Roommate trouble

<p>Basically, my roommate and I want the same side of the room. She originally approached me and asked to keep her side, saying something about her liking to sleep facing the same way or something of the sort. Knowing that I wanted the same side, my friends told me to respond by saying that I'm the same way and then, because I'll probably be moving in first, just to go the first-come first-serve route. Instead, I made the mistake of telling her that was fine, thinking that if I were in her position, I'd want my roommate to do the same for me. It was dumb, I know. But I'm really awful at just pushing aside everything else, and making what I want a priority. Last year, I had issues with my roommate, due on my part to a lack of communication and this whole "Well, if I were in her shoes..." thing. I don't want to make the same mistake again, but I feel bad about going against what I said and, on top of that, I really don't want to start the year off on a bad note. She's a good deal nicer and more considerate than my last roommate, and she knows how much I struggled with my past roommate, but I don't think it'll be enough. The only two things I can think of that might help me is that I'm most likely moving in before her (she doesn't know this yet) and that I haven't sent her a diagram of how I'd been intending to change the room, to make it more comfortable for me (if that's a little confusing, I can explain it further--I was thinking I could make a really bad diagram that would make things uncomfortable for the both of us? loll). So I guess my real question is, do I just tell her that I want the same side of the room (which I'm leaning towards)? And if so, how? Preferably without making things super awkward or creating resentment. I just want us to be on good terms without having to sacrifice what I think is best for me, so any help would be greatly appreciated!</p>

<p>I’m confused, how are the sides different? As far as I know, all the dorm rooms at my college are pretty symmetrical.</p>

<p>The way I see it, I’ll let your roommate take that side of the room seeing that your roommate did call it first. Even if you move-in first, technically they already called dibs. And if the roles were switched, I would expect a respectful roommate to do the same for you.</p>

<p>Anyways, what difference does it make what side of the room you guys get? You’ll be living with each other for a while, try not to cause problems for each other…</p>

<p>edit: However, yes, bring this up to your roommate casually - it couldn’t hurt. Keep in mind though, that this is no big deal at all.</p>

<p>I think it’s a matter between you and your roommate. Don’t listen to your friends. It’s not a big deal. I had been living in a room that had 6 beds. Somehow I got the bed in the quiet corner of the room. But I did not find the person whose bed was near the entrance door unhappy at all. It was not a big deal for him.</p>

<p>Let her have it. I don’t see the big deal. Don’t start a war over something that is not important. You will have plenty of time to stand up for yourself.</p>

<p>really a disgusting situation, sry to hear that.</p>

<p>This is exactly why I rather live alone off campus than putting up with other people’s bull ***** to be honest.</p>

<p>Let her have her side. Who cares? Living with someone (and getting along in general) is really about picking your battles. This isn’t really worth arguing over - you might come to like your side of the room and you won’t have to upset her. Do you really want your year to be one pointless battle after another? Or would you rather give her some of what she wants so that when something comes up that really matters to you, she’ll return the favor? Unless there’s a monster living in the corner she doesn’t want to take, I’m sure you’ll be fine!</p>

<p>Since you already agreed to let her have it, let her have it. Then suggest to her that since you both want it, perhaps you could have it the second half of the year. Hard to argue with that.</p>

<p>You can mention something, but as the above poster says, you agreed to let her that side of the room. Not being able to speak up for yourself is not her problem.</p>

<p>Making this into a big deal could set the tone of your entire year. Not sure you want a cold roommate situation for something this frivolous.</p>

<p>And absolutely do NOT, do NOT just move in and put your stuff on that side of the room without telling her. That’s absolutely unfair, and she will hate you for it.</p>

<p>first get a single going forward, all dorm rooms should be singles (I.M.O.)
but you sound like you are fixing to butt heads with somebody you are going to live with! choose your battles in life wisely and do not let your " friends" egg you on!</p>

<p>You should definitely talk to her about it and not just move in where you told her you could live. If it will really bother you to be on the other side then definitely discuss it, it’s both of your room so you should both be comfortable and be able to talk about things like adults. But since you talked about it and told her that she could have that side of the room, just putting your stuff there since you’re they’re early could cause problems between the two of you for the rest of the year</p>

<p>I am really curious now: how is your room set up that it makes such a gigantic difference which side is whose? </p>

<p>I am used to dorm rooms with two identical sets of beds, desks and closets. For most rooms the differences are small: one person might have sun shining on their bed in the morning, or can arrange the furniture such that the desk doubles as a bedside table. I’ve only seen one room with two very unequal “sides.” The room was slightly larger than a regular single room with a small “servant room” attached. The servant room was precisely as wide as the bed and just barely long enough for a bed and a dresser. Every single year, roommates fought over who’d have to sleep in the closet and who’d get the regular room. I am not sure why the college didn’t just keep it a single.</p>

<p>You told her it’s fine, so that should be the end of it. Was it a mistake? Well that’s for you to decide, but it doesn’t change the fact that you told her you’re fine with it. </p>

<p>If you can’t manage to deal with what side of the room you’re getting, I cannot imagine what’s to come.</p>

<p>You shouldn’t go back on your word. Plus I really don’t see the point in caring which side of the room you get.
For me, the only reason I’d ever want a specific side of a room is because the cable hookup is there, and I’m generally the only person that brings a tv along.</p>

<p>Could you ask her if you could change sides at the end of the semester? Or ask for some other advantage to make things more equal in your mind, if in fact the sides of the room really are different in some meaningful way? For example, if her side of the room is roomier, maybe the microwave/refrigerator could be kept on her side.</p>

<p>By the way, what is different about the two sides of the room so that one is better than the other?</p>

<p>Try a different path. My roommate and I took a roommate compatibility assessment at [TTI</a> SURVEY](<a href=“http://www.ttisurvey.com///198211NND]TTI”>TTI SURVEY). It really helped me to understand her before the little things became big.</p>

<p>If it’s about sleeping a certain way (like be on one side and want to face the wall or something) can’t you just put your pillow at the other end? >.> Just a thought… The switching at the semester mark seemed like a decent idea. What makes this particular side so desirable.
Also, I’m moving in as a freshman this fall. Is there a side that’s typically better (ie: the side opposite the door?)</p>