<p>We are a 12 hour trip by car or a flight with layover away from UA. I worry about my D getting homesick. Has your student been homesick? If so, how have you dealt with it? And did someone on CC mention that the Honor’s Dean notes if your student hasn’t joined any clubs and meets with them about it? If so, that is great. I think an involved student is less likely to get majorly homesick. My D keeps telling everyone she is going to UA. I worry she’ll end up unhappy since it is so far from home and will have turned down great scholarships closer to home that are only available to new freshmen.</p>
<p>Personally, I think it’s better for our kids to be a distance away that make coming home for the weekend difficult at best. When coming home is an option, some kids use that as an excuse not to get involved in campus life. I’ve seen that with my niece and some of my older’s son’s friends. </p>
<p>We will all miss our kids and they will miss us, but they will be fine. Kids are resilient. Your daughter will likely miss you less than you miss her. And if she gets a boyfriend on campus forget about her ever wanting to come home.</p>
<p>We are the exact same distance away, and I really worried too. Although it is only my D’s first year there, she did go down early for AA, so she has been there a while.</p>
<p>D was part of the 3 amigos here at home, they did everything together during HS. They each went to different schools. I was very worried. D was not that social outside of her circle.</p>
<p>I would highly recommend Alabama Action. D made several friends before school even started through this program. </p>
<p>D took potluck on purpose and has really clicked with her room mates although she doesn’t “hang” with them. </p>
<p>We are from the Midwest, and people are friendly, but not even close to the friendliness of the South! I think unless your child doesn’t want to meet people, and chooses to stay in their room all the time, they can’t help but make friends. Maybe I am wrong, but my experience has been that my somewhat socially awkward academic has become a social butterfly and a fashion queen at UA. She is having a ball, and NOT even coming home for fall break. We will be taking the family on a road trip to UA to visit her for Thanksgiving break which she is VERY excited about, and it has given her something to look forward to, but otherwise…no home sickness on her end at all.;)</p>
<p>We are twelve and a half hours away also (South Texas). As Nicollec mentioned, going to AA was a good thing as she met some people there that she hangs out with now. </p>
<p>The only advice I gave my D was not to stay in her room. Get out and try different clubs. She has done that and some she only went to one meeting and found out it was not for her but others she has joined and is very active in them. </p>
<p>D knew one roommate going in and is friends with all of her roommates. </p>
<p>I think my D has been a little homesick but if so, I have not been able to get it out of her! We visited once and have sent a few care packages. She seems really happy and is enjoying everything. </p>
<p>Hope that helps!</p>
<p>linnylu, my daughter is a sophomore at a Big 10 so she is only a four hour drive from home. </p>
<p>Last year, her freshman year, she was very homesick. She had a horrible roommate and the work load was a shock. Even though I could have easily visited her, or she could have come home, she chose to deal with it from a distance. That was the best decision that she ever made. </p>
<p>No matter where our kids go to school (unless they are only minutes from home) they will experience being homesick. The best thing we can do for them is to listen and encourage them to find ways to begin feeling comfortable in their new environment. Running to them or letting them come home might make them, and us, feel better for the weekend but it will be even harder once they have to return to school. </p>
<p>At the Chicago reception Dean Carr said that if a student hasn’t joined a club after three months the Dean of Student Affairs will contact them to help them find something that interests them. </p>
<p>If your daughter does choose UA try not to let your worries transfer over to her. It’s amazing how easily our kids pick up on our insecurities and worries, even when we try to hide them. It’s really hard to watch our babies leave the nest, especially our daughters, but it does have its rewards. You’ll be amazed at how much they mature and blossom those first few months away from home, it’s a beautiful thing!</p>
<p>For us, using the facetime feature on our iphones has been something that really seems to help prevent or minimize any homesickness. It is amazing what a difference this has made with respect to the quality of communication with our son in comparison to a normal phone call, and it allows our son to see the family dog (which he really does miss 
) on a regular basis. Our son has also used group Skype to “get together” with his group of H.S. friends, all of whom went to different colleges, and has said its almost like they are all really together in the same room.</p>
<p>As I’m fond of saying, we are farther from Tuscaloosa than London, England. Making friends and getting involved are the antidotes to homesickness, and Outdoor Action and Alabama Action give students a BIG jump start on that. </p>
<p>There’s also WOW (Week of Welcome) right before the Fall semester begins, where the amazing buffet of clubs and extracurricular opportunities is on display for everyone to feast on. </p>
<p>Necessity is the mother of invention, and distance has facilitated much inventiveness for our son, yet another example of the “hidden curriculum” he is enjoying at UA.</p>
<p>I do think it’s VERY IMPORTANT for new frosh to participate in things like Outdoor Action, Alabama Action, and WOW week (Week of Welcome).</p>
