Parents, unconvinced. "Costs too much, etc."

<p>Okay let me start this off, by saying I have recently thought about the idea of going to boarding school. During this summer, I recieved a letter from Middlesex, explaining about it and so on. I thought nothing of it. Then recently, I recieved another letter from Portsmouth Abbey School. I then got the intiative to look into them. After looking at the tuition costs for portsmouth, there was no way I could go there. After researching other boarding schools, including Andover, Exeter, St. Pauls, Laurenceville, and Deerfield. I came to two schools which I really felt fit my personality and my needs.</p>

<p>St. Pauls School and Middlesex.</p>

<p>Both felt like they had nice communities, along with a nice "comfortable" feeling associated with being there. I was really intrigued by Middlesex's "Circle", it sounded like a... peaceful place to be.</p>

<p>While I like these things, I also was happy that they were both great boarding schools with very good education. And that is important to me. </p>

<p>After explaining this to my parents, they do not see it the way that I do.</p>

<p>Their main complaint is the cost. But I explained that Middlesex, and St. Pauls were quite generous with FA or so I've heard from my constant researching over the past few weeks. But even from the "Average" financial aid listed on boardingschoolreview.com , it would still cost around 11,000 Dollars per year. They make about 45,000 per year combined, and I have two siblings.</p>

<p>Neither have gone to boarding school. One will be a Sophomore in a Public High School and one a Freshman in College.</p>

<p>I honestly cant stand the thought of going to a public highschool, I feel that noone ever really wants to learn and are only going because their parents make them. I want to go to school to learn, and I want the best education I can possibly get without outrageous costs. </p>

<p>When counting in the costs of food, if it was 5 dollers per meal for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. I counted up to 42 Weeks, 10 weeks for the summer tooken off and multiplied it by 7 days per week and then 15 dollers per day.</p>

<p>Ending with the result of 4,410. 11,000 - 4,410 = 6,590 Dollers per year. I also promised to work as many hours as I could work during the summer (20 Hours per week as a Minor), to help with the cost. Assuming I work at a little higher than the minimum wage in florida, thats 8 Dollers per Hour. 160 Dollers per week, down to maybe 140 - 150? Dollers after Taxes.</p>

<p>150 x 10 Weeks= 1,500 Dollers.</p>

<p>5,090 Dollers per year. Honestly, that is only 11.11% or 1/9 of the total income of my parents. I feel that isn't too much, and that for my education, is worth paying.The 4,410 for Food is justified, because I would have to buy food either way.</p>

<p>I feel they are not allowing me to work at my full potential and I am being restrained by their stinginess with the cost.</p>

<p>High School leads to College. High School is the basis for College. With a Good High School Education, I will be ready for College. Boarding Schools will teach me to by Independant, and I love the idea of a tight-knit community like at Middle Sex, where everyone knows everyone. I wouldn't like Andover or Exeter because it seems WAY too competitive.</p>

<p>I love my parents, but they are being unreasonable in my honest opinion. I would like your opinions on this matter and what I can do to convince my parents that this is the right choice, because I wholeheartedly believe it IS the best choice for my future education.</p>

<p>For a family that makes 45,000 a year with three children, a prep school, if they will admit you, will probably give a larger financial aid grant. Tell them that you can apply, see what aid grant you get, and, if you get a large enough grant, you can go. If you don't, then you won't go.</p>

<p>I don't want to give exact numbers, but I got into Milton, which I believe (not positive on this, but pretty sure) has around the same endownment as St. Paul's, maybe less, and they gave me a little more than 11,000 and my parents make significantly more than 45,000. I'm European-American and not a recruited athlete, so it wasn't because of that. At Andover and Exeter, I got even larger aid offers.</p>

<p>Try telling your parents about this, and about my experiance, and offer a deal: if you get in and get a grant above a certain amount, they let you go; if not, then you don't. It's probably the best you could hope for in this situation.</p>

<p>I'm sure there's several students on here who could email your parents who have received enough financial aid, me being one of them. I'm going to a private day school with an endowment that doesn't even compare to that of top boarding schools which you're talking about. I come from an upper-middle class family and received more than enough financial aid too attend. St. Paul's also has merit scholarships, in addition to need-based. </p>

<p>If you are accepted into St. Paul's, your family won't have to pay a cent toward tuition. Earlier this year, or even before then, they said that all students who come from families who make less than $60,000 per year won't have you pay anything toward tuition.</p>

