Parental Communications with Colleges

College Majors Musical Theater Major
1

<p>As we are contemplating all the MT colleges and determining which ones would be a good fit for my D (which is quite difficult I might add), I am realizing that some of the information on the schools' websites on how to apply academically and artistically can be quite confusing and there will be a need to call the colleges to get clarification. </p>

<p>Since my D is and will be very busy over the summer with her summer program, math class, essays, monologue and vocal coaching, etc., I will be doing most of the information gathering as to application/audition dates and times. My D is perfectly capable of calling the colleges to clarify some of this information, but will be gone Monday through Saturday from 8 to 6 most of the summer.</p>

<p>I guess my question is, is it okay for me to call the colleges or do they frown upon parents calling and expect the student to do this? Will this reflect poorly on my D if I call? I definitely don't want to be labeled "that mom", if you know what I mean, lol.</p>

<p>Also, is it better to e-mail or call?</p>

<p>Thanks!</p>

2

<p>How about if you have your d do the emailing? She could do that in the evenings or whenever she’s available, and the school could get back to her when they’re available. Also, then she has a written record of what was asked…and how it was answered (you’re right – every school has so many different rules/procedures).</p>

3

<p>I think many of us parents who have been through the process were the primary researchers and schedulers. Mostly I could figure out the information online, though. If you can’t, and need to call, don’t worry, because at this point nobody knows who you are! If you really want to be mysterious you can say “My son is applying.”</p>

<p>I found that doing searches here on CC often clarified things I did not understand. When you search a forum, it is usually better to search for posts rather than threads, otherwise you have to do a whole lot of scrolling. Also, look under Theater majors as well as MT.</p>

4

<p>Just echoing the two replies above–we did a combination of both approaches and had no trouble. I did the first run of gathering information and setting up a spreadsheet, and I did call a couple of schools (including Ithaca, which we wanted to arrange early) to set up auditions. Any e-mailing with direct questions, my son did himself. I also asked him to forward any replies from colleges to me so that we both had the same information. You’re right, if the kids are working hard on getting ready to apply, they need help with the logistics! I got the clear impression that schools are used to parents getting in touch about these things, but it also seemed important for my son to establish his own relationship with the various schools, and e-mail worked best most of the time.</p>

5

<p>Another tip: Have your son set up a separate email address for college communications. My D agreed to give me that password so I would have access to read those emails, but she was the only one allowed to send emails out from it. There were times I framed the questions and emailed them to her to copy & paste, or edit. She felt it important that the emails were in her voice. Do not hesitate to make a phone call about logistics, but leave the questions about the program to your son.</p>

6

<p>To echo Shaun…we created a separate email in which all communication went to and from. Both my D and I had access. It is quite impossible to expect your kid to do everything if they are involved in a show, ec’s, ap classes, and preparing for auditions. Most days my D left for school about 7am and came home between 9 and 11 most evenings with homework yet to be done. If calls needed to be made I did them and if they asked who I was I said I was calling for D who was tied up in rehearsal. We were able to do most things by my research or email.</p>

7

<p>We did the same thing as shaun0203, we had a gmail account just for college-related correspondence that we both had access to. We used it for SATs and the Common App also.</p>

8

<p>Excellent ideas! I really like the idea of communicating by e-mail as then we have something to refer to and, as was pointed out, my D can do this at night or weekends. I also like the idea of having a separate e-mail account for all the college stuff.</p>

<p>Thank you all so much!</p>

9

<p>PLEASE know that your student (unless they are truly remarkable) cannot do this alone. I was shocked at how much work this took for the parent - and felt that I was really reinventing the wheel as I am sure every single parent of a theatre (MT) student did much of the same work I did. Simply put - YOU will need to make the phone calls. They don’t need to know your name. We all did it, right? Your student can focus on researching schools that appeal to them, preparing for SATs/ACTs, completing applications, writing essays, preparing audition material, etc. I made spread sheets of all the schools with lots of juicy details, as well as a follow up spreadsheet for all the auditions (and needed material) once they were in focus. </p>

