Basically, my parents won’t let me go anywhere that is a lot of money. This is upsetting for me, who has a 4.0 GPA, 1370 on the SAT, does extracurricular activities and has the potential to get into a really good college. They told me if I get a full scholarship to a college I don’t want to attend, they’d make me go anyway. My search was pretty much limited to small schools that are desperate for students and have programs I’m not interested in. I understand that I may be sounding a bit inconsiderate, but my parent’s income is nowhere near a place where the money would become a priority. I’m not sure what I should do because if I’m not able to go somewhere I like, it’ll probably affect my future very negatively.
How about you look for schools that you like and that are affordable for your family? Have you asked your parents how much they are willing to pay?
Push them to give you a budget - $20,000, $15,000, $0 per year. It is good you will know now rather than later.
It is tough that you may not get to go to one of your top choices. However there are benefits to being the academic big fish in a small pond. The profs will think of you when they develop special projects, letter of recommendation for grad school will say you were the best student they ever had, less academic pressure meaning you can get school year internships for valuable work experiences.
Join the club. Yow are one of thousands and thousands of students whose parents don’t have unlimited funds and have to factor money into the college choice. Instead of moping about it, start to act proactively. Find out your parent’s budget. Seek out schools with programs that you which give merit aid or are otherwise affordable. Perhaps consider re-taking the SAT if you think you can improve on your score.
And more than the school you attend, your future will be impacted by what you do at the college you ultimately attend. Take advantage of every opportunity (ex. challenging classes, research and internship opportunities) etc. and make the most of wherever you end up.
And never forget just how many people would love to have the opportunity to attend a 4 year college in the US.
Your parents feel this way because they understand the value of a dollar. I was the same way all parents see is the price tag. I had no ideal how much price could come down with a merit scholarship and a bit of need based aid. It took my daughter showing me from a net price calculator what could be done to get my attention.
My advice is start with that show you parents would could happen and then talk to them about what they can afford. Work as a team from to find a fit for you and what they can afford.
There are also large state schools with lots of resources and course offerings that offer merit aid and honors colleges. Alabama is the “poster school” but there are others.
You can also put in a few reach apps to schools that have competitive full-ride scholarships.
What is your major?
To echo sentiment and ask for more information;
Do not try to argue with them under the basis of “You can pay this off, right? It’s my future!” Instead, try to logic it out and extend both your and their perspectives. Ask them what they can pay, try out some Net Price Calculators, show them statistical rankings and major/minor pages about your undesirable colleges to take their interests from them despite the price, and be sure to specify your goals for your life and future career and how a better college will help you.
I was in your shoes for a while. Before I figured out my potential for getting into private colleges, I was selecting between my state flagships, Auburn (which was around $16K in-state per annum after everything), Alabama (around $12K per annum in-state). My parents originally started off saying “get into the ones you can get into for free” and there were quite a few. However, as @Kevin308 pointed out, a bit of serious discussion combined with hard number consideration does go a long way to clear up the disconnect.
Just be sure that you are not setting your parents up for hardship; If they have the capacity to help or if you can figure out a way to make ends meet (and I’d set $5.5K per year in loans as THE limit), try to convince them that the extra money would be worth it in the end and justify it with what you care about. Make it clear; in my case, my parents thought for the longest time that I wanted to be a lifelong engineer and were shocked that I was so reluctant on UA Huntsville (in-state famous engineering / aeronautics school) until I explicitly stated what I actually wanted to be and supported my argument with reason. If you want to be something cool, make sure your parents understand and explain why a college doesn’t cater to it.
Best of luck. Most people have been there, and parents can be unreasonable when they don’t know better. Just let them know what’s up.
EDIT: Oh yeah; I was going to ask: what state are you in, what colleges are you looking at (good and bad) and what’s your situation for/against them, and what do you actually want to study/do/become. Also, ask how much money your parents can afford to pay for college as both a preference and a maximum. Be sure to ask this preference numerically, as “as little as possible” is not helpful to your situation. Also, I edited out stuff about financial aid; I missed the part where you said that money is not a major factor.
OP said money is not a factor but that is his perception, not necessarily a reality. It takes a high income to pay full pay at privates $60-75,000/year. He and his parents need to run NPCs and set a budget. Full tuition merit will still result in $12-14,000/year in expenses.
Here is the part that concerns me:
“When we are no longer able to change a situation, we are challenged to change ourselves.” Viktor Frankl (highly recommmend reading the book, “Man’s Search for Meaning.”