn: You misunderstand my post. His father’s desire for his son to excel at school & to become a doctor is commendable.

7

MODERATOR’S NOTE:

Did you miss the following part in the OP?

Regardless, @MaineLonghorn is correct when she says:

For that reason, I am closing this thread. OP needs to get help in real life, not on the internet.