Rise and Shine, Butterfly!

<p>I hate to be that roommate who takes their and their roommate's rules by the balls and say, "This is what goes and this is what doesn't." But my roommate is backing me into a tight space. </p>

<p>First things first, we are two different people. She stays up until four in the morning, sleeps through her classes, and continues to do so until about three in the afternoon. I go to sleep fairly early...generally midnight the latest and wake up around eight in the morning. </p>

<p>I try to be quiet in the mornings. As much as I can. She sometimes does wake up and is passive aggressive about it. She will dramatically flail and huff about in her bed. These theatrics, in turn, makes me care less if I wake her up. Lately (as in the past two months), she slams the door when she comes in and allows people to come in the middle of the night to hang out and talk when I'm sleeping. (Last weekend they did this and essentially, I kicked them out.)</p>

<p>With her sleeping until the sun sets, when is a good time for me to be able to make "noise"? Such as turn on the TV, use my microwave, clean around the room. It's senseless and unfair to be tiptoeing about my room for the majority of the day when I'm coming in about of classes and trying to get work done. </p>

<p>So before I throw out all of my home-training and common sense and go Tanisha from Bad Girls Club Season 2 on her, what time would you guys say is a safe time?</p>

<p>well, i find it rather weird that she is sleeping in so late! my goodness! i wonder why she is at college anyway. I would talk to her when she is awake and tell her that it is your room as well. If she doesn’t listen and freaks out because you actually attend class and want to get work done then the next step is to talk to your RA. I don’t think there is a specific safe time, but you should clue her in on the fact that you have needs as well. Personally, I would just clean, use your microwave, and turn on the tv whenever you needed it within reason. If she freaks out and wakes up I would say " oh good you’re up. maybe you should go to class or something". </p>

<p>I would be okay with using the microwave (for food) or cleaning the room (for obvious health reasons), but I would not be okay with turning the TV on while somebody in the room was sleeping. If the TV was on (for weather, news, etc.), I’d have the captions on but not the volume.</p>

<p>I had a roommate who would go to bed around 10 each night, and wake up at 7:30. I was usually sleeping from 2am-11am. Sometimes you just can’t get sleeping schedules to line up. I would tip toe around at night, she’d be quiet in the mornings… either way, we each had ~4 hours when the other one wanted dark/quiet. Earplugs/headphones were used a lot. But just remember it probably annoys her as much as it does you.</p>

<p>Definitely try talking to her… don’t approach it in a “you are going to go to bed at midnight and wake up by 10” sort of manner, be friendly about it. Try to compromise. Let her know it bothers you to have to have the room so quiet so late in the day, see if you can find a solution you’re both happy with. If talking doesn’t help, try going to the RA about it.</p>

<p>Thanks for the responses, guys. </p>

<p>After a few more disrespectful shenanigans she pulled once she woke up, I have decided that I’m not going to compromise with her on this one. I’m not going to bring it up with her*. I’m going to throw out my home-training and say, “Screw it.” If she wales up, too bad. If I wake up, too bad. I have headphones, I have an eye mask. I’ll continue to use them.</p>

<p>

That’s the type of nonchalantness that I need to develop. I have been bending over backwards accompanying her, making sure she isn’t inconvenienced. Earlier today, I was starving. I had food in my dorm, but it had to be heated up so I snacked on pretzels for about an hour. :-< </p>

<p>*Talking does not work with her. She will be apologetic and caring during the conversation, and then the next half hour I hear her trash-talking the “roommate-to-roommate” talk. </p>

<p>the hardest thing to do is change your sleep schedule. or get anyone to change theirs so it better lines up with your own. so with the understanding that you guys are sleeping different hours and that’s probably not going to change you just have to use some common sense (and home-training? i never got any of that, im jealous) when it comes what committing acts of noise generation and accepting those same crimes from your roommate. so like the inviting friends over while you were sleeping was unnecessary. she knew it, you knew it. it was wrong. come on, don’t meet in the sleeping girls room! for your late night talking or whatever it is girls do late at night, do that somewhere else. but using the microwave is totally okay.she should accept it and your common sense should tell you to go right ahead. a kids got to eat! and to expect each other to plan their meals and meal preparations around the other peoples sleeping schedule all the time hardly sounds reasonable. unless you guys are super light sleepers or have issues with falling asleep after being woken up, or she lacks enough common sense to agree to something sensible, then there should be a way to work it out. otherwise, maybe there’s two roommates having the same exact issues as you guys, and you could move in the with the early sleeper, while she moves in the with the night owl.</p>