<p>That week or so before school starts really sets things up well. Some make the mistake of arriving right before classes start and they miss all those “ice breakers” and opportunities to make new friends and such. </p>
<p>Also, be sure to get a frosh football ticket packet. Even if your child isn’t a football fan, if roomies/friends are going to games, then your child should go, too. The home games are more than just football…it’s music, singing, food, and interesting entertainment! :)</p>
<p>I think the fall football season is so exciting that many kids have little time to become homesick on weekends. lol And, now that the basketball team seems to be much better, that will keep things hopping in the spring. :)</p>
<p>linnylu … I can fully sympathize with your worry, but I FULLY support all that has been said here in response to your question. Some of my best and closest friends to this day are guys that were on my dorm floor my freshman year at school, and 4 of them stood up at my wedding. Before my D left for school, I took her out to lunch and imparted how incredibly “magic” those first few weeks at school are. EVERYONE more or less is in the same boat, and are hyper-sensitive to the information, the people, and the relationships that are being experienced … and they stick. So, doing one of the programs before school starts (my daughter did Alabama Action) was invaluable. She has a group from AA, a group from CBHP & Honors HCA committees, and a group from her religious club … as well as, her roommates. While she only “hangs out” regularly with one of them, she is friendly with all. My D is coming home for mid-term break TOMORROW and we are SO excited, but it is not from homesickness that is driving her visit. She’s been gone for 2.5 month now, and she misses us, she’ll admit that openly. But she is not homesick. She’s WAY too busy to be homesick! Another thing that helps is SKYPE and TEXT … our ability to “see” each other while we chat once a week makes things SO much easier. If she wasn’t happy, we’d see it on her face. She has been sick twice, and being able to see her via chat, we could really tell when she was SICK and when she was better and helped us guide her about staying in for extra rest, etc. My 2 cents. I hope it helps. :-)</p>
<p>Homesickness is to be expected, even if one is only a couple of hours away from “home.”</p>
<p>My family lives 2000 miles away from Tuscaloosa, 2550 if driving. I came to UA having visited campus once and having talked to a few people on facebook. While Tuscaloosa is quite different from my hometown, it has become my 2nd home. My suggestion for all students is to get involved with different groups and to attend any event that seems interesting. I have met many of my best friends this way and wouldn’t have met them otherwise as we all have different majors. As others have said, Alabama and Outdoor Action, and Week of Welcome are great ways to meet other people. Also, it is fine if you can’t make every event that a certain club is hosting; come to the ones that you can fit into your schedule.</p>
<p>My DS is a soph and only seeing him Christmas and Spring breaks from mid-Aug. to May each year is hard, ON ME. </p>
<p>I concur with Dad2ILD’s statement: …(s)he misses us, (s)he’ll admit that openly. But (s)he is not homesick. </p>
<p>And that the main one he wants to see on Skype is the dog. LOL:)</p>
<p>Just remind yourself that you’ve successfully raised a child that is confident enough and adventuresome to go beyond their boundaries. If you feel good about it they feel even stronger.</p>
<p>My son comes home to see the cats and the XBOX, in that order.</p>
<p>I know I’ll miss my parents (and Florida) a lot, but I’m sure between schoolwork and activities and sporting events I’ll keep myself occupied!</p>
<p>linny…our youngest DD is a current sophomore at Bama. We live appx 11 1/2 hrs away in Kansas City and there are no direct flights to Birmingham. We have 4 children and each has attended a different University and 3 of the 4 have gone at least 8 to 12 or more hours away (Loyola of Chicago , Bama and Columbia in NYC). Our other DD attended MSU in Springfield which is about a 3hr drive. We are a close knit family and my husband was especially worried about our youngest DD getting homesick at Bama. When we visited she absolutely fell “in love” with everything at Alabama. From the Quad to the Freg to sorority row…she loved it all. We really feel as parents that a solid education is important but that also the time our children spend at college should be a growing process socially as well. It is a time to connect and network, to enjoy the social outings that a large university affords like football games, other sporting events, community service, learning to give and help others as well as fellow students in addition to going to class and pursuing higher learning in their field of choice… DD really felt that Bama met all the criteria of the college experience she was looking for. We were not interested in any particular financial package and even if she were offered one we would have turned it down so that those monies would be available for other students who perhaps needed them so I can’t speak to the pressure of taking the wonderful financial packages that Bama offers.<br>
We were especially worried because she went through recruitment and we were 99% sure if she did not receive a bid that she would not stay. Although stressful the recruitment process went very well and she is happily a part of the Greek system on campus. Being in a sorority has been a fantastic experience for her! She is very involved in her house and holds an exec position. In addition she is involved with several honor societies and a variety of different organizations on campus that are not Greek related. I know many have already posted…get involved …it passes the time and leaves less time for missing home.
