@ucbalumnus Those deadlines to apply are probably all past, though.
@albert69 If you look at ucbalumnus list, some schools are still offering automatic merit until May 1. Some of them require higher numbers on the SAT–but they are out there.
I checked Howard’s website and it says basically “until the money is gone.” So if the OP is interested, she should call Howard University and see if there’s still money to be earned. Tuskegee also does not give a deadline.
The conversation at Cali’s house would be entirely different if NU weren’t part of the mix. Having an acceptance at an elite school that parents are either unwilling or unable to pay for is pretty much a guarantee of discontent for all concerned.
IMO taking a gap year, followed by one of the more affordable options, would be the best route. Maybe OP’s parents and grandad could be persuaded to match her dollar for dollar in whatever she earns during her gap year. That way they are all working toward a worthy, realistic goal.
Agree with those saying the mom is being dramatic and she’ll come around. I understand there being a delusional hope right now that these schools will suddenly start throwing aid. But when that ultimately doesn’t happen, Cali, do you really truly believe she’s going to refuse to give you any more than $0 to go to college? She’s literally going to want you to sit at home forever (since you can’t get a job?). People are asking you what she will do when you don’t get more aid, and you keep saying “I don’t know,” but I think it’s time to realistically consider it. She sounds naive, but there WILL be an eventual conclusion to these financial negotiations, and then what? She’s still going to insist you just don’t go to college?
What is the alma mater that she is willing to pay for? All of the schools you applied to are fine, so whichever one is the alma mater, I’d just go for it.
Also agree with whoever said Buffalo is a perfectly solid option. My boyfriend at Binghamton, which does not have a journalism major, is doing fine. Editor of the school paper and plenty of summer/winter internships at prestigious magazines. He just got into Columbia grad school of journalism (sorry, I’m just so proud of him 
). I can understand this professor is saying there are schools with stronger journalism programs, but I doubt he realizes the severity of your situation. If you are as promising a candidate as he thinks you are, you will be able to find success there.
edit, oops, typo.
@picapole Cali said her parents believe the entire south is racist and didn’t want her going to school in the south.
@CaliCash
Are you a URM? If so, is that why your mom thinks these schools will offer a free ride? Is that what your mom is thinking?
NU is giving you $21k per year towards college, but that will go away once your sibling graduates. So, that means taking a gap year and delaying enrollment would mean only getting that $21k for one year.
Is your mom often irrational? If so, does she come around after a bit?
This whole new “$0 budget” seems like a punishment of sorts. In your previous thread you mention that you’re the star academically of the family, so is your mom mad at you for ANOTHER reason?
@bordertexan Howard University is in Washington DC, so no worries there. A previous poster brought up both Howard and Tuskegee (which is indeed in the South). A second poster thought it was too late to apply, but I looked around on their website and saw no firm deadlines. The question is whether the funds have run out.
I did read the whole thread and yes, the racism concern was brought up about Alabama. But money seems to be the top concern for the parent now.
I’m hoping these are empty threats. I’m hoping there’s a secret trust fund waiting for me somewhere!
NU gives need based aid. Not merit.
OP, you need to invite your mom to the Northwestern trip with you. Maybe their dog and pony show will persuade her to dump 200K+ into your private education while you have completely reasonable public instate options for less than 80K. You also should talk to your grandpa ASAP, maybe he will promise to soften the financial blow.
You need to be extremely nice to your family if you expect them to give you a luxury gift of private education. You need to carefully plea your case instead of demanding things for yourself that your siblings did not get.
You even do not need a secret trust fund - you parents probably can fund NWU out of current income on payment plan. But they need to feel that their money are being well spent. They have to come to terms that their lifestyle will be affected for the next 4 years.
If there were a huge secret trust fund dedicated to YOU, this conversation would not be happening at your house…and you know that.
Calicash, you HAVE college options. They just aren’t what YOU want. You will have to make a choice. There is not magic cost of attendance fairy out there who is going to pay your college family contribution…only your family can do that.
Yes, it’s a disappointment to get an acceptance to NU, and then realize it is completely unaffordable…but you KNEW there would be affordability issues with that school…you were told that point blank in March.
And in March, you also said you had received decent merit awards at other schools. SO…you need to pick the affordable ones, and come to some decision about which one is where you will matriculate.
CC parents often tell students to ask their parents what they’ll contribute for college so they can set realistic goals. When a parent says $0, it doesn’t make a lot of sense to me for parents to suggest schools that are only affordable if the parents pay $5k-10k or more/year. Why tell students to ask their parents then disregard the answer?
Money seems to have been an issue for this family for a while. The older sibling has to repay the parents (for a SUNY, if I remember correctly). Cali wouldn’t have been asking if it would be okay to ask her grandfather for money if it weren’t an issue.
