So I graduated HS and I’m still unsure about college. I studied abroad most of my school years. Now I want to go back to my country for college but my parents won’t let me because a) I’m a girl and b) there isn’t enough money. They want me to enroll into an online college which I absolutely disapprove of. No, I’m not an inconsiderate brat. I’m saying this because I was homeschooled for my sophomore year and it was the worst year of my life. I had no social life, couldn’t go out to have some fun, and was all alone, eventually falling into depression. They won’t understand me or even trust me. They think if I stayed alone in Lebanon (my home country), I’ll become a slut or something ( the way my culture thinks about girls). They take reputation and family image very seriously.
About the money part, I want to work but -guess what- they won’t let me do that either. I’m turning 18 in a couple of months (before colleges start) and I feel like I have no control over my life at all. They are also so overprotective that they can’t let me go to the convenience store, which is just below the apartment btw, without making a fuss of it. I love them and I don’t want my relationship with them to be ruined but this is extreme.
Please any advice?
Where are you living now? (What state, if in the US?) Do you live in an area with other Lebanese parents? Are you asking what you could say to your parents to get them to allow you to go to a live-in college? What are your female friends doing? What are their parents’ attitudes?
What sort of college do you want to attend where are you living currently? What about attending a women’s college in the US?
I reside in the KSA. I hope you understand why I don’t want to study, especially at home, here. All of my friends are going to their countries for good.
Why not apply to NYU Abu Dhabi? + Women’s colleges in the US ?
Of course that’s assuming your parents 1) can pay and 2) are willing to pay.
But they may be okay with a self contained campus and all-women classes/dorms with RAs?
You want your parents to let you go to college in Lebanon. They do not want you to.
I think your situation is beyond the scope of college confidential.
It would be ideal if you could work with your parents. . . They want you to stay in the US. Can you share with them your worries that online college will be like your homeschooling experience? Can you come up with some scenarios besides online school or living alone in Lebanon?
^ op is a girl currently living in Saudi Arabia. Kind of self explanatory why she wants to go elsewhere for college.
I was just about to Google that: “KSA” = “Kingdom of Saudi Arabia”
@Rixoxss I have no insight into your specific situation, but I can offer “generic” advice. As I am sure you are well-aware, you are not powerless here. If your parents are saying that you have to live with them, then that means that they have to live with you too, so the arrangement cuts both ways. Also, it sounds like your parents do have your best interests at heart, even if their “solution” differs from your own. I recommend treating this as a long-term negotiation, where you do due-diligence on researching various college options and then presenting them to your parents. Eventually they will compromise, although maybe not right away.
Do you have a specific budget? If so, is it “zero”? How are your grades? Do you have test scores?
Oops, my bad. Sorry to assume KSA was a typo. And I’m of middle eastern descent!
What is your budget for paying for college. That is going to be a factor in where you eventually attend.
If you want to be able to work while you are in college, look at Canada and Australia. In the past they have had relatively favorable work permission for students.
You probably have some relatives still living in your home country. Try and get at least one of them on your side, affirm that they would vouch for your safety and well being while attending college there. Then, negotiate with your parents.
I appreciate all the advice from you guys. I already chose a reputable and inexpensive college, despite it not being the one I longed to go to (gotta suck it up ig). It’s cheap enough that I could pay the tuition myself if I get a part time job. I will be going to Leb this week so I will try to bring up the topic during family gatherings. I just hope that they side with me.
Thanks again
Thank you for updating us. Keep in mind that many students have “dream” schools that they never end up attending for one reason or another. Under these conditions, if you are able to have a say in where you go to school, and don’t have to go to college online, I would call that a victory! You will make the most of where you land. Good luck in your discussion with family and let us know how things work out.
@Rixoxss Well played. If they can’t somehow stop you from leaving, then they will likely become much more receptive to compromise solutions. Stay with your current plan, but be ready if they suddenly make a counter-proposal.
^ I took this to mean that the family’s going (girls/women aren’t allowed to leave Saudi Arabia on their own, they need a male chaperone.)
@MYOS1634 She’s taking the family to “Leb” next week and they don’t know about it yet?! Too funny. At any rate, I think I pegged the OP correctly as having some chains to pull to get her way.
@MYOS1634 Me and my family are just expats living in Saudi Arabia. We are Lebanese and go there every summer. Also, foreign females can leave the country alone.