Review on my readmission to college essay

Student Lounge College Life
1

Dear Admissions Counselor,

I was majoring in Athletic Training. I am currently on academic suspension, due to that fact that I could not maintain an adequate GPA, and I am imploring for another opportunity to be readmitted fall of 2018.

I understand that it was my own negligence that created the circumstances for my dismissal, and I have worked hard to regain my credibility. Being accepted at XXX was a dream come true; I arrived ready to learn and have a close relationship with God. However, I found it difficult to adjust to life on my own as a college student. I come from a very sheltered home and, I recently had to learn about independence upon my arrival to xxx. I was still immature and out of touch with reality compared to other students, since I relied on my family in the past.

Since my Suspension from the university, I’ve learned how my faith in God and my transition into becoming a responsible adult. I understand my past mistakes and learned to take responsibility of my academic failure and talk to my loved ones and a counselor on what lead me to being academically dismissed from school.

Before I became admitted to XXX, I researched what this university had to offer academically, and I saw that this university had a variety of programs that they offered to students who wanted to improve academically which fascinated my mother and I, Majority of universities that we researched did not offer these programs. My mother loved the idea of me going to a Christian school to grow closer to God and lead me to the path of righteousness. Upon my acceptance to xxx, I was put on pre-provisional hold due to my SAT scores in Math, and English. I did well my freshman year and I started to find my way in school sophomore year and I started use the resources that this school had to offer.

By the end of my sophomore year you could tell academically that my grades were suffering, and I had several mental breakdowns since I could not adjust to the social life here and I had to learn about in-dependency the hard way by finding a job, paying school loans, taxes. Which took a tool on me mentally and the people around started to notice, including my professors, I started to miss class regularly. I realized that my major, Athletic Training was not for me, I talked and emailed my advisor, but I had to wait to change my major because it was too late in the semester, eventually I felt that everything was falling around me, and I gave up, which was the biggest mistake that I ever made.

I learned what I did wrong and what I could of done to avoid those mistakes, The mistake that lead me to suspension was giving up. I have made several academics success plans since my suspension from college and I’ve come to terms on why I failed, and I made a promise with God, my family and Myself that I will not fail again and plan to succeed in the future. If I, am accepted for the upcoming semester I promise to make use of my time to be productive and responsible.

2

This is the edited version, can someone tell me if it needs more work or am I ready to submit this to my college for examination?

Dear Admissions Counselor,

I am currently on academic suspension, due to that fact that I could not maintain an adequate GPA, and I am entreating for another opportunity to be readmitted fall of 2018.

I understand that it was my own negligence that created the circumstances for my dismissal, and I have worked hard to regain my credibility. Being accepted at XXX was a dream come true; I arrived ready to learn and have a close relationship with God. However, I found it difficult to adjust to life on my own as a college student. I come from a very sheltered home and, I recently had to learn about independence upon my arrival to xxx. I was seen as juvenile among my peers.

Since my Suspension from the university, I’ve learned how my faith in God and my transition into becoming a responsible adult. I understand my past mistakes and learned to take responsibility of my academic failure and, talked to my loved ones and a counselor on what lead me to being academically dismissed from school.

Before I became admitted to xxx, I researched what this university had to offer. I saw that this university had a variety of programs that they offered to students who wanted to improve academically which fascinated my mother and I. My mother loved the idea of me going to a Christian school to grow closer to God and lead me to the path of righteousness. Upon my acceptance, I was put on pre-provisional hold due to my SAT scores in Math, and English. I did well my freshman year and I started to find my way in school sophomore year and I started use the resources that this school had to offer.

By the end of my sophomore year you could tell academically that my grades were suffering, and I had several mental breakdowns since I could not adjust to the social life here and I had to learn about in-dependency the hard way; by finding a job, paying school loans, and taxes. Which took a tool on me mentally my peers began to notice, including my professors, I started to miss class regularly. I realized that my major, Athletic Training was not for me, I talked and emailed my advisor. I had to wait to change my major because it was too late in the semester, eventually I felt that everything was falling around me, and I gave up, which was the biggest mistake that I ever made.

I learned what I did wrong and what I could of done to avoid those mistakes, I have made several academics success plans since my suspension from college and I’ve come to terms on why I failed, and I made a promise with God, my family and Myself that I will not fail again and plan to succeed in the future. If I, am accepted for the upcoming semester I promise to make use of my time to be productive and responsible.

3

I would leave out the discussion of several mental breakdowns in part because you never mention getting any professional help for these mental health issues. Also the word “tool” in paragraph 5 should be “toll.” Finally, in the last paragraph you mention “several academic success plans” but perhaps the reader won’t know what these are. Good luck!!

4

Ok thanks I fixed it, thank you

Dear Admissions Counselor,

I am currently on academic suspension, due to that fact that I could not maintain an adequate GPA, I am entreating for another opportunity to be readmitted fall of 2018.

