Please grade my essay

<p>I'm an international student, so unfortunately I don't have anyone to grade my SAT essays. Could anyone be so generous to help me grade this essay and give me some advices on how to improve it as well ?</p>

<p>Prompt : Are widely held views often wrong, or are such views more likely to be correct ?</p>

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<p>Public views have always been considered one of the best sources of opinions. However, such popular beliefs tend to be affected by various factors, resulting in hidden misconception. History and literature was repleted with proofs of common knowledge being indeed very far from the truth.</p>

<p>A prominent example of this can be found in Jane Austen's novel, Pride and Prejudice. At the beginning, Darcy, the male protagonist, was deemed by the neighborhood of Hertfordshire to be a selfish and prideful man who was considerate of nothing save himself and his family. As a result from a story circulating Meryton, he was also resented for robbing his childhood friend Wickham of the latter's rightful inheritance and sponsors which the late Mr. Darcy had promisded. Wickham, on the other hand, was regarded as a gentleman with amicable disposition. However, as the plot processed, we learned of a sharply contrasting truth. Wickham himself had given up his supposed dedication to the church, thus going against the notions upon which Darcy's father had based his support. It was Wickham's own unacceptable behaviour that had forced Darcy to remove the sponsor, though he was still tolerable toward his former friend, even paying the debts Wickham left behind. The caustic tale about Darcy was only the forgery of Wickham's resentment and hatred after the former refused to give him money to supply his extravagant causes. What the people of Herfortshire credited to be the undeniable truth was actually a despicable lie, and it was their prejudices and gullible judgments that had led them to misinterpret the true virtues of the two characters.</p>

<p>Beside stemming from subjective opinions, misleading information might be based on what was thought to be concrete truths. Geocentrism, for instance, was once regarded as the redimentary of all knowledge we possessed about the universe and geography. For many centuries, renowned philosophers and astronomists had supported this theory, notably Aristotle and Ptolemy, believing that the Earth is the centre of the universe. It was not until the 17th that this description was challenged by Copernicus, who presented the heliocentrism, placing the Sun at the centre of the Solar System that included the Earth. Further observation and elaboration had expanded this theory and by the 20th century, people came to accept it and even figure out that the whole Solar System was only a part of a galaxy. Despite being disregarded as nonsense by countless opposing arguments when it was first made public, heliocentrism overthrew the long-imprinted influence of geocentrism to become foundation of many modern astronomical theories.</p>

<p>Overall, ubiquitously known opinions were not the undeniable truths. Before accepting any of such information to be right, we should take them into careful consideration and observation. Only by doing that could we avoid making the mistakes our predecessors have stumbled over many times : to let popular opinions clouded our own judgements.</p>

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<p>Thank you very much for reading and helping !</p>

<p>Essay 2 </p>

<p>Prompt : Should we pay more attention to people who are older and more experienced than we are ?</p>

<p>It is in the nature of many young people to be confident about themselves and pay little to no attention to others’ opinions. However, as talented as some of us might be, it was always crucial to heed advices from the elders who are more knowledgeable and experienced than us. Various excerpts from literature have tested and proved the significance of their assessments.</p>

<p>Take the case of Percy Jackson, the protagonist of modern Greek mythology series “Percy Jackson and the Olympians”, for instance. Being a son of Poseidon, he was not only gifted with excellent powers and skills, but also had a natural propensity for being unrestrainable and not caring about what people think of him. His trainer Chiron, who had helped many heroes on their honoured quests to glory, observed this and advised the boy to train diligently and prepare himself well for what may come. As much as Percy respected Chiron, he didn’t actually gave a lot of consideration to the older man’s advice. It was not until facing difficult situations, for particular, in “The Sea of Monster”, did he realize that it was his neglection to training had doriate his skills and consequently leave himself and his friends vulnerable to the monsters. Reflecting on such incidents, the young hero learned to embrace just how valuable the experienced Chiron’s words was.</p>

<p>Another notable instance which substantiate the paramout role of the older people could be found in Suzanne Collins’ series “The Hunger Games”. Quite analogous to Percy, the main character of these works, Katniss, was also an stubborn person who had trouble accepting authority being exerted over her. She especially disliked her mentor Haymitch for his lazy attitude and drunkeness, generally opted to oppose his orders. However, Haymitch did provide her with two crucial advices that significantly enforced her chances of staying alive : to engage in the opening bloodbath under no condition, and to find sources of water as soon and as much as possible. Despite her previous antipathy, Katniss gradually grew to respect Haymitch’s accute judgements and decisions. His insightful knowledge and experience, both as a former victor of the Games and a veteran trainer for about twenty years, had not only been momentus to keep her alive, but also contributed to the rebellion. </p>

<p>In conclusion, every member of societies can benefit greatly from listening to older members, as their keen senses and enormous storage of knowledge can be of great uses in various aspects of life. As the world is manifesting rapidly, such invaluable wisdom can help create great difference.</p>

<p><em>bump</em> Anyone ? Please help me with these. I can’t find anyone living around me who can grade SAT essays.</p>

<p>First essay 10
Second essay 9</p>

<p>Thank you for helping. Can you please elaborate ? I really want comments about my writing.</p>

<p>There are spelling errors in the first, and the second example is not as in depth as it could be to get a higher score. A 10 seems reasonable.
Second essay is a no-no. Don’t use modern young adult fiction on SAT essays (Remember who is reading your essays). The explanations were inadequate compared to the first essay. This wouldn’t even receive an 8 on the real test.</p>