<p>The title is kind of self-explanatory, but just to explain the situation a bit further:</p>
<p>I'm a college freshman right now and one of my old high school friends that goes to my college wants me to room with her next year. Last spring when we both signed up for housing for our freshman year, we agreed to not live together and instead get random roommates so we could meet new people. However, she got really horrible roommates and she doesn't want to take the risk again so she wants to room with me next year. She even asked me the second week of school and without much consideration, I said yes. As the housing application deadline is fast approaching, I realize what a terrible mistake I made in promising her. We have totally different lifestyles and I already know that if I don't drive her crazy first, she will drive me absolutely nuts. (And to be truthful, she does kind of drive me crazy even when we're not living together). I'm totally willing to do the random roommate thing again since my experience was much better than her's, but she's making it difficult for me to tell her that I don't want to room with her anymore. I tried dropping a few hints and even convincing her that I'm messy, sleep late, etc. but she won't listen because she's deadset against having random roommates again. She's already told all of our mutual friends and her parents that we're going to be roommates, and I'm not sure exactly how to tell her I've changed my mind without hurting her too much not to mention being a big fat promise-breaker. :-/</p>
<p>Seems like the only option is to be up front and apologetic. Bring up the things that make it so you can't see yourself living with her, and ask her if she doesn't see that too. Chances are there's plenty there for you both to see, and she's just not seeing that in comparison to her last experience.</p>
<p>Well, you pretty much have two choices: tell her you changed her mind, or just suffer for a while and then use experience to get a roommate switch. Right now, since it seems that she's very excited about it - and that you're sure that you're both going to hate it - maybe just a little patience and time will show her that you'd both be better off with a random roommate.</p>
<p>Thanks for the suggestions Student92 and Sabster.
I thought about living with her for a quarter, but I don't think it's worth all the hassle and risk of ruining our friendship. Telling her up front is probably the best way to go, but I really tried putting her in perspective and I guess if I were her, I don't see too many issues. But for me, I want a healthy distance between us (we're not even best friends) and I prefer living with strangers because I get more peace and privacy that way. I know...that sounds weird, but I never feel obligated to have conversations with my roommates and they're usually very respectful and courteous...something that some people forget and take for granted when they're with someone they're confortable with. And I guess there are other little things about her too that I don't want to deal with daily, so how's an un-harsh way to say "I don't want to live with you for personal reasons"?</p>
<p>You mean second week of the first semester?
Since you don't want to get down and dirty unless you have to....
Tell her you were too brash and didn't really think about what you were agreeing to. And now that you've had such a great experience choosing random roommates you feel terrible about breaking your promise but feel like it would be way too much of a disappointment to not do it again. Repeat again how sorry you are with a light joke that there's no way fate can deliver up such hellish roommates again. Even go on to suggest being lucky enough to grab a single (light jokes and suggestions trying to help her make it seem less like "You are doing this TO HER" and more "You are doing this FOR YOURSELF"</p>
<p>Haha. Yeah she asked the second week of first semester (or actually quarter) because she disliked her roommates that much. Thanks for the help! think I might be able to pull it off if I get her in a humorous mood first...</p>