I understand that it was my own negligence that created the circumstances for my dismissal, and I have worked hard to regain my credibility. Being accepted to xxx was a dream come true; I arrived ready to learn and have a close relationship with God. However, I found it difficult to adjust to life on my own as a college student. I come from a very sheltered home and, I recently had to learn about independence upon my arrival. I was seen as juvenile among my peers.

Since my Suspension from the university, I’ve grown closer God and, successfully transition into a responsible adult. I understand my past mistakes and learned to take responsibility of my academic failure and, talked to my loved ones, my pastor and a counselor on what lead me to be academically dismissed from school.

Before I became admitted, I researched what this university had to offer. I saw that this university had a variety of programs that they offered to students who wanted to improve academically which, fascinated my mother and I. My mother loved the idea of me going to a Christian school to grow closer to God and, lead me to the path of righteousness. Upon my acceptance, I was put on pre-provisional hold due to my SAT scores in Math, and English. I did well my freshman year and I started to find my way in school sophomore year and I started use the resources that this school had to offer.

By the end of my sophomore year you could tell academically that my grades were suffering, I had to learn about in-dependency the hard way; by finding a job, paying school loans, and taxes. Which took a toll. my peers began to notice, including my professors, I started to miss class regularly. I realized that my major, Athletic Training was not for me, I talked and emailed my advisor. I had to wait to change my major because it was too late in the semester, eventually I felt that everything was falling around me, and I gave up, which was the biggest mistake that I ever made.

I learned what I did wrong and what I could of done to avoid those mistakes, I have made several academics success plans since my suspension from college; my plans include; develop a time management plan that works for me and, To meet my academic advisor to discuss my schedule and develop a plan for success

and I’ve come to terms on why I failed. I made a promise to God, my family and Myself that I will not fail again and plan to succeed in the future. If I, am accepted for the upcoming semester I promise to make use of my time to be productive and responsible.

5

Ok thanks,

Dear Admissions Counselor,

I am currently on academic suspension, due to that fact that I could not maintain an adequate GPA, I am entreating for another opportunity to be readmitted fall of 2018.

I understand that it was my own negligence that created the circumstances for my dismissal, and I have worked hard to regain my credibility. Being accepted to xxx was a dream come true; I arrived ready to learn and have a close relationship with God. However, I found it difficult to adjust to life on my own as a college student. I come from a very sheltered home and, I recently had to learn about independence upon my arrival. I was seen as juvenile among my peers.

Since my Suspension from the university, I’ve grown closer God and, successfully transition into a responsible adult. I understand my past mistakes and learned to take responsibility of my academic failure and, talked to my loved ones, my pastor and a counselor on what lead me to be academically dismissed from school.

Before I became admitted, I researched what this university had to offer. I saw that this university had a variety of programs that they offered to students who wanted to improve academically which, fascinated my mother and I. My mother loved the idea of me going to a Christian school to grow closer to God and, lead me to the path of righteousness. Upon my acceptance, I was put on pre-provisional hold due to my SAT scores in Math, and English. I did well my freshman year and I started to find my way in school sophomore year and I started use the resources that this school had to offer.

By the end of my sophomore year you could tell academically that my grades were suffering, I had to learn about in-dependency the hard way; by finding a job, paying school loans, and taxes. Which took a toll. my peers began to notice, including my professors, I started to miss class regularly. I realized that my major, Athletic Training was not for me, I talked and emailed my advisor. I had to wait to change my major because it was too late in the semester, eventually I felt that everything was falling around me, and I gave up, which was the biggest mistake that I ever made.

I learned what I did wrong and what I could of done to avoid those mistakes, I have made several academics success plans since my suspension from college. My plans include; develop a time management plan that works for me and, to meet my academic advisor to discuss my schedule and develop a plan for success. I’ve come to terms on why I failed. I made a promise to God, my family and Myself that I will not fail again and plan to succeed in the future. If I, am accepted for the upcoming semester I promise to make use of my time to be productive and responsible.

6

A successful appeal must do several things:

  1. show that you understand what went wrong
  2. show that you take responsibility for the academic failures
  3. show that you have a plan for future academic success
  4. in a broad sense, show that you are being honest with yourself and the committee

Here are some examples:

http://collegeapps.about.com/od/Academic-Dismissals/a/Sample-Appeal-Letter-For-An-Academic-Dismissal.htm

Some of this is general, and some specific to your situation.

  1. search this topic on CC and you will see many other posts on academic appeals
  2. Make sure your letter states what the issue was that caused you to have academic difficulties. Give specific exaples?
  3. Did you talk to your professors/dean of students about the issue?
  4. Did you make use of the many resources your school has? if not, why not?
  5. Find out what those resources are…e.g. counseling center, talking to professors, talking to your adviser, withdrawing from class, talking to dean, maybe taking incompletes,
  6. State how you would use those in the future
  7. How are you addressing what caused the issue?
  8. Think about if you should continue at college, or take a break.
  9. Think about if you should continue at a community college
  10. How is your college funded? Will that continue?

In general, keep in mind what the college wants…they want students who can succeed. They need to know that you understand what the issue was, know now the resources that you can use, how the problems is resolved so you will not have academic issues in the future.