Hi,
I have a quick question about whether or not you guys think my essay is on the risky side?
I’m planning on writing about how the death of a close friend impacted my life and has permanently changed me and my perspective of life.
I plan to write more about the change in myself and only use death to show what caused it.
What do you guys think?
Thanks.
<p>wow, man thats serious stuff. I don't see why not. The essay is supposed to be about you and this topic seems to have really affected you.</p>
<p>Oh yah, one thing I forgot to mention. On
<a href="http://www.virginia.edu/undergradadmission/writingtheessay.doc%5B/url%5D">http://www.virginia.edu/undergradadmission/writingtheessay.doc</a>
it mentions</p>
<p>"But it is almost impossible, in 500 words, to write well about vast topics such as the death of a loved one (see excerpt: "the bad") "</p>
<p>and it says that a "bad" essay starts like</p>
<p>"From an early age, we accept death as the inevitable, but do not comprehend its actual denotation. Death is the impending future that all people must eventually grasp. In my early teens, my grandfather tragically perished. As a youth who did not identify with such a cataclysm I was saturated with various emotions. Initially, I was grieved by the loss of a loved one and could not understand why this calamity had to befall upon my family. I always considered death to have a devastating effect, but was shocked by the emotional strain it places upon an individual."</p>
<p>Thanks.</p>
<p>i think thats actually a common topic</p>
<p>we all die</p>
<p>I don't know, your opening sounds very scientific and withdrawn, maybe an a side effect of your friend's death, which is fine. However, I'm sure the AdComs get "death" essays all the time (Friends, Relatives). We've been doing essay readings in class and of 40 essays (from 20 people), 9 have been "death" essays. My favorite, was the least contrived with probably the lowest diction, however it was so honest and painful. When I say lowest diction, it is in comparison to the other essays that crammed SAT words into their stories. This other writer had varying sentence structure and highly efficient writing, but I could feel the pain in every word (and the author herself wasn't even reading it).</p>
<p>However, just the pain wasn't enough, since everyone deals with these sorts of things, and they can't all get in. So, she also did this fantastic segment showing what she learned in the most creative and heartfelt way that I want divulge since this is her essay.</p>
<p>I know I gave a lot already, but it's nothing really specific to the author or her essay. These are all just common tips. Anyway, basically, make this more personal. It really sounds like you're more obsessed with finding the next euphamism for death than actually conveying what you feel. </p>
<p>(Sidenote: But that's just me, and I could be completely crazy, who knows! Sorry I'm kind of blunt. I apologize if I've offended you. Be aware this is mostly my personal preference.)</p>