<p>When I first discovered Barnard, I was thrilled. I loved all the academics, the fact that it is a small LAC in a big city with access to a large university, the location obviously and the general vibe of the campus. However, I must admit that I was a bit surprised after speaking with a current student (friend of a friend) that said she has encountered many problems at the school in regards to the student body. She said that she has found the girls there to be quite preppy, self involved and snobby as well as the general atmosphere to be cliquey, gossipy and cutthroat. She also said that it was extremely difficult to make guy friends and finding a boyfriend is impossible (she claims that all the men she meets turn into more acquaintances than friends because they already have set social groups and Columbia and there, in actuality, there is little intermingling between CCs students and Barnard students). Of course I am aware that this is just one person’s opinion so I should take it with a grain of salt but nonetheless, it got me a bit worried So i decided to create an account and ask you all what you thought and if any of this was true. Sorry if this was long </p>
<p>Anyway, i suppose the general question would be,
is she right?
are the girls really like that and is the social environment that catty and competitive?
And of course is this whole thing about not being able to make guy friends or a boyfriend correct as i was under the impression beforehand that it wasn’t as difficult? </p>
<p>Not in my D’s experience. She graduated in '09 and had a wonderful experience. She has dear women friends and guy friends from her time there. She didn’t have a NYC boyfriend, but that’s mostly because she had a long distance BF.</p>
<p>She had a gap year in Atlanta and is back in NYC for law school with an instant social network from her dear friends from college. She went to the Museum of Natural History with one today.</p>
<p>BTW: When in Atlanta she had no women friends but made two who were also Barnard '09’s.</p>
<p>My d’s experience was not at all like the one you describe, OP. She made wonderful life long friends, dated guys who were Columbia students and would not have changed her Barnard experience for anything. </p>
<p>Of course you will find someone who had a bad experience at any college you consider. You must go into your own college search understanding that your experience will depend upon how you approach it. My d went to NYC knowing absolutely nobody. She was thrilled and excited to make new friends experience new things. If you meet people who are “preppy, self-involved and snobby”, move on and meet some other people.</p>
<p>I’m a current senior, and while I’m not all happy-sunshine-yay-Barnard, the experience you describe is totally unfamiliar to me. I really do like most of the people here, and I am a very laid-back, operate-on-my-own kind of person. Even the premeds, while cutthroat, mind their own business and don’t make unnecessary competition. I have plenty of guy friends and have dated three boys in my three years here (more than I can say for high school). </p>
<p>The social life at Barnard has probably been the best I could have ever asked for.</p>
<p>I think the “majoring in unafraid” essay is a perfect topic for Barnard students, and pretty much sums up my d’s 4 years. There are a lot of independent minded, focused, highly ambitious and/or creative women at Barnard; the workload is heavy; and given the Manhattan location, most social activities take place off campus and in different parts of the city. The degree of connection with Columbia students probably depends a lot on the student, and whether she opts to spend a lot of time on the Columbia campus or participate in various student organizations and activities which involve Columbia students.</p>
<p>My d’s best friends her first year were Columbia guys, but she wasn’t looking for a boyfriend or interested in dating – at the time she had a bf attending college in a different city – so perhaps the fact that she wasn’t looking for romance made it a lot easier for her to make friends. The problem with dating/romance is that it seldom forms the basis for a long-term friendship if the sexual attraction and romance part fizzle out. </p>
<p>My d. did have some problems – some years – making friends at Barnard, but in hindsight I think part of the problem was the system of having freshman live together in the same dorms. All through high school my d. tended to be close friends with students who were one or two years ahead of her; her first year at Barnard her best friend ended up being a Columbia GS student in his mid-20’s. Her 2nd year at Barnard, she was housed in a suite with mostly juniors, and was much happier with the mix; her junior year she got put on a dorm floor with mostly sophomores, and was miserable again – but opted to study abroad in the spring. </p>
<p>So you might really consider what YOU are looking for in terms of college social life, and what type of students would be a good mix for you. Your friend-of-a-friend is relating the experience as filtered through her eyes – but whenever a person complains of difficulty making friends you have to consider the possibility that the person’s own personality and attitude may play a part.</p>
<p>You’re gonna find snobby/preppy girls at any school you go to.
Now, I love Barnard. I love living in the city. I love being part of a small liberal arts school while having access to an awesome ivy league university.
However, I will say it is extremely difficult to meet boys if you don’t put yourself out there. Sororities at Columbia are very Barnard-heavy because BC girls are so desperate to meet guys (haha, how ironic, joining a sorority to meet boys). At a co-ed school, you don’t have to go out of your way to meet guys- they live on your floor. Not at BC. IT IS SO HARD TO MEET BOYS. My advice is GET INVOLVED IN CLUBS (and not theater or music, because all the guys in those clubs are gay. Unless you’re looking for a gay best friend, which is awesome. But. You know. Not a boyfriend.) because thats the only way.</p>
<p>hmm … my daughter who is a second year at Barnard has not had the experience your friend’s friend has had … she has said there is an element of urban chic to the dress at the school (while she is more a jeans and simple top type) but she likes the other students a lot and was purposely trying to get away from schools that were “rich preppy” type schools … she also was lucky and had a GREAT first year dorm floor and made most of her friends from this terrific group … so I can imagine other students who were not so lucky would have very different experiences.</p>
<p>PS - I second the recommendation to visit … I knew when we were on campus about 5 minutes that my daughter would want to go to Barnard … there is an urban vibe, energy, edge to it which she loved … but found the students more to her liking than the other urban highly selective schools in the northeast.</p>
<p>"…it was extremely difficult to make guy friends and finding a boyfriend is impossible’</p>
<p>D2 actually did find a boyfriend, but on the other hand expressed the same sentiment about making “guy friends” generally. There are none in the dorms, very few were in her classes, so other than the clubs what’s left are “pickup” situations that are less conducive to friendship, she said.</p>
<p>So I guess from all of the above one can conclude that experiences vary. </p>
<p>At most LACs there is a dominant campus culture, types of kids who tend to be attracted to the school, and it is possible to find that you are not in the majority personality-wise and you actually don’t care for the majority. This is no different at Barnard than the other LACs. Best check out, then, that you fit. D2 reported there were a lot of kids who were from wealthy families, dressed rather fashionably/ “wealthily”, and went clubbing downtown on weekends. FWIW.</p>
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