<p>Life used to be a fairytale. Inside of the storybook were pages of beautiful paintings, where angels were the artists who sprinkled rainbow colors everywhere. Underneath the clear blue sky was my father who was always smiling and protecting. My mother would be wrapped under his strong shoulders. My brother, my baby sister, and me, next to our dog, would make funny faces in front them, where spectacular sunshine reflected on our faces rang with laughter. My family was my world. It was surrounded by love, full of possibilities and magic. In this warm and secure nest, I would spend hours reading, writing, exploring history and exciting world affairs to feed my hunger for knowledge. I would talk nonstop to convince my parents of my views and new ideas, and dream up crazy stories to tell all my friends. I dreamt that someday my work would inspire the world, make it a better place somehow. I was such a dreamer. And for a while, it seems that all my dreams were coming true. How I wished this would last forever, but how quickly dreams can be shattered. </p>
<p>I could have never imagined that my world could change. It happened too soon, too fast, without any warning and mercy. A sudden siren outside of my door strikingly loud against the silence of the night, before I could understand what had happened, my father was already carried by several men to the hospital by an Emergency Ambulance. He was unconscious, his entire body was blue and shaking uncontrollably, his face was twisted, with eyes rolled up, tongue bitten hard, and saliva leaking from his mouth. This horrifying scene still plays back repeatedly in my head, like a nightmare that I couldnt wake up from. My father had a seizure, later diagnosed as epilepsy, a brain disorder that results in recurrent seizures that could be life threatening. Since then my father would have seizures every night, sometime several times a night. Smiles slowly faded away from my moms pale and exhausted face, replaced with red and swollen eyes from lack of sleep and deep worries. A heavy burden of taking care of a very sick husband, three young kids, a demanding full time job and endless house work was taking a toll on her. Watching the family falling apart, I too, was devastated and overwhelmed with fear every day, especially when nights approached. In those longest nights, while I was taking turns to look after my father, I could only let my thoughts wonder in darkness, pray to calm and overcome my fear of seizure. I realized that I must be strong and mature, as now I am more important than ever to share my mothers burden. I developed a stronger than ever bonds with my brother and baby sister by looking after them. Sometimes work can be overwhelmed. At one time, in order to save my moms time, the only driver in the house, it took me three hours to get to an internship interview. Facing these challenges, I learnt an important lesson that one can be very productive if gained good time management and organization skills. By doing that, I was able to continue to lead the school newspaper, trend academy, participate as a commissioner in the City, and work on two internships. Through darkest moments, I have become a stronger, and a more mature young woman. However, I was still unable to accept what has happened to my father whom I love so much and bind by the chain of my own anger and grief.</p>
<p>It was my spiritual journey in El Salvador, where I supposed to help impoverished people there in a summer trip with the Central America Refugee Committee, but they helped me in return that finally allowed me to put behind my emotion burden. Its a country that was severely damaged by the civil war, where murder rate was the second highest in the world, more than 70% of the people do not have a stable job, and most people only earn about $3/day. While I was helping children and families in the rural area, where I brought them medications, books, clothes and necessities, I become a very good friend with many of them whom I truly love. I met some teenagers about my age, who are more talented than I am, but sadly do not have the opportunity to get to higher education. I talked to a taxi driver, who was homeless most of the time as work is scarce. I become a very good friend with a girl called Sarai, who was about the same age as I. Someone gave her an iphone as a gift, but she didnt have money to purchase a charger and earphone to make it work because her mother only makes $2/day. Immediately, I gave her my spare charger and earphone. We both listened to music together for hours, and shared our sorrows and laughter. I met a very brave and wise man, Tulio. his brothers and sisters were all killed in front of him in the war when he was my age. Now that he has become the leader of the committee to help his people. I also met many other great people who traveled with me; their noble work influenced and inspired me forever. These people are professional doctors, engineers, lawyers, and they showed me how they use their professional skills to help people in El Salvador, and their education was what made them effective for a lasting impact. I have been very touched by the local rural people who continue to face social injustice. Walking in the path of this beautiful country where so many people suffer, I can connect and feel their sorrow as Ive been through my own share of pain. Suddenly my horizon expanded and I see things I couldnt see before, that comparing to these people; my own misery was incredibly insignificant. It came to my realization that Ive been living in my own little world all these time. Now that I am finally free, that I am capable of stepping out to devote to many others outside of my little world who suffer much more than I do through my study of human rights and social justice. Most importantly, I came to understand the value of compassion, selfishness dedication in exchange for new sense of life, love and peace at heart.</p>
<p>A new chapter of the storybook will be written by me. It will not be a fairytale anymore. It will be a book of a real life, of how l struggled to transit from a dreamy girl to an angry young woman, then how I started to accept and becoming stronger and more compassionated, and finally, to a person who is capable of selfishness devote to humanity. My dream has not broken yet. As I am opening the new pages, more than ever, I am ready to learn, to explore, and I know someday my dream will come true and that my work will inspire the world.</p>