<p>My work took so much of the panic out of my D’s life (b/c it is daunting as to how much work this is!). She could then take the spreadsheets and make decisions about specific material for each audition - down to what she was going to wear!</p>

<p>I am certain these schools know that the parents have to call. Especially if you live in completely different time zones - there is no other choice.</p>

10

<p>I did what Shaun0203 did and my mom sent some emails. However, my coaches helped me with some of the stuff. This site is also extremely helpful with these types of things regarding admissions</p>

11

<p>It’s true, it’s very difficult to go through this process without assistance. Now that I think about it, last summer I made an initial list of the programs I thought my son would be interested in, in consultation with his acting teacher (not at his high school, this is a local professional who directed a couple of shows he was in). My son and I looked at the list together and narrowed it down to about 12. Then I made a spreadsheet with application deadlines and monologue requirements and so on. His job was to do the applications (all were online) and select and learn songs and monologues. Essentially I was his clerical assistant and he was in charge of the artistic end of things. The common app didn’t help as much as we had expected, because all the schools had their own unique supplements. Then some schools wanted resumes and headshots sent separately, and another school wanted a specific essay sent separately for acting applicants only, and so on.</p>

<p>Some had November deadlines, other December, January, and even February 1. We found it was better not to wait.</p>

<p>Some schools let you sign up for an audition before you submit the application. Most do not, and have a whole process for signing up.</p>

<p>Ithaca, where my son will be attending in the fall, was one of the few schools to come to the Washington DC area for auditions. It must have been worth their while, too, because I know several terrific kids who will be going there, for Acting and MT and VP.</p>

<p>LoveMyMTGirl, do you know about “the unifieds”? I heard that term first here on CC. Generally the college websites don’t say “we go to the unifieds,” but they’ll tell you the dates they’ll be having auditions in various cities, and in most cases it’s because they are either doing the unifieds or having their auditions at the same time and general location as the unifieds. This is an opportunity to make one trip to audition for a lot of schools. You have to apply and arrange your auditions with each school separately, there is not one website where you can sign up for a bunch in one fell swoop.</p>

12

<p>Okay, I think I understand. I do plan on helping as much as possible with the clerical stuff. I have a spreadsheet started, but having a hard time getting the list down. I was able to pare down the schools where she would not get in academically which helped a bit.</p>

<p>Is there a link to a list of questions one should think about to hone in on the type of school to attend? I can think of some of the basic ones, such as size, area, etc., but my D doesn’t have a strong opinion one way or the other about those things other than she doesn’t want to be in NYC or SF. She definitely wants a BFA, but I know we also need to include a couple BA’s as safeties.</p>

<p>I have been reading this forum for a few months now and have learned so much. I did make notes of some things but didn’t capture everything which now seems pretty important. I’m trying to use the search function as much as possible and only post if I can’t find what I am looking for.</p>

<p>prodesse, yes, i do know about the unifieds and learned about them through this forum. Thank you!</p>

13

<p>BA’s are not safeties. Non-audition schools that your son is at the top of the academic pile for are the only safeties. Many BA’s are very competitive and some offer similar programs to the BFA’s. Look at the course requirements of each program for a better understanding.</p>

14

<p>Yes, I understand that all BA’s are not safeties. I should have said an academic non-audition fit.</p>

15

<p>Depending on how your D feels about certain training things can help. Is performing right away important or not? Some schools will let you perform freshman year while others make you wait one or two years. Does she want or need the challenge of a dance program? Such as will it bother her to be in beginner classes or does she want her classes leveled? Is it important to her to have classes with dance or acting majors? Some of these questions may help whittle down her list. My D’s idea of what she needed developed over time especially when she was able to visit a campus or work with faculty.</p>

16

<p>The musical theater college process is more complex and daunting than than the regular process, so we decided to find expert help. We hired an audition coach, who helped our son determine where to apply, based upon her assessment of his talent, as well as helping him select and perfect his audition pieces (in conjunction with his voice teacher, who s not affiliated with her). She referred us to a college admission advisor who specializes in musical theater, and this woman worked with our son to manage the application process. Our son’s audition coached also ad referrals of people for head shots, videos, etc. The only thing my wife and I really helped with was the logistics of the auditions. On the one hand, we hired experts to mitigate the uncertainty of the process. At the same time, we outsourced the “nagging.” It worked for us, and the stress level was much more manageable.</p>