I guess what I am trying to get at is that even though she misses her brother and sisters and of course mom and dad our DD loved and still loves Bama. It was her first choice…she knew this is where she belonged. I would encourage you to visit and to see if that “connection” is there for your daughter. I know that the financial packages are lucrative but they are not worth a child who is unhappy because this is not a good match for them.
I would also echo everyone who has posted that it is important to get involved. Going early for AA, OA or other Honors college activities is important. She will make friends who have similar interests and who will also commiserate about missing home when the time comes. Those connections will help her through the tough times.
We are lucky because in today’s world of technology we are able to Skype, and message our children. When our oldest went to college (she is now 33) we didn’t have that luxury. She didn’t have a cell phone but we had email and wow we thought that was great! My DD and I have “coffee” dates…she sitting with her ipad at the Ferg drinking Starbucks and me at the local Starbucks …we chat and sip and I knit and we catch up just like we do when she’s home. When she’s sad, her boyfriend will text me and we set up a Skype date …complete with Ben and Jerrys for both of us! Since both of us have iphones we actually shopped together today using the ichat thing (I am not a technical guru but it worked!). On Thursdays if our schedules permit we will both watch Grey’s Anatomy at the same time just as if we were home.
I send care packages once a month…the last one I sent was called “a Day with Mom”…I went to Walgreens and had them make me a 12 inch mini me. I sent it along with a letter that outlined what we would do if we had a whole day to spend together. I enclosed gift cards to each place we would visit and a little “blurb” about what we would do there. Although I wasn’t "there " in person it was fun to pretend and it helped her get through what was a particularly hard week.
If she truly “loves it” and Bama is her place then the homesickness will pass and she will get through it. It is good to be away from home…it makes you appreciate it when you return.<br>
Good luck…go visit…it’s a wonderful place …Good Luck and Roll Tide!</p>
<p>Thanks for all of the wonderful replies. I greatly appreciate all of them. You are all right that I will probably have more of a problem missing my daughter- that is how it is with my older child who is 3 hours away. I will make sure she signs up for Alabama Action or Outdoor Action. She is very involved at her high school and I can only see that continuing. </p>
<p>Ahpimommy, wow- you make a great care package and I love your other ideas for staying in touch! I am still chuckling about all the students who miss their cat or dog more than their parents!</p>
<p>I can’t wait to go visit UA and just feel incredibly fortunate that D has all these amazing opportunities in front of her.</p>
<p>I can echo all that has been stated above…we live over 400 miles away and DS has been just too busy with friends, football, clubs, activities, tennis intramurals, studying ++ to be homesick. Yesterday he changed his mind to come home for fall break and is catching a ride with 5 kids from this area…his only request is that I make homemade meatloaf and mashed potatoes:) Easy enough!
Alabama Action was a great experience for him and he has his "AA"friends! I believe that there is a limit on how many AA kids that can participate so my only contribution here is to sign up early!! Also learned that for the first time ever there is now a 14 deep waitlist for UA in Oxford program. DS is trying to figure out an alternerative summer program as he wanted to participate in that.</p>