<p>Hi Folks, first time here in a looong time. </p>
<p>Funny thing is Digmedia, I think of you as being a more experienced parent.</p>
<p>Anyway, you may be pleased to know child 3 got a job IN HIS FIELD this
summer. He is huffing on the commuter train every day into the city to work at a large firm in their computer or tech. department. Yes, we do see him quite a bit although he has an active social life. It's great and we hope to keep this one here after he graduates.</p>
<p>I think you can keep your kids at home most summers before college graduation. What I think really motivates them as adults after graduation and possible before is where the jobs are. Your kid can either do the legwork himself, or go to job fairs sponsored by his college. The latter may cause student to settle further away.</p>
<p>Dd#1 gets in to the States from Turkey today.--haven't seen her since Spring Break. But once she's here, she'll be heading on a kayaking road trip with dd#2. THAT dd heads to I-Day in less than 3 weeks, so after today, she'll be playing. She's been working road crew for a month, so no, about the only time we've seen her is when she's working on our road! Dd# will start back on the road crew once dd#2 is gone--long 10 hour days+travel time. She doesn't exactly live here--she's in the ranch bunkhouse. It gives her free rent, plus her own space. She eats here a lot though!</p>
<p>Now that my D is finally home, we're able to spend some time with her. She got a job in a bakery so instead of stumbling out of bed at noon, she's just coming in from work. Last summer she was had a research spot at her college and we visited her during our family vacation.</p>
<p>I have the inverse experience, S1 goes to university about 10 minutes away (but does not live at home). Then during the summer, both S1 and S2 (still in high school) are gone all summer working at a camp in the Sierras.</p>
<p>Thanks for asking. This is a 12-month job. However, my wife and I try to see each other every other weekend. Tomorrow we are going to meet in Chicago, which we do frequently, and our son is going to fly in from LA. I'll go back to Madison on Sunday and my wife and son will stay over until Monday. </p>
<p>My wife will be visiting me in Madison at the end of June and then in early July we're going to Aruba for a week. At the end of August we're going to Hilton Head. We need to make plans for in-between.</p>
<p>We found with D#1 that we saw less and less of her as the college years went on.There was never a full summer home after the summer in between HS and College. Now shes a grad student,we saw her for a wedding weekend,a week at Christmas,a surprise weekend visit for mothers day/my birthday and shes coming home for her brothers HS graduation at the end of June and bringing boyfriend to meet family and show him NY..they'll probably stay about 10 days. If we see her after that before next Christmas it will be us flying to St Louis.
S already is planning study abroad for summer after freshman year (already knows he has funding and where he wants to go) then has a mandatory internship/practicum for his major after soph year..and it probably wont be back here,so he'll be following in D's footsteps and receding from the homefront.Its not so hard the second time, you sort of have gotten used to the comings and goings and learn to savor the visits. He's going to a real nice locale to visit in the winter so we'll do that (as we did for D who also picked a nice wintertime visiting location..I have considerate kids!)</p>
<p>Absolutely, both ds home for the summer and they actually seem to love coming home. They have both been home for a month now and both have 2 jobs. Does my heart good to see them working and happily staying home at night to catch up with the 'rents as they call us. I think it has a lot to do with them being 3000 miles away during the school year. Although we did get to see them about 4 times, visit back to watch D play sport, Thanksgiving to visit with both of them, Christmas break, and Spring break. H and I are the ones trying to adjust to the upheaval of our house being taken over again by the incessant ringing of cell phones, the running of constant waters for showers, the loads of laundry, the numerous trips to the grocery store, the blaring of televisions......Oh well, you get the picture, but suffice it to say they are home and we are happy to have them.</p>
<p>S will be home for two weeks after finals this week, then it is off to the east coast for summer school after which he will return home for a month. We would like to have him around this summer, and he has a standing job as a martial arts and stunt trainer, but he can get a year of chemistry out of the way in about 8 weeks, so it is off to summer school. My youngest a HS freshman this fall will be spending about 6 weeks in Beijing for martial arts training; we have not been alone for that period of time in nearly 20 years, it will be interesting.</p>
<p>Well, S1 was home after freshman year, but we rarely saw him..out with friends after work and always traveling somewhere on the weekends. He spent the summer after sophomore year studying in far eastern Russia and then travelled eastern Europe, finally ending up in London for a semester. He's been home a total of 10 days since then and is due home next week for another 5 days before he returns to CHicago to work for the summer. I think we're finally coming to the realization that he really lives somewhere else and comes home to visit. S2 is home after this freshman year and though working all day and going out all night he seems to be home regularly for dinner and the evening. Funny how their nights start around 11pm!! And they still get up for work in the morning. But given S1's trajectory I'm savoring this summer with S2...don't know what next summer will bring.</p>
<p>My daughter is finishing up her sophomore year. After frosh year she came home, reconnected with friends, worked a little. This summer she's coming home for a couple of days for her younger sis's graduation, then it's back to school for three jobs on campus. Most of her friends have jobs on campus so she is thrilled to be able to work, play and not worry about studying. I just ran into three of her friends from high school...all three are heading back to their schools for summer jobs.</p>
<p>Enjoy the time you have with your kids. It's fleeting, & exciting at the same time.</p>
<p>I was a little concerned about S's "bat characteristics" before he returned home, and gently mentioned that he would have to come around to our awake-during-the-day, sleep-at-night schedule once he returned home for the summer. </p>
<p>He wasn't thrilled at the prospect, but he's been home a couple of weeks now and has more or less returned to the non-vampire lifestyle.</p>
<p>I think some of what helps re-orient them is providing home-cooked dinners at 6 or 7 pm, especially if you're willing to feed their friends as well. They eat, they're full, they hang out for awhile, they get tired, go home (or not...) and sleep. And each day, it gets a little easier to awake with the early shift.</p>
<p>Oh -- and it also helps to schedule their medical/dental check-ups early in the morning. Oops, you have to have your teeth checked at 9 a.m. Oh my, how did that happen?</p>
<p>LOL dizzymom
I always referred to D as a "vampire" during her undergrad and HS years.Now,at 23 she complains that she "can't sleep like she used to" and is "getting the old persons disease of waking up early...like you Mom".
S ,new HS grad is well on his way in the vampire routine and cleverly got himself a summer job which entails afternoon and evening hours only.I might have to try the dr/dentist appt trick.</p>
<p>I think the dr/dentist appt trick for kids working late hrs is great. S#2 is graduating college next wk & will be home for a few days for S#3's
hs grad. He has 4 dr/dentist appts in 2 days since he hasn't been home for 9 months and after 4 days at home is heading to Europe for the summer and possibly longer if he finds work while abroad. S#1 who is 26 worked at overnite camp after frosh year but has never been home since; I know he's located out of town doctors and barbers but don't know about a dentist -- help! S#3 is graduating high school and will be home for most of the summer -- so far he's lined up only part time work with me encouraging him to look for more. I like to have them around the house some of the time but being productive (i.e., working) during the day is important (to me).</p>