That little story brought me back to one of my kids that played T-ball when he was 5 and all he did was sit out in the field picking the grass lol. But I get it.
When my daughter got into her ED school we were jumping all around the house. Two years later they say they wish they had a video of me! This one is so nonchalant about everything when he said he was accepted to a reach he said it so casually we thought he was joking.
We take each day as it comes. We all will have failures in life but have to celebrate those successes as well as we never know when they will come and a failure is ok too!
For those kids who have parents that canât let their kids accept failure and blame their kids they are not doing their kids any favors. Makes my heart tug for them. Life is not all about grades or being perfect.
Itâs sad but it does happen. Last year, D21âs friend ('20) got yelled at by her distraught/crying parents when she was rejected ED by Brown. Then a week later, she was accepted by MIT and parents were proud of her again.
I saw that on the news! $75? They said it worked over Halloween but that sounds so chincy. The kids who have $ to travel I assume donât care about $75. But not sure what amount of $ will do it and it seems so late in the game now.
I admit I have a kid going to Miami and I am not thrilled one bit about it but she is not a wild child by nature and she is vaccinated. If she were not vaccinated there is no way in hell she would be going and we have already had a few talks about being safe, not taking drinks from anyone else, not being alone with people etc. and thank for itâs only for 3 days but I wonât rest east until sheâs back here on her way home. Separately she better wear her mask as often as possible because of variants etc and how bad it is there.
Exactly. Literally no one knows, no one cares, no one asks (different than transfers). Which is why I donât get the whole wanting to go to a school that shows you âthe loveâ, unless we are talking about money.
@coffeeat13 â wow, good info. Tks for sharing. I donât have concrete numbers, but I talked with a teacher at my Sâs school (a highly ranked public in our state) and he said ED outcomes were much lower this year too. My S said the kids were calling it a âmassacre.â Conventional wisdom is that the Pass/Fail grading Spring of 2020 may have impacted our admit numbers, but who knows.
My S21 was deferred from his ED and I really hope heâs not WL during RD. Good to be reminded that since we are not full pay itâs even less likely heâd be pulled from the WL. He has other good options; I hope heâll move on.
Are we allowed to do book recommendations? I just finished reading this novel set in one of those hyper competitive high school districts in the Bay Area. Very well written, super entertaining and realistic! In case you are bored. Lol.
Once youâre there a lot of those schools donât even show you the love anymore either. I have heard so many stories of kids getting merit money but then have to maintain these ridiculous GPAs to keep the money. One bad semester and they lose it and then what?
My daughter and her tight knit group of friends know who was on what waitlist or who got in there off a waitlist and they laugh. Or they laugh about who got rejected where and got in there. Doesnât mean jack. And on the first day of school everyone is pretty much in the same place as everyone else in their program.
They all will need to navigate the best course for them. Some will transfer some will find they absolutely love their second choice. Maybe last year wouldâve been a different ballgame for many of our kids but it isnât so we can only focus on what situation theyâre in this year. It always works out.
Iâm trying to find out about ED at our high school but, in the meantime, Iâm still kind of surprised that colleges arenât taking kids as they historically have from schools they know if thatâs the case. I understand that a lot of colleges had more kids to choose from this year. So, say we normally get five kids accepted to Duke ED on averageâŠwhy would that be lower this year? Are colleges using TO as an opportunity to take more URMs or grab more diversity geographically and so there are fewer spots for kids from known high schools? Will this trend go in RD with kids from our school doing worse? I donât have numbers on how many kids applied ED from our school. Iâm wondering if fewer applied ED (D thinks this is possible as many of the high stat kids she knows decided against ED this year since they couldnât do visits). Maybe that means that colleges are hoping to pick up their typical number of students from our school from the RD round?
I kept hearing about how AOs were going to lean into taking students from schools they were familiar with but @coffeeat3 's report doesnât sound like thatâs the case.
Our school which is also highly ranked in our state also had similar ED results. While we didnât have pass/fail last Spring the requirement was such that your final semester grades couldnât be worse than your Q3 grade so everyone had an opportunity to improve so hard to say how much grade inflation there was. It didnât really help kids that had A- from Q3 because there were not a lot of grades in Q4 - no finals, shorter quarter and AP classes had fewer grades. But kids mich lower had lots of chances to bring up grades. Just do an assignment and you will improve upon a C.
Last semester we were back to normal grading and some kids got killed. We donât rank but we do know certain GPA data points and the highest GPA took a huge hit. I think thatâs why a lot of colleges deferred kids especially in certain states. They want to see first semester grades this year and if a kid imploded or how they handled remote in case thatâs a likelihood next year. So many things going on.
Iâm worried about this! I want it wrapped up by May 1 so my kid can look for a roommate and not be stuck going random. If he is waitlisted he wonât look for a roommate where he committed because he wonât do that to someone else and then blow them off if he gets off waitlist. Hence very likely he can end up with random which I donât think is wise. Too many bad roommate stories out there. If that happens I might actually decide to encourage my kid to seek a single even though I prefer he be in a double. Iâve seen what a mess it is for kids that get in off waitlists after housing is assigned too and theyâre just stuck wherever and with whoever so not thrilled about that but for a kid if they get into their first choice then thatâs the trade off and I guess thatâs more important to them. However if you have a roommate from hell it can make for a very long year too.
Very good questions! I truly donât know. Our Naviance doesnât show the difference between ED and RD decisions â I think Iâve read some do?
I feel like Iâm going off of fragments of info - both about this year and previous years. I do recall, however, that for my D18, while she didnât apply ED, she had many peers with good ED outcomes (3 to Duke, 2 to UChicago, 1 to Northwestern, just off the top of my head) and weâre not a big school! Very different this year. Now the question is if this turns around for RD decisions to top schools or the pattern continues.
