Please grade my Essay :)

<p>Essay Prompt: Is it true that knowledge can sometimes be a burden rather than a benefit?</p>

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<pre><code>The premise that knowledge can be a burden is an unequivocal truth. Information, especially that which is not meant to be known by the beholder, can have extremely detrimental effects if received at the wrong time. Also, knowledge can be burdensome if it is only known by a select few; keeping it secret of ten eats away at its owner and can distract the person until the knowledge is made public. The veracity of this assertion is confirmed through examples in literature and in history.
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<p>A paragon from the field of literature that demonstrates the burden of knowledge can be found in Max Albert’s The Secret. In this futuristic science fiction novel, society is kept in the dark while its few leaders hold all relevant information. They therefore make all of the decisions, and essentially rule supremely over their citizens. However, one of these leaders and the protagonist of the story, John Manning, has a profoundly different mentality than that of this fellow commanders. He finds great difficulty in keeping information from his people, and therefore, goes through life feeling depressed and also pressured to withhold his knowledge. However, at a point when telling his citizens of the leaders’ plans for their society could save millions of lives, Manning does, and by doing so, relieves the terrible feeling of burden that had plagued him up until then. John’s knowledge was clearly negatively affecting him, forcing him to go through life bottled up and untrue to his own morals. Although John released this burden by informing his citizens, John had still gone through the majority of his life with a huge weight pushing him down and affecting his livelihood. Therefore, the protagonist of The Secret clearly shows that knowledge can be a burden through the negative effects of secret knowledge on his life.</p>

<p>In addition to literature, history also contains a felicitous example that corroborates the fact that knowledge can be burdensome. During a relatively small battle south of Germany during World War II, General Lemming led his troops into battle against the Germans. At first, Lemming and his troops were on track to inflict a quick and humiliating defeat upon the Germans. However, midway through the battle, Lemming received news that his wife of twenty-four years has died. Promptly after hearing this, the quality of the general’s instruction and guidance to his troops greatly diminished, resulting in a victory for the enemy Germans. As demonstrated by the detrimental effects of knowledge on Lemming’s orders, knowledge was certainly a burden on him rather than a benefit. This information, which came at a very unfortunate time, weighed heavily upon Lemming to the point at which he became an incompetent leader of his troops. In addition, this knowledge proved to be deadly for his troops, who, for the most part, perished against the German army. Thus, the case of General Lemming illustrates that knowledge can often be a burden rather than a benefit.</p>

<p>After a comprehensive analysis of The Secret and General Lemming during World War II, it is indisputable that knowledge can often prove to be burdensome rather than helpful. Knowledge often arrives at very inconvenient times, causing stress in already stressful conditions. Also, keeping information secret is a major cause of burden, as it is often very difficult to withhold information from those that the withholder cares about. We must learn that information is not always helpful and to consider that the knowledge we share may negatively affect those we share it with.</p>

<p>What’s a “felicitous example”?</p>

<p>How did knowledge affect John’s livelihood?</p>

<p>Your “Lemming” example appears to be fake. You aren’t a good enough fiction writer to pull this off.</p>

<p>Even if the above example is real, what does “greatly diminished” mean?</p>

<p>This is a four out of six.</p>

<p>@jkjeremy The knowledge John was hiding was eroding his morals, and forcing him to live in a shocking contrast. </p>

<p>A felicitous example is a well suited example. Just google words the next time.</p>

<p>The Lemming example sounds fine to me. Even if it’s fake, it’s not openly fake. He didn’t say Hitler ruled the French, he just invented a nice story - that if he invented anything. </p>

<p>To diminish is to lessen. Again, google words you don’t know instead of acting like an ass.
Quit playing the intellectual, you’re not one.</p>

<p>Foolish, if you ask me, this would at least get an 11. Great job.</p>

<p>Yo, Jeremy has earned the benefit of the doubt here regarding any opinions he may have. He has provided deep and meaningful comments to many seeking help in this community. You may disagree with his thoughts but you should know he is sincerely trying to be helpful. A little more manners, please.</p>

<p>Well sorry, kiss-ass, but I’m not that idolatrous (SAT word-respect ME muhahahahaa).</p>

<p>A post counter wouldn’t impress me. He was being annoyingly sarcastic and haughty.</p>

<p>I don’t care about ultimate motives as long as people still behave like that. </p>

<p>Oh Jeremiah, thou iseth very mercifuleth. Doeth not punisheth me. </p>

<p>Seriously, grow up.</p>

<p>CHD, thanks for the kind words.</p>

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<p>The word “felicitous” is misused.</p>

<p>You have misused the word “idolatrous.”</p>

<p>The reason I asked the student how “Lemming’s” livelihood was diminished was because I wanted him (the student) to elaborate. If he’d written what you did in your response, my question wouldn’t have been necessary.</p>

<p>As to whether I’m an “intellectual,” well, I’m not sure. That would depend on your definition of the term. What I do know is that I spend some of my spare time here sharing decades of experience and expertise. No one has to accept any of my feedback.</p>

<p>You tell me to “grow up.” Do you realize that I’ve been teaching reading and writing for more than 25 years? I have read and scored more real SAT and AP essays than you’ll ever see. I’m nearing retirement. I “grew up” a long time ago.</p>

<p>It is not my intent to be “annoyingly sarcastic and haughty.” Sorry about that (sincerely). However, it doesn’t do anyone any good for me to tell a kid that he’s done something well when he hasn’t. 90% of kids here are gifted students who do NOT want gold stars for bronze work.</p>

<p>^Jeremy: Don’t waste your time on an idiot person like wuttowski. </p>

<p>You are a venerated member on CC…:slight_smile: Thx for helping us!</p>