Please Rate my Practice Essay

I have been practicing writing SAT essays using a 25-minute time limit. This essay had the prompt:

“Does being ethical make it hard to be successful?”

My essay:

Upon opening the daily newspaper, one can find copious revelations of yet another instance of malfeasance or corruption. This past week, the bombshell news has been the FIFA bribery/kickback scandal, but in the past similar stories have featured top politicians and leading corporations such as Enron and Worldcom. It might seem that success and a lack of ethics go hand in hand. Scintillating news scandals, aside, this is not the case. Being ethical isn’t a barrier to success; it is a means to success.

For every business embroiled in allegations of unethical dealings, there are countless more that operate with an ethic of honesty and decency. Google famously promised to “Do No Evil” when it became a public company in 2004. Since then the company has enjoyed overarching and continued success, and has earned a reputation for being reliable and trustworthy across all its varied lines of business. For this is what being ethical results in: trust. A corporation and its officers may gain in the short run through dishonesty, but over the long term it is the honest company that survives and thrives. The honest companies build a reputation for quality and trustworthiness that sees them growing for the long haul, and therein lies true, sustained success. Today Google is one of the most valuable conpanies in the world, with a market capitalization of over $400 billion. This is a value far greater than was ever achieved by fallen companies like Enron and Worldcom.

The effect of reputation even overpowers the impact of the law and the threat of legal repercussions. In the mid 2000s online poker enjoyed huge popularity, and poker websites sprung up by the dozens. These sites operated in jurisdictions like Antigua and the Isle of Man, where they were free to operate unregulated by American or other national law. Some sites were found to be engaging in nefarious activities, such as misallocating or outright stealing player funds, and rigging the deck to cheat players. However, one site in particular, called Pokerstars, never took part in such activities. In fact, they went above and beyond to ensure honest gameplay by creating an elite security department. And, like Google, they enjoyed huge success, unlike the other fly-by-night sites. They became by far the most successful poker site, and were eventually purchased for over $1 billion. They won success through their ethical dealings, even when being dishonest would have been extremely feasible.

Dishonesty may lead to short-term gain, but one cannot build a lifetime of success on dishonesty. That type of success can only be enjoyed by those who are ethical.

I’m targetting a 12 on the essay, so please tell me how close I am and/or what I need to improve/change to get that score.