<p>I’m a second generation immigrant (actually, I have no idea what you call it, but my parents immigrated to the us and I was born in the south). Yeah, I do feel pressure a lot of times. My school grading system doesn’t do A + or -, just letter grades, but I know that anything under an A, or a 93, will cause my parents to get extremely angry. My sister had a few Bs at a tough science and math boarding school her junior year, and my parents always hold it over her head as to why she didn’t get into Harvard (she didn’t even apply, though… lol). My parents have this list of 10 or so colleges that I have to get into or else they won’t pay for my tuition… and they include some (not all) of the Ivies, Stanford, MIT, Swarthmore, Amherst, and etc. To be honest, I’m not even sure if they’re kidding about the tuition thing, but I hope they are…</p>
<p>Oh, also, I’m a sophomore and I live in North Carolina.
Don’t even get my started on SAT scores… I took it my first time (aside from 7th grade Duke TIP) and scored a 2270 with a 800 CR in October, this year… They were content, but not extremely happy or anything. Now my parents are expecting me to get 800 on math and writing by June to have a 2400 superscore. <em>sigh</em></p>
<p>Asian Americans don’t receive loads of stress and pressure from their parents just because they’re Asian. It’s because the majority of their parents came from very poor backgrounds, and had to work extremely hard to get here in the U.S, and want their children to do the same.</p>
<p>While my parents do put an emphasis on good grades and “pressure” me to focus on academics, I wouldn’t say it’s “bad pressure”. They still allow me to be independent and keep track of my own grades/ SATs/ internships, while checking in every now and then to see if I need any help. They know enough to not get disappointed at something like a ~210 PSAT score, yet always encourage me to do better (because they know I can). </p>
<p>You can put pressure on your children, but make sure to let them be independent. Don’t make them want to get good grades and good extracurriculars for you, make them want to get it for themselves.</p>
<p>Sometimes they don’t do it just so that you can have a better life. I mean, I’m sure that’s the main reason but there’s something else sometimes. Sometimes it’s a way for them to seem great among the rest of the family. My relatives in India are basically waiting to see if I go far in life. If I don’t, I will be the main gossip there and they’ll talk crap about my parents as well as me. So when you have a crappy family like that, your parents tend to put some pressure on you.</p>