<p>What is like for parents when the child goes to check the computer to learn of her acceptance, deferral or rejection?</p>
<p>I am hoping I will be still at work when S logs in to find out his results. Then I hope I hear the whoop from three miles away. :)</p>
<p>How do you allow for privacy while offering complete support?</p>
<p>December 10th cannot come soon enough.</p>
<p>^^ #3^^You can pretend that you don’t know what day it is! …in the broader context of the complete support they have been feeling for years. That gives them breathing some space.</p>
<p>D got some of all three. Basically I tried to temper my reactions just to provide some emotional stability, since her reactions were wayyyyyyyyyyyyy up or wayyyyyyyyyyy down.</p>
<p>What a fun day it was, three years ago, on, I think Dec. 11 (Stanford). I would not have been able to pretend I didn’t know what day it was. When S sat down at the computer (which is in our “family room”) at the appointed time, I went in another room to give him his space. A few seconds later, I heard “I got in!” We were both very excited…and what a great time he has had in college! Of course, had he been rejected, I would have said, “That’s really okay, I know you’ll get into X, Y, or Z, all of which would be fine choices.”</p>
<p>filo, that’s pretty much what I meant by my ‘pretend’ comment. I think I just didn’t mention it that day and found a reason to be on the other side of the house.</p>
<p>Our story is much like filo’s. We were very aware that 5 PM on Dec. 15th was “the moment”. D asked me to stay upstairs while she went downstairs to check on our computer in the basement. I heard a small shriek and then “I got in! I got in!” as she bounded up the stairs. It was wonderful. :)</p>
<p>At our house, ED day was a disappointment–for both kids. They went into a private room to check the computer…we were ready to celebrate or commiserate, depending on the results. Big hugs and then sent them out to do things to keep busy.</p>
<p>Both ended up in fine institutions on the RD round, but the downer taste of ED round lasted until the spring when the acceptances started coming.</p>
<p>D1 was at work when the result came out. It was heart breaking to hear her sob on the phone. I pretended it was no big deal on the phone with her, and I cried after I got off the phone because she was so sad.</p>
<p>My son went upstairs and checked on his own computer. Since he was deferred from both EA schools, there was no closure one way or the other. Did push him to get the outside recommendations in at least.</p>
<p>I’ll find out in two days. Ds has said that I can check his e-mail independently, but he wants to read the news for himself.</p>
<p>My S has already beaten me to the punch. He said if he gets into the EA school, the first thing he wants to do is order the t-shirt. I put out my lip, pouted, and said I was going to do that. Then I brightened and said this once, I’d pay for express shipping.</p>
<p>I absolutely let S read the email news on these things by himself. Only once did I do so for SAT scores, as he asked me to since he was in a location without easy computer access.</p>
<p>I didn’t let my parents know that I applied EA anywhere. They think I did RD everywhere…
so, if there is good new Dec. 15th I’ll let them know, if there’s bad news, I’ll let them know. IF i get deferred, I’ll just wait to April and pretend it was RD 
that way they don’t have to think about it</p>
<p>It was very sad when my daughter rushed home to get the mail (I was at work) to find out she was deferred from her first choice. She was heartbroken and was difficult to console. The good news is that she did end up getting in RD but went to a different college instead. When I was just driving her back after Thanksgiving weekend, she gushed that she was so glad that she was at her current college, and not what was her first choice. So life has strange turns.</p>
<p>^^That happened to D1 also, and I don’t think it was sour grapes at all, just her observation. Maybe destiny does know what it is doing…</p>
<p>My d texted every day at lunch to see if she heard from the college of her dreams. I kept telling her not to focus on it yet everyday I got the text. No word until two days before the final day (a full 6 months after she had applied!). By then most of her friends who had applied there were in so she thought it was a lost cause and had a good backup in mind. The day she found out was an early dismissal day so she was out to lunch with friends and it was probably the one day at lunch all year she didn’t think about it. I called her and just said, “I just wanted you to know the mail came”. She knew what I meant and told me to open it which I did and read her the letter. Since it was a large envelope I felt pretty safe in doing so. Her response - “wow”. It was great.</p>
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<p>Thanks for sharing that. I guess we never really know what would have been the path not taken or offered. My older son got into all the schools he wanted included the reaches so we had that experience. I guess I’m bracing for a completely different experience this time around. And if so, perhaps both experiences easy/enjoyable vs. hard/painful should be embraced. Or I’m just kidding myself.</p>
<p>I now know how it feels: It sucks. But ds got over it quickly so I did, too. Well, I will. Very soon. ;)</p>