<p>What grade would you be applying for?</p>

<p>And prettyckitty, the financial aid at St. Paul's is more than double that of Milton's. :) I'm just saying.. lol</p>

<p>If your parents make a combined $45K per year and you are well qualified for a school (grades, test scores, ECs, etc.) my rough calculation based upon a family of 5 with one in college (tuition payment for college lower EFC) your family's EFC for boarding school should be about $3 - $5K per year. SSS (FA clearinghouse for calculating FA for boarding schools) does not have a calculator, but I use some of the college FA calculators which give me similar results (roughly the same EFC) with our situation.</p>

<p>The 2 schools you mentioned (especially SPS) are well endowed and should be able to fully fund your FA to the EFC, should they choose to accept you.</p>

<p>You think selling your parents is difficult. Getting admitted is even tougher when you are talking SPS.</p>

<p>You might want to start by using the college FA calculators and show that to your parents.</p>

<p>Good luck.</p>

<p>Thank you for your responses.</p>

<p>After telling the good news about the Full Endowment for the Tuition if below 60,000 Dollers income combined, I was let down, now my parents are telling me its around 70,000 combined, yet a few days ago, I was told it was around 45,000.</p>

<p>So if with 70,000 Dollers , does it make a huge difference or would I still get a high amount of financial aid?</p>

<p>An extra $25 in income will mean an additional $5K or so per year out of your family's pocket. </p>

<p>It is a big investment for your family to make. You need to understand the changes in lifestyle that your parents will need to make to come up with the EFC. I don't mean to discourage you, but $8 - $10K per year is a lot on that income. You've got to sell them on why that money will be a good investment in your potential.</p>

<p>I understand that it is a lot. That is why I have looked into working during the summers to help pay part of it, along with the fact I am fed.</p>

<p>Why do I think it is a good investment?</p>

<p>For multiple reasons, as I have stated before.</p>

<p>My education should not suffer or persay, not be as good as it could be , because of cost. I can understand if it was $20K per year, but if at $8-$10K per year, I think this is justifiable.</p>

<p>Also, that a boarding school will get me to be more independant and sociable.
I will be honest, I am one of those people who like to have a tight knit community, not a school with thousands upon thousands of students. That is why I find Middlesex Ideal. Depending on if I am accepted and the amount of financial aid I recieve, that is how I'll have to decide. I've brought up this idea with them. If I am accepted to a boarding school, with a good amount of financial aid, if they are unhappy with my educational, social, and mental prowess after the end of my freshman year, than I will go home, no questions asked to my local public high school. By doing so, I feel I am telling them "You are in control", which in this case would be mostly good I would assume. Though by doing so, I am not giving myself much of a choice, but one must sacrifice some nonessentials for the sake of bettering oneself. Do you not agree with that statement?</p>

<p>Overall, I have been reasonable, I've shown them its a good investment, and I've also shown them Im willing to help pay part of it by working during the summers that I am home.</p>

<p>DollArs. Please.</p>

<p>I think you should show your parents the St. Paul's site for example, that states a family earning under $60K typically doesn't have to pay anything. AVERAGE aid is just that - average. Many schools give the average of say $25K, but then say that awards range from $2,000-$35,000. So, with an average, so do get small awards.</p>

<p>In addition, you can APPLY without a commitment from your parents that you can attend if accepted. If they visit with you and then see what a great place for you it is, and then you (hopefully) get a good aid package...they MAY change their minds. </p>

<p>Worth a try anyway.</p>

<p>Wait-- aren't meals covered in the tuition?</p>

<p>You also have to remember costs of books, dorm furnishings, and if you live far away from Middlesex, the transportation. Will you have to fly? Anyways, books for me cost around $500 a year but maybe Middlesex offers FA at the bookstore. Also, if you plan on taking music lessons, you should consider that cost, too... Athletic equipment...clothes...laundry...etc... boarding school costs a lot. and there are some other fees you have to pay, like health center service (although... is that included in the tuition? i'm not sure)</p>

<p>Something my parents asked me: after high school, there is college and then graduate school and maybe even more school, depending on what I want to do... that's a lot of money. Wouldn't it be better to invest the money on college education instead of on a prep school?</p>

<p>Anyway, I think it's great that you are planning on paying a part of it by working over the summer. Also, you can probably get a job at school. I agree with everyone else, apply and see what happens. Good luck! :)</p>

