Hi all - My D20 is applying EA to a college with the following required essay prompt:
“The college admissions process can create anxiety. In an attempt to make it
less stressful, please tell us an interesting or amusing story about
yourself from your high school years that you have not already shared in
your application.”
She came up with a cute essay about a visit to Hobby Lobby to buy some yarn for a blanket she was knitting and being overwhelmed with the vastness of the store, the multiple holidays represented (Halloween and Christmas in August), etc. It’s funny and cute, I think, and definitely shows some of her personality. She thinks this essay prompt is asking for that kind of essay, and she might be right. I’m just a little worried that it doesn’t show enough of her qualities or really address any reason why they might want her on campus, other than that she’s kind of funny and quirky.
But, if I were an admissions person, I’d enjoy reading it and would think the kid was someone I’d enjoy being around. Is that good enough for this prompt or should I push her to try to stick in some aspect that shows a good character trait?
Does the story give them what they are asking for? If so, I’d go with it rather than try shoehorn anything in there that might upset the flow or feel contrived
It’s funny, and it shows personality traits which are not evident in the rest of her application. Being kinda funny and quirky are pretty good traits, I think. Aside from that, I think that it demonstrates traits like creativity. Moreover, a well-written story demonstrates almost every trait that most colleges want. The ability to tell a well crafted engaging story about a simple Hobby Lobby visit is, I think, a much better indication of a kid who will be successful at college than yet another less well written story about Persevering Against Great Odds.
In my opinion, as relatively uninformed and personal as it is, her essay is what they are looking for. I think that trying to create another essay which “demonstrates positive traits” may come across as more contrived and forced. This story is evidently something that your daughter has thought about and wants to tell, which, I think, will make a much more honest and personal story.
Our daughter wrote an essay for a similar prompt a few years ago. I would advise you take them at their words “less stressful…interesting…amusing”, and not change what she’s written, unless there are grammar errors.
Thanks for these responses! I agree that the prompt is a good one and she really enjoyed writing this essay more than any others she’s done that are more traditional.
I’ll take all of your advice and not suggest any changes other than typos, etc.