<p>My daughters are trying to decline offers, some had cards, some didn’t. Schools that sent decline cards with non-postage paid envelopes, they emailed.
One received a nice letter in the mail from Drew and another emailed. I think it is nice to awknowledge them and they especially wanted to thank the schools that gave generous offers and were very nice to them.</p>
<p>Do it because it’s best to err on the side of being polite and professional; but that is the only reason.
^^^</p>
<p>Frankly, the only reason I’m interested in.</p>
<p>
The controversy exists because of the claim that 1) it is expected or 2) it will help a student get into graduate school at the same school later or 3) the school will appreciate it or 4) it is helpful or useful information to the school or 5) it causes no harm, to name just a few arguments tossed around here.</p>
<p>None of these true. While the school may save the document – either handwritten or electronic – this is done only for one purpose, as a CYA move in case of later disputes in the admission purpose.</p>
<p>Believe me, if the school wants to know that you’re not coming, they’ll send you a card to mail back, or an email to return, or an email form. Use that form. Don’t send anything extra. Otherwise, just don’t send your deposit and move on.</p>
<p>It has zero bearing on graduate school admissions. Undergraduate and graduate school admissions are handled by different offices.</p>
<p>All that these well-intentioned missives do are create a big extra work load for the people in the admissions office who have to handle all the carefully crafted letters and emails politely telling the school why you’re not going there, how much you appreciate the offer, and where you’ll be going. This takes time and costs money. In a time of sky high tuition, this extra cost is the last things schools need.</p>
<p>I think parents and accepted students are confusing an offer of college admissions with an job offer where, of course, a polite and carefully written letter declining the offer is very much expected.</p>
<p>Anyone who understands that,. depending on the school and the yield percentage, there could be tens of thousands of students turning down offers of admissions, will clearly understand the burden these unsolicited “thanks but I’m not coming” communications place on an already overburdened admissions office.</p>
<p>Believe me. I would not be writing this if I were not on the receiving end of all of these letters. </p>
<p>**Bottom line: We didn’t get your deposit. We’re sorry you’re not coming here. We wish you were coming here but there is no need to write or call. Please respect our workload and don’t burden us with extra emails or letters to tell us you’re not coming. Best of luck at the school you chose over us. **</p>
<p>I agree benny1…but we’ll probably get slapped down just as we did in the earlier thread on this subject.</p>
<p>My D did not notify the three schools she decided not to attend…they’ll figure it out when they don’t have her deposit by Saturday. </p>
<p>Each school she applied to received in the 10’s of thousands of applications this year. There was no personal connection between the admissions departments and D, we did not apply for Financial Aid, and D was not offered any merit scholarships. In D’s case, I saw no need to add to the paperwork shuffle by sending a note declining admission, and it seems benny1 confirms this.</p>
<p>Perhaps there is a distinction to be made between a large state flagship school and a small LAC. My daughter is interviewing with the latters, and there truly is a personal connection established with the Admissions folks. They email her personally, refer to specific things she has said, and generally work hard to let her know they view her and care about her as an individual.</p>
<p>When she makes her choice, it goes without saying she will write brief but sincere notes letting these good people know where she will matriculate and why.</p>
<p>These are all schools of under 2500 students. I do understand the situation is probably quite different at much larger schools. (Incidentally, that’s one of the reasons she’s only considering small schools, she likes that personal touch.)</p>
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<p>True!</p>
<p>Yesterday when I was out jogging, I ran into Deb Shaver, director of admission at Smith.(Always a bright spot in my day when I see her. :)) I told Deb about this thread, and she agreed with me that finding a nice thank-you note in an application file will certainly start the transfer process off on a good note, should the student decide to reapply down the road, especially at the smaller schools like Smith. She also said that she and her staff are always appreciative when a student who didn’t choose Smith tells them where she’ll be heading and why. Even if there’s no personal gain from doing so (except perhaps better karma), I still think it’s the right thing to do.</p>
<p>I have definitely seen many instances where the admission folks do come to care about the applicants. Obviously, they can’t remember everyone, but they really do fight for the ones they most want on their campus, and sometimes even cry when they have to say no.</p>