<p>Thank you for all of the advice! I plan on using this topic as a sort of diary of how its going, what I've applied for, what my parents have said, and so forth, if that is fine...</p>

<p>I currently attend Exeter, new prep, and yes meals are covered in the tuition, atleast in most prep schools. But yeah you do really have to worry about costs such as books, preparing yourself for school (such as getting minor things like clothes/toiletries, sheets, but trust me it adds up) and health services, which are usually optional for most schools. </p>

<p>btw where are you from? transportation (like tuesdayair stated) can be somewhat of an issue</p>

<p>I live in South Florida. So yes Transportation would be an issue most likely, but I have never traveled by air before, so I would like an estimation on the cost it would be from Florida to the North-East?</p>

<p>EDIT: But the fact is, would I not need those clothes, toiletries, and sheets if I was living in my own house? So is that really justifiable in itself? Those are extra-expenses no matter if I was in my own house or at a boarding school. Now things like Sports Equipment, Musical Instruments, etc. are extra expensives I would likely not need if I went to a local high school. I understand the amount of money needed for a boarding school, and I understand that it is an investment, an investment of both money and my own knowledge. If I do not work hard, than that money is all but for naught, and I would never want it to go to waste. But if I work hard, is it not a worthy investment?</p>

<p>That is how I justify the cost.</p>

<p>hmm ... transportations mostly depends on how early you book ahead of time, atleast in my experiences ... and also, how often do you think you would be going back home in a school year?</p>

<p>$203 Miami-Boston in September. Really cheap.</p>

<p>I wouldn't be going home most likely until the summer. So two trips per year, 400 Dollers per year for transportation then. Thanks. How much are rental cars usually? Because I'd need some way to get from boston to the boarding school I get accepted to.</p>

<p>You could probably just take a bus, train, or cab. There's no need for a rental car for just a few hours. </p>

<p>And the $203 was for roundtrip. One way is $104. You would have to fly there in September, fly back for Chrismas Break, Spring Break, and I think there's a few long weekends but I don't know if you have to leave, and of course for summer. </p>

<p>So that's about $800 for airfare per year, but there's also financial aid available for transportation but I think you have to be really poor for that. I remember someone on here about two years ago who was accepted to SPS and had everything covered.</p>

<p>yes it is a very worthy investment, but you will need to buy (maybe or maybe not) new clothes for prep school ... you'll also need to buy things for your dorm that wouldn't go over the "I Already Pay For It At Home" blanket, things that you'll need to make sure you are comfortable, and plus you'll need to have plain old money in case you need it ... i'm telling you, it's only about 2-3 weeks till school starts, and i'm still getting applications for things that we need like having long-distance calling from a phone in your dorm ... i don't know about SPS and Middlesex, but these things will add up, and it will get costly, trust me</p>

<p>Unless you have relatives in the region, plan on going home 3x during the school year (Thanksgiving, Winter Holidays, Spring Break) when the schools shut down for an extended (> 1 week) period. Other break weekends can be spent with friends locally to save airfare.</p>

<p>Schools typically arrange transportation to/from airports at a nominal charge ($40 - $100 round trip depending on distance from school).</p>

<p>They have christmas and spring breaks? So I can't just stay holed up in my dorm and eat snack cakes or something xD?</p>

<p>I know Christmas is a time I should spend with my family and others their families. So I guess that is justified. Though I dont like the idea of spending 200 Dollers in Spring because theres no huge holidays during that time afaik. So, Christmas Break, Spring Break, and Going/Returning for Summer. 609 Dollers. Hmm. Still a good amount of money.. But I expected 200 Dollers for one-way, so I guess this 609 isn't so bad total.. Though I dont really like the idea of Spring Break, since I'd have summer break soon after, I dont see the point in it, oh well. I guess I could work under the table during spring break to pay the 203 Doller Cost, Christmas Money/Birthday Money will pay towards the winter break airflight expenses.</p>

<p>The one thing that is etchy is, I don't know what Im going to get finanicial aid-wise, but even before that I need to focus on getting accepted. I have a question.</p>

<p>For the TIP Program run by Duke University, funded by the Bill Gates Foundation, I took the SAT or so I thought/think in the middle of 7th Grade. What I am interested in, is this. That wasn't the SSAT correct? I have just recently learned about the SSAT, and I guess I will have to start studying for it if it is different then what I took last winter. Easier I would assume correct?</p>