<p>I knew of S1’s first choice admission before he did. I had called the admissions office to check on a paperwork mix-up since we had gotten a letter saying they didn’t have his SAT…which he had checked to be sent by the college board when he took the SAT in his junior year. </p>
<p>So… the SAT was found and the lady on the phone said…oh yeah, We have the SAT and he’s been admitted. I told him when he got home from school. It wasn’t a big deal though since it was a safety for him and pretty much knew he would be accepted.</p>
<p>I think it depends on your kid. My son does not keep up with when acceptances/scholarships letters are coming. He does not have a “Dream” school. Mostly he wants to find the best “deal”. I am at home during the day and I get and open the mail. When he comes home he goes to the Fridge for a snack. If an acceptance or scholarship letter has arrived it will be posted there. My son is happy with our way of doing things.</p>
<p>BTW he applied to some schools that he hadn’t even heard of before because I had found out on CC they gave automatic merit aid.:)</p>
<p>If we were not meant to surreptitiously check kids’ application email accounts, there wouldn’t be a “mark as unread” on the drop down menu! Geez</p>
<p>Only one of 5 of D’s colleges sent email admissions letters. Most also used snail mail to notify her if some part of her admissions package was missing, though for that they also sent emails. She checked her own-I never knew her passwords.</p>
<p>I agree with Snowdog on this. I also had trouble not wanting to tear into the letters–in many cases I think I was more excited/nervous–I knew more about which ones were super long-shots due to research, whereas my kids were somewhat happy go lucky about it all. I really think kid #1 would not have cared if I had opened them. Still, it was the beginning of a time when boundaries were really changing (healthy changes, normal changes) and it was good for me to learn to let her own her own achievements. </p>
<p>If anyone takes offensive or thinks I’m trying to tell them how to parent–I’m not. I recognize that families and kids are different. I do think college acceptance time is a good time to reflect about boundaries and the changing dynamics as you become the parent of an adult.</p>
<p>I can give you a more specific reason not to log in to your kid’s account–at least one school (Yale) has something happen on the website when an accepted kid logs in for the first time. I’m pretty sure it doesn’t happen the second time. If you log in for your kid, he’ll miss it. I don’t know if this is true at other schools, but it may be.</p>
<p>PS I have been known (deep dark secret) to hold a letter up to the light to see if it looks like happy news…usually, envelopes are too think and I am thwarted anyway. And I am not proud of those moments, btw! </p>
<p>While my Son and I had discussed the financial parameters well in advance, his superb guidance counselors worked with the boys at his school starting mid-junior year. There were forms for the parents to fill out and a single requested face to face with the parents and the GC.</p>
<p>Other than that, I stayed in the background. It was delightful. So many other parents reported substantial drama and angst (for them and their kids). Like several others, college application in the 1960s was pretty non-eventful, as I seem to recall.</p>
<p>I was not asked by my son to open anything and did not volunteer to do so. Isn’t this whole thing really a big first for the student (including rejection)?</p>
<p>I did ask him during college if he got something “official looking” in the mail at our house to determine if he wanted it forwarded to him or opened by me.</p>
<p>It is great now that he is out of college that his stuff goes directly to him.</p>
<p>Our daughter navigated the entire college application process by herself. My husband and I stayed out of it. This was her choice. I never even laid eyes on a single college application or essay. So it would have never occurred to me to do this.</p>
<p>In hindsight, I’m so relieved that whole process is over as it was extremely stressful for our daughter. Most of her friends and peers in high school were overachievers. So much competition to get into the “best” school.</p>
<p>My older son got his ED acceptance in the mail. It was a large envelope sitting on the kitchen table so the rest of the family knew was good news before he arrived home from basketball practice that night. Here’s the (now) funny part and my advice: if you are expecting a decision via snail mail, TELL YOUNGER SIBLINGS NOT TO OPEN THE ENVELOPE. Yup, my younger son (then 14) took it on himself to open the envelope and then resealed it in a completely mangled fashion.</p>
<p>My daughter has just moved out of state after applying to graduate school. Snail Mail notifications will come home to me while emails will go directly to her. I’m really wondering if I can somehow open her letters and scan them to her without reading them first. Probably impossible on many levels.</p>
<p>I let my son take care of admissions etc and wouldn’t read his stuff first or ever without his permission but I do have access to portals and check the financial aid stuff.</p>
<p>S1 is a graduating senior and still gets mail here and always wants me to open so I can sort through the crap, call him for important things and only pass along “real” mail. That’s our agreement. It’s not like he gets anything private (although I admit to being momentarily freaked out when he started getting Parenting magazine!)</p>
<p>My senior in college started mysteriously getting Parenting last year - I called to cancel it and was redirected to several different vendors - no one knew why it started coming, but they couldn’t cancel it!</p>