I have a rising HS senior and rising HS junior. We’ve done some campus visits, but beyond that, I’m at a complete loss about what to do next.
Is there a thread somewhere with a step-by-step guide to how to eat this elephant??
Thank you in advance!
As the parent, have you done the financial planning to know how much you can comfortably afford to contribute to each kid’s college costs?
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There are many good articles on the home page of this site but here are my condensed suggestions:
- Determine the budget
- Find a safety school (both for fit and finances)
- Create a balanced list of schools
- Submit applications by the deadlines
You can also do a chance me thread and users can give recommendations for schools that may meet your students criteria.
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You might also try to schedule a couple of meetings with your children’s high school guidance counselors – with your kids in attendance, so the GC can speak with everyone hearing the same thing. Of course, the meeting with your rising senior will be a little different than the one with your rising junior simply because of the different timelines involved. But you may have to be persistent in getting an appointment with the GCs, who are often overworked (and, during Fall Semester, overwhelmed); it is a case where “the squeaky wheel gets the grease.” The GCs should be able, for your rising senior, to provide information on relevant application deadlines for schools that you are looking at, and perhaps give you some suggestions for additional schools to look at; and also provide some information on admittance rates at different colleges for students at your kids’ high school. If the high school has a software program such as Naviance, then the GC might be able to help you with its use.
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I agree with other answers that one of the first things to do is to establish a budget. We took the approach that anything that we agreed to pay for the oldest was a precedent that also applied to all other children (one more in our case). I also told our daughters a “little white lie” and stuck with a budget that would not have been a disaster if things had gone 5 years instead of 4.
I also agree that finding a solid safety is a high priority. Often (but not always) these might be in-state public universities.
The third thing that I would put near the top of the list is for the student to think about what they want in a university. Do they want a small school or a large school? Do they want to be in a city, a suburb, a small town, or somewhere else? Visiting a few schools can help.
In terms of “large versus small”: A small school often will have smaller classes. A large school will typically have more available majors. Our oldest for example switched majors a couple of times, and ended up with a major (actually two majors) that some small schools might not have. Our youngest enjoyed the smaller classes at a small school and got to know some of her professors pretty well (which led to research opportunities).
Another issue is that the very top ranked schools can be academically very demanding. Students who are used to being near the top of their high school class might attend a highly ranked university and discover that they have become average. This means that classes will be aimed at students like them, there will be lots of other very smart students to be friends with, but the homework and tests have suddenly gotten more difficult. Some students will like this, some will not. For strong students this can be part of the task of figuring out what sort of university might be a good fit.
It can be helpful if a student has some clue regarding what they want to do with their life. If they want to go into nursing, or medicine, or engineering, or computer science, then this might point them to particular schools. For students who want to leave open the option of getting a law degree or an MD (or a DVM) they (or their parents) might want to budget for more than 4 years of university.
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Where I would start…
For your senior…have they requested recommendations from one STEM and one humanities teacher, filled out the Common App, and done the common app essay? That will get them much closer to the submit button once they figure out schools.
Do a match me post on CC for your senior (following the sample format). I found that process invaluable, even though D24 ended up changing her major and some of her preferences along the way. The more information you put in your match me, the better the advice you will get (and things like what your senior liked/didn’t like about the schools you already toured will also be useful).
If your school is anything like my D24’s, time with the counselor is very limited, so going in with at least a tentative plan should help make the most of that time.
I wouldn’t worry too much about the junior right now. With EA deadlines coming up in the next few months (and many schools filling a good bit of the class in EA), the senior needs to be the focus (though no harm in doing a chance me for the junior as well).
If you haven’t already, start a google doc for colleges and share it with your kid. So many details to keep track of. I thought I could remember, and I did until I didn’t. 
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Main thing for the junior is that if the student is likely to do well on standardized testing, the 11th grade PSAT is the qualifier for National Merit Semifinalist (and, if applicable, College Board National Recognition Program) status. Some colleges attach large scholarships to such statuses.
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For help with the Common App, see this link: AXS Companion – Open Resource
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Good advice here…
I will echo the importance of establishing an actual budget. Be honest and not aspirational.
After that, you really should let your student take the lead. This will be where they go for the next 4(ish) years, so they need to drive the process. You can help them by asking questions (what do they want to study, what kind of environment do they like, etc).
Establish a safety school or two - a real safety school is one that your student will definitley get into, you can afford AND (this is important) your student will actually be happy to attend. Seriously, this is the most important school on your list. Everything else is just gravy once you have a school you know your student would be happy at and can get in. There are tons of really good schools out there.
To find said schools, spend some time reading threads here. People list some interesting hidden gems. I found out about the Colleges that Change Lives list here. People list great schools that offer merit scholarships.
IWe used Naviance and CollegeVine to help categorize schools as reach, target or safety… but that’s very general guide.
Don’t believe in a “dream school”… it’s great to have a first choice and hope to get into reaches, etc… but there is no one path to success. Encourage your student to have faith in themselves and not the school they go to.
Don’t stress too much. It will almost certainly work out fine. Enjoy this year with your student, make memories. Don’t nag them too much.
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Yes! Get an application in early, and get that early acceptance; that will be a big load off for your child (and you also).
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One thing I had my children do that really helped was to create a spreadsheet that listed their criteria for a school so location, cost, majors/topics they are interested, extracurricular activities they want, cost to come home on breaks, placement scores, etc.
I had them put things in order of importance to them.
Then they used that excel spreadsheet as they looked at schools to determine if the school even made their criteria. If it did, it went on the list to tour or visit. We grouped them so we could do 4-5 tours in one visit.
They quickly got a feel for geography, majors/topics, and narrowed in to do the comparison. From there it was easy to see the top 3-7 to apply to.
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I think that the spreadsheet is a very good idea. One daughter did this in her head. The other daughter I think made a physical spreadsheet and wrote it all down. She has done this again as she is applying to PhD programs.
In many cases which school is the right choice becomes clear as the students creates the spreadsheet and as offers come in. In a few cases it comes down to a close decision where several schools appear to be very good options, and it is hard to choose between them.
In the end where the decision gets tough, I have been an advocate for using the spreadsheet, comparing plus and minuses, visit each school (possibly again), look at the spreadsheet again. Then put it all aside for a few days. Just walk away for a couple of days or for a week. Then do what feels right.
I am also a big believer in what @DadBodThor says about the most important thing being to establish at least one solid safety. Everything else is just extra credit. The problem my youngest ran into when applying for her bachelor’s degree is that she had multiple safeties, got into all of them with good merit aid, liked all of them, and then needed to figure out which one to actually attend. That is where the spreadsheet, careful comparison, and then walking away for a week all came in handy.
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