Overbearing mother in college selection

<p>As someone upthread mentioned, the courses you need to be careful about are those taken AFTER high school graduation, during the summer before college. Those are the courses that might change your status to that of a transfer. Anything taken prior to high school graduation doesn’t change your freshman status.</p>

<p>It sounds like you are willing to work and save to pay toward your schooling in order to be able to go OOS. You might consider going to FSU and then paying for your housing on your own. </p>

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<p>If the GC is new, I can see how she might not be familiar with the common application which also had some changes this year. But really YOU…the student, should be filling out the common application, not your GC.</p>

<p>I don’t believe at all that the GC doesn’t quite know how to use a computer. Sorry.</p>

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<p>I agree.
Also, a person’s fluency with computing skills is no indication for how much they know about the college application process. Rejecting your GC can hurt you in the long run.</p>

<p>@shoboemom makes a very good point. It would probably be a lot cheaper for you to go to FSU and cover the housing cost differential to not live with your brother than to go out of state. You might propose that as a compromise for your mom (first see if she will pay the housing differential, but then see if you can figure out how to pay yourself if she doesn’t go for that). I am sympathetic for your desire for independence during your college years, just not with you giving up the investment your mom has already made and good deals in-state. The colleges you are talking about out of state are not an academic improvement on your in-state options.</p>

<p>That is a fair deal I guess @shoboemom‌ </p>

<p>My GC is 65+ and her knowledge does no go beyond the school’s scheduling system and her email. I think guidance counselors are supposed to have a common app account or something and that’s what the student set up for her lol. She is a fairly decent GC when it comes to other things ex. programs and scholarships.</p>

<p>Is she new? Because GCs have to make sure that teacher recommendations and transcripts get submitted, and that stuff is all automated through the Common App these days. I suppose there MIGHT be a way for them to snail mail the stuff to colleges, but what a headache. Is there only one GC for your whole school?</p>

<p>Oh please. Your GC is probably very capable of doing their portion of the common application online. I seriously doubt she is sending things snail mail. </p>

<p>If she is good with scholarships…why not talk to her about scholarships for the OOS schools you have in mind?</p>

<p>The GC is not relevant here. Most are utterly clueless and this is obviously the case here. The OP helped herself by finding this site and gained two dozen uber-GC. Let the GC do what they have to do and are capable of doing, and that is getting the transcripts to the right schools on time. The rest is entirely in the hands of the OP, or better said … to her fingers at the keyboard. She can find it all with ease. </p>

<p>And then come here for discussion with an open mind and ears. Telling her to pay attention to her GC is not what a rudderless student needs to hear. Why do you think she is confused? </p>

<p>Xiggi. Agreed. But my point…the GC is likely capable of doing HER part with the common application submissions. </p>

<p>And the OP says the GC is good with scholarships…and the OP clearly NEEDS scholarships to attend these OOS schools…so why not ask the GC?</p>

<p>And then search here! Lots of good info regarding college scholarships, and the like…which this poster has already received on her OTHER thread in the financial aid forum.</p>

<p>Agree - not all guidance counselors are cut of the same cloth and not all districts have the same expectations. Our district (usually ranked very highly in those lists) just got Naviance last year which CC people have been talking about for eons as if everyone has it. IMO it is just best to know and accept the limitations of the GC then plan to step up and be responsible for those elements before deadlines. If you are applying to private schools or publics that care, you may need to walk your recommending teachers through the process of submitting recs to the common app as well. That in mind . . . don’t assume limitations that may not exist. Talk honestly with your GC and get the facts so you can do your own planning.</p>

<p>The issue I’m reading on this thread is that the OP wants to go to college outside of Florida. Her mom has Florida Prepaid to some degree, and the student qualifies for some level of bright Futures. The mom has clearly stated that she would like this student to attend college in FL…presumably for the financial advantage it gives them.</p>

<p>Everyone here has said…the OP can and should look for options where she will be able to fund college with a net cost that is within the parameters set by her mom. This is not being overbearing…it is being realistic.</p>

<p>These issues really have nothing to do with the GC at all. These are financial issues the OP needs to reconcile with her mom.</p>

<p>In Florida, the GC sends the transcripts electronically to Florida PUBLIC schools. At our school, for everywhere else, we had to request a snail mail transcript ($2), pick up the sealed transcript, and mail it in ourselves. The GC did not help with ANYTHING else - no common apps, no recommendations, no suggestions, no scholarships. Our GCs are not 65 years old, but overworked. They specialize in Florida publics because that’s where the vast majority of their students go. They have limited time and help the most students by knowing the Florida process. We have kids going to MIT, Naval Academy, UA, but I assume those students did the ground work themselves.</p>

<p>I have one child going OOS and one to a private Florida school. We had to figure it out (and pick up the transcripts, apply for the scholarships, ask for recommendations without going through the guidance office). If OP is going to seek an OOS school, it’s going to be a lot more work for her. I can understand her mother not wanting to spend the time or money when there are PERFECTLY good schools in Florida (that was MY attitude!). I told my kids I would pay the amount I would pay for a Florida public school and they used that as their limit. The had a lot of choices within that budget, both in and out of state, large and small, public and private.</p>

<p>OP, ask your questions here and we’ll answer them. When you talk to your mother, have the facts and figures. Show her how it won’t cost any more money for UA than FSU or FAU. Open your eyes to what the Florida schools can offer you.</p>

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At my presumed “ghetto” Florida high school, the GCs were extremely helpful to their top students. Some GCs were better than others. Some were A LOT better than others. But the GCs helped with transcripts, recommendations, common app, programs that would benefit the student, awards and nominations, and much more. They really pushed to ensure the students that showed their potential could get where they’re going. While the students who applied to the top schools did have to do some of the work themselves, if they presented what help they needed from their GC, the GC would exhaust all their resources. Situations like these are uncommon, so they really strive for success. </p>

<p>Right NOW this student does not have the stats for the significant merit awards that would bring the OOS costs down to similar to FL publics with bright futures and the FL prepaid plan. If she gets to that point, she can talk turkey with her mom.</p>

<p>I suggested upstream that this student create TWO application lists…one using her current stats, and one using the hoped for stats. Be prepared either way.</p>

<p>Well, a good amount of things have been suggested, but haven’t really heard what from the OP what she will or will not be doing… 8-| </p>

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<p>However, it appear that the OP and OP’s mother have not had the money talk, given that it is a “touchy” subject at home, and most of the OP’s descriptions seem to contain assumptions, rather than reports of what the OP’s mother clearly stated (e.g. “price limit is $X”). The talk also needs to clarify whether the OP’s mother has other non-financial reasons for wanting the OP to stay in-state (it seems fairly common for parents to want the students to stay close to home, even if the further away school is less expensive).</p>

<p>I believe the OP has a brother who will also be in college when she matriculates. </p>

<p>But I agree. The mom and kiddo need to discuss any financial limitations on college applications. That will help the OP to make a well rounded list within those parameters…with perhaps a maybe school or two thrown in.</p>

<p>One of the GCs at my school retired so they split the senior class and gave 1/2 to the 10th grade GC and another to the 11th grade GC. I was a disaster! Thankfully, I have (^^^ as stated) taken advantage of my online resources.</p>

<p>As most others have stated, your Mom’s concerns is probably centered on cost, but she can also be concerned about proximity. She probably feels confident you can get a solid education at a reasonable cost in an area she is familiar with. Perhaps look at the OOS waiver thread to see if your stats would qualify for full tuition and think about schools that offer good programs in your major of choice in a familiar area.</p>