I think she should hope for the best, but plan for the worst. If her mom thinks that they can get a huge grant by telling the college that they won’t contribute anything they they can ask and find out, but Cali needs a plan in case they say no and her mom decides not to contribute. If she thinks her mom might pay the first year but pull her support later, she’s better off applying to one of the schools where she qualifies for a full ride based on her stats (listed in post #138) because she’ll no longer have access to those full rides.
She sounds like a smart young woman. I hope things work out the way she wants. But if she wants to go away to school and her parents refuse to fund it, she doesn’t have that many options.
@Austinmshauri makes a great point. OP, if your mom has a history of pulling this kind of bizarre stunt, if you are not confident of her “staying the course” on funding your entire college education, you need to weigh that as you make your final decision.
Will you be able to relax at college, knowing that at any point she could melt down again and insist the college FA office give you more money? Or once your sibling is no longer in school, will she be willing and able to pay more?
Just make sure you have a Plan B at all times. Maybe that Plan B is your grandfather, or maybe it is a transfer to a school that you could commute to from your parents’ home.
I am so sorry you are having to be the adult in this situation. No matter what suggestions you get here, your mom is going to do whatever she is going to do. And you will have to wait her out.
Gap year could be another Plan B option, giving you time to apply and secure a Full Ride for the folllowing year.
Calicash…on the thread about asking grandpa for money…you clearly state a few things.
- Your parent EFC for the first two years at NU will be $35,000, and for the last two (when your sibling graduates), $70,000. Will your parents pay those amounts...because need based aid is NOT NOT NOT going to cover your family contribution...and NU doesn't give merit aid.
- You clearly stated that you would attend one of your safeties. So...what happened?
- You were accepted to Alabama and Minnesota, with merit aid that made both affordable...as of March. What happened?
- You also have an acceptance to SUNY Albany...also affordable.
And then you got the unaffordable acceptance to Norhwestern.
Unless your parents are prepared to pay $35,000 at least for each of the first two years, and the full cost of attendance for your second two years…let’s say $60,000 a year. Then this school needs to be removed from consideration. Period. It is not affordable without your parents willing to contribute or cosign $190,000 in loans for you. So ask them if they will do so. If the answer is NO, then you know NU is not affordable.
Your parents earn $250,000 a year. They are also contributing $12,000 a year to help a grandparent. They are paying for your older sibling to finish her college.
You know…it’s not cheap doing the things listed above…and really, it’s their income to do with as they please.
I know you are disappointed that NU isn’t throwing tons of money at you tomattend. But their policy is to award economically needy students. You aren’t one.
And remember, if grandpa gives you money for your first year…that WILL need to be reported on your financial aid applications for the second year…so your need based aid will be reduced.
Lots of students apply to a reach school…and you never know about the aid until the actual package arrives. But if unaffordable, any student needs to be prepared to walk away from an offer of admission. The bills need to be paid.
CaliCash
There is another option which I recommend for students who cannot get necessary FinAid, and whose parents refuse to contribute their fair share. Go to Harvard.
What I’m talking about is the Harvard Extension School. You can study Journalism there. It’s actually a pretty decent option.
extension.harvard.edu
Harvard Extension is non-traditional. It’s mostly working adults. Courses are mostly at night. You can’t live in a dorm and will have to get an apartment with roommates. However, the cost is about $1250 per course and there are really a lot of Journalism classes and it can be your concentration. That’s roughly $40,000 for an entire 4 year degree.
Because you don’t have any money, you will need to move to Boston and get a day job. Perhaps take two courses a semester. Take as many AP courses and CLEP exams as you can to maximize the credits you get. Once you moved to Boston and became gainfully employed, you will become a Massachusetts resident. Over the summer, when Harvard gets expensive, you can take courses at UMASS Boston or at one of several community colleges and have the credits apply to your degree. So you can probably get 6 courses a year and it will take you roughly 5 years to get a degree in journalism and connections to help you get a good job. It’s not forever.
You can get a very high quality education while living and working in a terrific city.
Why should you do this? Because your family dynamic is dysfunctional and in order to repair it, you need to be independent and mature.
It sucks to have this thrust upon you, but as you go out into the unknown, you will have a realistic plan and be making forward progress toward your dream. You will make some mistakes, and mature fast, but once you do, you will be in control of your own destiny. At that point, you can repair the family dynamic on your terms. Or not.
Good luck.
@thumper The parents are not even paying for a community college for the sibling. They had the student make a notarized contract with them to pay back the 7k a year. How is any of this affordable with a $0 contribution?
Not sure just living there would qualify an under 24 year old to be considered for instate rates at a MA public…if her parents live in NY.
Gearmom, I agree. None of this is affordable…at all. The parents have made a statement about college finances. They are not paying.
You could get a job as a nanny in Boston or New York and live away from your parents and work your way through school.
@thumper1 My mom said our budget is $0. Even my safeties would be too expensive.
I need to have a serious conversation with my mother. I’m not even sure where to begin. You all are parents, so what can I ask that would help me get some straight answers while still being respectful?
The first thing I will ask is whether or not I will be attending a 4 year college in the fall.