17

<p>Along the same lines as broadway95’s comment, some MT programs emphasize acting more than others. At Ithaca, the MT and Acting majors take the same acting classes as a single cohort, at least for the first two years. This isn’t the case everywhere.</p>

18

<p>LoveMyMYGirl - you may be feeling overwhelmed at the moment, but I am impressed with your take so far on the process. You are doing a lot of things that you should be doing, so good for you! You will be a big help to your D. Good luck! Oh, and don’t forget to tell her to enjoy her senior year - have some fun!!!</p>

19

<p>In terms of shaping your list, it seems smart to go with what’s often suggested here and cast a wide net. We started with a long list of websites, and prior to setting up road trips for visiting, my son looked through the websites (based on school location) and made his first cut. We didn’t visit places that really turned him off for specific reasons. (I’ll confess that, on his own, he did watch YouTube videos that he dug up for various school productions, showcases, etc.–a lot of people here will warn you not to do that, but he found it helpful.) We visited as many schools as possible based on that first cut, even if it was just a walk-around to see how the campus and locations felt. He knew he wanted more of a typical college environment, as opposed to a stand-alone conservatory, and that he probably wouldn’t fit into a super “artsy” school culture, so that helped narrow the list. </p>

<p>By fall of senior year, the list was down to about 14-15. He winnowed it down as the year went on, but we agreed on a structure of about 1/3 non-auditioned safeties (applied to and was accepted to three), 2/3 auditioned programs of varying sizes and types (BFA, BA, big and smaller schools, etc.) but no more than three of the super-scary-competitive ones. He auditioned for seven and was accepted to three, two of which were in his top “tier” of choices. Interestingly, we saw no real difference in his acceptances on terms of how competitive the schools were perceived to be–like many kids you’ll read about on CC, he got into a couple of programs that are seen as more selective than some of the ones that denied him. I really think this was an issue of fit, as seen from both the school’s and the applicant’s perspectives. </p>

<p>For us, visiting–and auditioning on campus if possible–was helpful, as he had some experiences even during auditions that made him realize a certain school was a better or worse fit than he’d originaly thought. So although I was somewhat obsessively worried myself about crafting this perfect, balanced list, it did remain a work in progress, and we both learned a lot.</p>

<p>Hope that helped–sorry to write such a long post!–but two other things: the more your child can connect with other applicants and current theater students, the more s/he will learn about programs and what they’re like. My son got great advice from the TAs at his summer programs, not to mention his fellow students, and they all compared notes throughout the year via Facebook. And–to echo Marbleheader’s comment–encourage your daughter to make the most of senior year! It’s such a distracting process, but it’ll mean a lot to her in the long run to stay engaged with school and not just phone it in. You’re doing her a huge service by helping with the logistics, and you really will look back on this year and be glad you went through it together. Good luck, and have fun!</p>

20

<p>I didn’t encounter any issues at all with people at the schools when they had to deal with me as opposed to my son (this was also true with my non-theater kids when they went thru the college process). When you do your homework and call the schools with questions during your planning stage, they actually appreciate it. That way, you’ll have all your ducks in a row when it comes time for application, tour, video, audition, etc. For certain aspects, the kids will deal with the school, current students and so forth (my son knew “inside” tid-bits and pointers about programs that seemed to ring true and I had no idea where he got his info!), but for most logistics, etc., they are more than happy to talk to mom or dad. </p>

<p>We did logistics, travel arrangements, audition schedule, etc., and our son took care of all the things related to the actual theater stuff (audition pieces, etc.). He really did his homework, and that process was very good for him. I agree with everyone else that it is a lot to do and no high school senior can do it alone, with high school shows, SATs, other activities, trying to be a normal 17 year old, yadda, yadda. They have a lot to balance. Believe me, once they are in a college program, they learn how to do the logistical stuff (scheduling auditions, getting from place to place, working out what they will be available to do, etc.) quickly. What a difference a year or two makes!</p>

<p>Good luck with it!</p>