<p>Northstarmom,
I sent you the link through PM</p>
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<p>Beautifully said.</p>
<p>Anyone who thinks every phase is the best phase has no standards. Kumbaya BS.</p>
<p>Wow, I guess I qualify as “emotionally impoverished.”</p>
<p>Not sure I consider those years the best of my life, but they were LOTS of fun. Loved every minute of it. Did well and mostly enjoyed my classes. Tried some new things. But mostly I adored being surrounded by dear friends all the time. Yeah, I did some drinking and had friends who drank way too much. But nothing extreme. </p>
<p>On the other hand, I listened to some of the American Life broadcast and some of these students seemed absolutely pathetic to me. But I don’t think this slice is representative of most of the kids who go to that school…or most college kids for that matter. We’re looking at the extremes here…and the visible extremes at that. If most kids vandalized and drove into parked cars…well, we’d have thousands of incidents every month at a school that size. That said, I would hate living in that town. </p>
<p>Nothing wrong with treasuring your college years though. I do and I don’t consider myself to be emotionally deprived.</p>
<p>I don’t think there’s anything wrong with treasuring one’s college days. I do believe something is wrong when adults remember those days as the best days of their lives, and then view their post college lives as basically quiet days of desperation (not suggesting, toneranger that you view your current life this way).</p>
<p>College was the best time of my life. Then, my second graduate experience was the best time of my life. Then, my early to mid thirties was the best time of my life, and now the present time is the best time of my life.</p>
<p>NSM…I see what your saying. But I also think college is a more carefree time for most than the adult years. No 40 hour per week (or more) job, no mortgage, learning all the time, lots of fun. My son is friendly with lots of students who have graduated in the last few years and many of them come back pining for the old times. It’s just what it is. Depressing, but I certainly understand the viewpoint. I cried for two days after I graduated. Turns out, adult life has been pretty cool for me…but certainly trying at times. All that responsibility…</p>
<p>Again with the either/or…</p>
<p>Seeing a particular phase as “the best years” does not mean that other phases were chopped liver.</p>
<p>I kind of tie my best years with immediately after college (care-free, independent, very little responsibility, falling in love, maintaining my connections with college) with the first few years of marriage + easily the first 12 years of motherhood. The infancy years were utter paradise.</p>
<p>But I also treasure my first years with The Love of My Life (teaching 
) – which was extended exhiliration – and the time period right now, when my children are increasingly independent in wish and in fact, and I have the freedom to have a less “enmeshed” lifestyle myself.</p>
<p>Hopefully it’s just a matter of degree for most people, and not a rejection of other phases.</p>
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<p>I live in the best time of my life because I choose it. When I stopped prizing the easiest or most fun as “best”, I became an adult. When I realized that some of the strongest bonds with other people are formed in the darkest hours, I learned to stop racing towards the light and just be. </p>
<p>I live in the best time of my life because there is no guarentee of a future for me and the past is gone. It keeps me in the present, open hearted and learning. That’s the best of life for me.</p>
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<p>Anyone who makes blanket statements about other people based on a single statement is pathetic and unlikeable.</p>
<p>As to best times/worst times/in between times - This brought back a memory of a friend from law school who graduated before I did. When I wound up in the same neighborhood for my first law job, he advised me that he found his life as a lawyer SOOO much better than student life. I also found that as much as I had liked law school, that I agreed on life post education. To be truthful, I found undergraduate, on the whole, to be equal parts fun and misery, which disqualified it from being on any list of the best years of my own life. I’m no longer practicing law, but this time of my life is just as good.</p>
<p>“I live in the best time of my life because there is no guarentee of a future for me and the past is gone. It keeps me in the present, open hearted and learning. That’s the best of life for me.”</p>
<p>Beautiful and true. All we have is now.</p>
<p>" No 40 hour per week (or more) job, "</p>
<p>If one loves one’s job, working can be more fun that was college. That was the case with me with some of my jobs. A big plus of working was no exams! There also was the pleasure of getting paid for doing what I loved.</p>
<p>maybe it’s got something to do with this…
[Study:</a> 45 Percent of People Satisfied With Their Jobs](<a href=“FOX 5 DC”>FOX 5 DC)</p>
<p>Finding work you love that pays enough to support your family can be tough. That’s reality. Apparently a majority of folks out there aren’t even satisfied (we’re not talking love here) with their jobs. Cynical but true. Given the current economy, I can see why some students are dreading the thought of graduating. </p>
<p>NSM…you are a very fortunate soul.</p>
<p>Too many young people are going to college with no clear purpose; it’s just the thing to do. If students are not motivated by 1) a love of learning for its own sake or b) an urgent need or desire to become economically independent from their parents, they will spend four years partying. Why expect anything else? We have constructed a system where people in their late teens and early twenties have all the freedoms of adulthood and none of the responsibilities.</p>
<p>Northstarmom…I love reading your posts.</p>