Iâm thankful that in NC we have good in-state flagships and I feel like kids in our HS have done much better with those EA decisions â maybe a few more WL but more in line with previous years.
Hi all, I found your thread yesterday and was wondering if you would mind giving me perspectives on the safety schools on my sonâs list? Like the rest of you, we are still waiting to hear from our RD schools.
My son is interested in studying foreign language, statistics, neuroscience and maybe poly sci or international relations. He was accepted to Furman, Clark, St. Olaf and St. Lawrence. He thinks he is most interested in Furman and Clark, but I am keeping them all on the list because we donât know a ton about the schools and they all cost the same.
Any thoughts would be greatly appreciated!
I appreciate the communication and honesty provided by our school college team plus the reminder to be better. This may not be my issue this time - but I am sure I have said other wrong things to my teens this past year and we all tend to remember the one negative comment to the 100 positive ones
Regarding ED acceptances, I think our college team was caught off guard a bit too - but also the kids not accepted ED went up a notch in school selection - from what my kids heard - not ever communicated by the college counselors. ie: Applied Stanford, MIT, Yale when they would have applied high ranked LACâs or State schools with highly regarded programs like UVA, Mich and UnivofWa. A lot of average excellence - a term I learned about on CC.
My kids are hearing mixed results from friends at the other area independent day schools and from a few kids they know in boarding too - yes, âblood bathâ has been mentioned in the ED round.
The counselors will guide and it is up to the students and parents to follow or not - they have never been a fan of ED to try for an admissions advantage and that differs from many selective private schools - but I think this year they let parents and kids just jump in with so much unknown and maybe doubting their admission experience due to the changing landscape with Covid and limited tests.
I agree that parents should back off - but from what my kids tell me and friends that live in other areas too - many parents are overly invested. Just try looking at the Red⊠site and you will read posts from kids pleading for help and validation when they are receiving such negativity from their family. Makes me sad and the kids are our school are already fortunate and I appreciate the counselors standing up to the parents - even if it is only a few kids - an important message.
Completely agree about bad roommates. And choosing your own doesnât necessarily workout better because kids often feel awkward bringing up the things that often contribute to poor roommate situations, i.e. mess level, sleeping and study schedule, how likely they are to have a live boyfriend/girlfriend or multiple partners, alcohol/drug use (all things that affected me in the days when dinos roamed the earth and my D15). I highly recommend a single if your S has the opportunity do a pre-orientation activity/trip. My S17 at Lehigh has had a single all 4 years. Did a pre-orientation trip, met 3 of his 4 best friends and loved having a single.
If thatâs not available then a single may present more of a challenge but could still be worth it.
My daughters completely lucked out with their roommates fortunately and had good experiences, but I am still haunted by my own experience. Not only was the roommate I was matched with no where close to anything like what I had requested I be matched with, my BFF and I had requested we be suitemates (the bathroom was shared between us) we also didnât get that. We were at least on the same floor but we not too happy about that. It was probably fine at the end of the day with the two of us but the roommate? Ugh, disaster. I had the side by the window, always the more desirable of course, and she had the door side. Her desk faced the door (in those days everything was pretty immobile) and she stuck her birth control pills right on the corkboard so anyone who walked by our room or in our room could see her pills, and trust me, she was no saint and EVERYONE knew it! Then when I visited a friend one weekend at college, I later found out she wore my clothes. Ew yuck, she was so nasty. Fortunately she was gone after a semester flunking out if I recall. My next roommate was nicer, but not neat and not the most hygienic but we got along. My daughters went through this crazy process of interviewing each other and luckily first ones were the lasting ones.
My oldest if he had not blown off college was set to have a single and that was the right fit for him. He would not have liked having other people walking in and out all the time and just also is not always the neatest. I know THAT kid.
This one can is pretty chill, but when he wants to study does not want the loud noise, does not have FOMO, probably doesnât care either way about joining Greek life or definitely not the loud and raucous ones, but would no doubt want to have a group of friends as heâs not an introvert, but finding the right mix, thatâs the key. I also would never want my kid to be out on their butt because of a boyfriend or girlfriend situation. It didnât happen in my girls cases but they werenât as bothered by it as others for some reason. Just said thatâs how it is. Itâs really such a tough call. My kids at least has gone to overnight camp so he knows how to get along with others, but regardless, if you donât have things in common, etc. it is tough and the last thing you want is other kids to also feel like they can walk all over you, or to be made to feel like you donât have your own personal space. Thatâs one thing I love about some of the larger suite style dorms, but many schools donât have those so there isnât a true private space for kids to just go and vedge when they need some personal space without leaving their rooms entirely.
What is he looking for regarding campus vibe, broader community, etc.? if all else is equal WRT money and majors, I donât see Furman and Clark as being a natural pairing (while I would say the opposite about St. Olaf and St. Lawrence).
D goes to a competitive HS with an experienced and effective college counseling staff. They said that the school did really well in EA/ED, with acceptances to HYS, MIT, and many other T-30 schools. They anticipate that RD results will not go so well. A lot will be revealed in the next four weeks.
He is looking for campus full of people that are excited to learn. He is most interested in a diverse student body and doesnât really mind if the campus is urban or rural. Clark and St . Lawrence have great foreign language opportunities and Furman is strong in the sciences. We had St. Olaf on his list because of music, but that has taken a backseat since he applied. We visited Furman 5 years ago when my daughter applied, but have only been able to visit the others virtually. I was wondering how people in those particular regions view the schools? Is there a good relationship between the schools and their towns/cities?
