roomie doesn't want to meet before move-in

<p>so, here's the story:</p>

<p>im living in a triple and one of the two girls is in taiwan, so there's no way i could meet up with her before we move in. the other girl emailed me and said that she drives her brother to my town every couple of days for whatever reason so she suggested that we meet up. i was totally up for it. but also, in that email, she mentioned that she would be bringing her fridge, her tv, and was wondering if either i or the other roomie who's in taiwan would be willing to bring a microwave. i, however, was planning on not needing these items and i wasnt planning on using them. so i told her that, and told her that i wouldnt bring a microwave.</p>

<p>the thing is, she hasn't emailed me back. do u think she's offended that im not going to bring any appliances? i mean, its not like im saying, im not bringing these things but im gonna mooch off of you guys because that's not my intention at all! did i do something wrong?</p>

<p>I mean a microwave is pretty cheap, and not to say that you need to buy friends but Think of the microwave being a welcome giFT. lastly a microwave always comes in handy,once in a while.</p>

<p>i don't think you should buy a microwave if you dont have any intention of using their appliances.
money isn't exactly easy to get and keep in college, so don't feel that you need to 'meet your roommates halfway' about something you will not use.
explain yourself as clearly as possible and if that does not work then, like many have said, you dont need to be friends with your roommates.</p>

<p>but if you feel that it might be a good idea after all, go for it.</p>

<p>well, if you have the money you should e-mail her back and say that you managed to get 100 bucks together or whatever and will pitch in and buy it. if money really is a problem, or you'd rather buy jeans with 100 dollars, just explain when you meet at school that you're sorry about the microwave, but you had to use your money to buy schoolbooks & weren't planning on getting appliances...or something (this kind of explanation is in no means necessary, but it does seem nicer/more welcoming than not saying anything).</p>

<p>maybe there is something else you could bring, like an area rug or something, that might be cheaper and you'd appreciate as well. </p>

<p>(keep in mind though - although you might not think you'll want a fridge, microwave, or tv, chances are you will end up using all three at least once...so think about it before you decide to go the no-microwave route.)</p>

<p>i suppose going cold-turkey on the appliances might be hard, but i think its better in the long run for me. considering that any food or drinksin the room is actually the death of me and my goal to lose weight in college...so i think i'll just try out telling her once i move in</p>

<p>thanks guys</p>

<p>Contrary to what sarit_om says, I think it's a good idea to be at least on speaking terms with your roommates, especially in a triple with girls. From what I've seen, a triple of girls is trouble brewing. With three people living in the same room, there will be far less time when there's only one person in the room, so you'll have to be able to get along with each other.</p>

<p>Hey, I didn't say don't speak. I just said don't spend money for the sake of appeasement.</p>

<p>Jeparlefrancais: realize, though, that if that is the reason, the fridge she is already bringing might be tempting. If it's going to be there, you might want to have access to it just for your...fruit shakes... :)</p>

<p>I think you should e/mail her back and ask her if there is something else you could bring instead. Also, you may want to explain the situation about how the e/mail may have come across after you sent it. I always think it's best to clear the air. I really don't think she's mad, she just may be afraid to ask you to bring anything else at this point.....</p>

<p>a microwave is like 30~40 bucks at target
dun be cheap</p>

<p>what's worse? being cheap? or too poor to buy something you'll actually use?
in my opinion, its the latter. but you're entitled to yours.</p>

<p>If I were the one reading that email I would think you were cheap. I don't understand how you expect not to use a fridge, microwave, or tv while in college. I would just buy the microwave and tell the two other people that you should all split the costs of the appliances, because you will all be using them, whether you think you will or not.</p>

<p>do you REALLY think you wont need a microwave at all? common now honey, you must be kidding. so you wont ever need to heat up a bagel or coffee? </p>

<p>small microwaves are cheap (less than $50), just buy it. if shes pitching in something important, its only fair that you do too. and unless you dont have the means to buy a 50$ microwave (which i doubt, because between now and september you will probably buy something for around that same amount), then you really should.</p>

<p>my point is that i wont ever be needing that stuff, so i dont think i should buy any of those things. its not becuase i want to use those things and wont buy them, its bc i am not going to use them. and even if i needed to, i wouldnt use my roommates' bc thats just rude!</p>

<p>honestly, 40 bucks is not even a drop in the bucket considering tuition is 20k/year.</p>

<p>just suck it up and buy it</p>

<p>and it definitely isn't rude to be using ur roomates appliances if she gives you permission.</p>

<p>Bring a blender. Its more useful than a microwave anyway. Frozen Rum drinks beat popcorn any day!</p>

<p>Okay, I'm not going to argue the price of microwave or anything else, but just offer a suggestion..</p>

<p>Email her back and ask if she's still interested in meeting up. It may be that she hasn't got around to check her email or perhaps think you think meeting up is bad. Whatever the case, you should still try to get a hold of her to clear up the situation. I'm sure there is some appliance that you and roommates will want that you can bring. On a side note, don't buy a microwave right now, check out the situation first. It's possible that your third roommate in Taiwan has a microwave she can bring.</p>

<p>thanks for all ur suggestions, biting and not, but ive decided that im not bringing anything that i personally wont be using.</p>

<p>girls = drama</p>

<p>amen to that.</p>

<p>Why don't you offer bringing a toaster or a George Foreman grill? Or a vacuum or duster or something? This way it's a kind of compromise. You have to live with them for a year; rooming with others is always going to be a compromise.</p>