<p>Pick one position on the prompt and develop it. Either yes or not- but not both. </p>
<p>Beyond that, the essay’s logic seems muddled to me. “While knowing something about that person could be similar to understanding him or her.” Eh? if we know they are a carpenter then that is a fact. Even if you said they are depressed or like rainy days those are still factual data. </p>
<p>The IISRO example is just a lot of explanation. The essay must not be a informational brochure- its an argument about why the grader should be persuaded by your thesis. To me it looks like the stations gather a lot of data (ie facts). IISRO said nothing about concepts.</p>
<p>Zeno is an interesting example but I dont think you can develop it enough in the amount of time given in an sat essay. </p>
<p>The conclusion is a muddle to me. The conclusion is the point where you are driving home to the grader that your thesis has been proven. Remember the prompt was “as <em>important</em> as”. Your response is “In fact, they are so complimentary that they form highly complex subsets of one another.” They are subsets of each other? What does that even mean? The conclusion of an essay is not the place to introduce ontological arguments- either facts are “as important as” and here are the reasons, or they arent “as important as” and here are the reasons.</p>