<p>Is it weird for parents to come for PhD visits? My mom would like to see the campus and area. She wouldn't tag along to any student-only events.</p>
<p>How about tell her to come and help you MOVE? Less awkward that way. Besides the grad school is going to be paying for YOU to come, not your mother. You're going to be incredibly busy that you may not see your mother at all.</p>
<p>Tell her that she can wait until August.</p>
<p>Umm, I agree with ticklemepink, and I am a mom.</p>
<p>now don't go giving me any ideas! I'm sure dd would nix that anyway. </p>
<p>yeah, it seems kinda weird.</p>
<p>My DD's grad school held a Parents' Weekend, completely organized by students.My H and I had a great time although the events were not well attended.</p>
<p>well i haven't decided on a school yet, so i'm visiting to see which one i like. it would nice to get my mom's opinion on the campuses and stuff. but i can see how it might end up being weird, especially since i'd probably be at student events all day anyway.</p>
<p>I get what you are saying, veeplus, but you are talking about where YOU will be living and working for the next few years. We moms are always well-intentioned, but chances are you will be looking for different things that will make you a happier, more fulfilled individual than your mom might be looking for. Certainly invite her to help you move in and perhaps to any "open house" events for family later on. But the decision at this point should be yours, in my "motherly" opinion. Best to you!</p>
<p>cut the umbilical cord</p>
<p>DS invited M to help him move and bring remaining bare necessities. She complained that she had to move a dolly with sofa, kitchen stuff, books, clothes, many blocks while DS parks the car. Pulled her back.</p>
<p>veeplus - I don't think it would be weird to take your mom (I am a mom BTW) providing you are staying at a hotel & not a dorm offered by the college. Now if you were taking her to the student events then that would be unacceptable and beyond weird.</p>
<p>Just because I am interested in the campus & surrounding areas does not mean that I need to cut the cord. There are many times I remembered things that my sons didn't because they were interested in different aspects of the schools than I was so I think I offered good objective advice. Where they decide to go is THEIR choice not mine. I am happy that they want to include me in their lives.</p>
<p>PS - I am NOT a helicopter mom.</p>
<p>I have heard of schools making allocations for partners or spouses, though, since for many it is a family decision. Anyone else know about this option?</p>
<p>It was weird to bring my wife to graduate interview weekends and that is somebody who will be moving to the area with me. I hope you aren't serious about bringing your mother to your interview weekends. If it is really important that you get her approval, go with her on a different weekend. I have heard of some people right out of college bringing their parents to job interviews to help negotiate salaries. It all seems quite silly to me.</p>
<p>Oh god.
You cannot be serious.</p>
<p>Belevitt, was it really that weird to bring your wife?</p>
<p>A friend of mine requested to bring her husband to a grad school interview, and they put her up in a king-sized suite instead of a double at the hotel. They drove, though, so the airline ticket was not an issue. The husband spent the days looking around the campus at housing options and grocery stores, etc, and practiced driving around in the area. She told me that it was very helpful to have him there to do "that half" of the business while she just focused on the academics. He did not go to any of her student events (i.e. info sessions, interviews, faculty dinners or happy hours), and she said that it was not strange at all, and it was nothing but helpful to have him there at the end of the day.</p>
<p>Yeah obviously if you bring your husband/wife to the events, that's just.... terrible.
If I were on the adcom, I would reject that person for sure.</p>
<p>belevitt - what? You think it was weird to bring your spouse? For heaven't sake she will be living there too. Why wouldn't she want to see where she was going to be living? </p>
<p>If you were taking her to meet your future profs & your fellow students then that would be over the top!</p>
<p>It was weird because the administrators weren't particularly thrilled about the extra burden it added. I was forced to book tickets separately (even though they normally arrange it all). Furthermore, I had to arrange for a place for my wife to stay (some schools have roommates for the interview weekend). Also, there are events for which my wife would be in the way eg. dinner at faculty member's home. This means that there will be timing issues. It required a lot of extra accommodation and planning.</p>
<p>belevitt - I would stay at a hotel while my son stayed at the school if that were the arrangements they made for him. He would never mention that I would be coming with him. I would let them buy his ticket & I would purchase mine when I found out what flight he was on. Of course, I would never expect to be included in any event either. That would just be more than awkward. I can see why you had problems. I think that it just depends upon how you do it.</p>
<p>Wow, I'm shocked this is even an issue. Whatever happened to the good ol' days when people in their 20's had to learn to be independent, look out of themselves, learn from their own mistakes, and come to a decision by themselves like an adult? If I were a PI and students interviewing at my school had to have their parents with them (even if they stayed away from student only events) I would worry about if the student would call me anytime they had to make a decision in lab or whatever they were researching. I'm not trying to be mean, but I would honestly be embarrassed if I had a parent anywhere near me on those weekends. People will think you're incapable of making your own choices. If anything just have them visit on a separate weekend after you've already had an admission offer, but before you've accepted. At least then you can chalk it up to 'wanting some outside input.'</p>
<p>shoebox - My son has been many places on his own. I don't go everywhere with him. He has been out of the country many times without me (before he even graduated from high school). He actually went to France & Spain by himself for a month a couple of years ago. He got on just fine without the help of anyone. </p>
<p>I just want to see the campus & area so I know what he is talking about. He was already there by himself. If he didn't want me to go I would NEVER go with him. Who knows if I would even be able to go? I probably won't go to his event in March if he is accepted, but I still don't think it is a problem. Oh well, enough with this subject. I guess we all have different opinions, but believe me my son is completely capable of doing what he needs to do. He has been doing it forever. If he NEEDED me to go then that would be a completely different story. I raised him to be independent and he is.</p>