<p>OK…our DD’s second choice school (but a VERY close second choice) offered her a HUGE merit scholarship…it would have cost us less than $10,000 a year to send her there. First choice school offered her $6000 a year AND was MORE than double the cost of choice 2.</p>
<p>She went to school choice number 1…even though it cost us more. If we had not intended to help her with these costs, we would NOT have allowed her to apply to the first choice school at all.</p>
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<p>Just curious mom2…why the reference to OOS for Fordham OR Villanova. These are PRIVATE universities…not state public universities. There is no “instate tuition and fees” option at either school. All student tuition/fees are the same regardless of state of residency.</p>
<p>Thumper, of course you (being you) intended to help her. But many people need to know the numbers before deciding. If Fordham had not offered this person the aid that they did, this would be a different discussion. That is why people need not only safeties, but financial safeties.</p>
<p>As a NMF, most kiddos have an opportunity for a full-ride scholarship at one of several schools that offer it. Our S was duly offered one at a U that we considered to be OK. He also received 1/2 tuition offers at two Us. We had really hoped he’d chose the full-ride but he selected one of the 1/2 tuition Us (he outright rejected school that didn’t offer any merit). He and we were very happy with his choice, even tho it had a pretty high COA. He had many opportunities at his U and was very happy there. He graduated in 4 years, was able to pursue many activities he enjoyed, was able to do research, help author and get several articles published, and had a job waiting for him after he graduated.</p>
<p>There was a significant difference in rigor and other factors between the school he attended and the school he was offered full-merit. I don’t know enough about the schools your child is considering to venture an opinion. It was a bit of a wrench to part with the $$ when S had received a full-ride offer, but we have no regrets.</p>
<p>FWIW, we did tell the school he wanted to attend that another competing U had offered slightly more and since finances were a factor for our family, wondered if they could match. They said they didn’t bid or match, but they did increase coincidentally his merit aid to be like the other U, which made our costs slightly less.</p>
<p>Kay, I agree with you. I guess I wonder what this family told their son BEFORE the applications were sent. If there was a price LIMIT for the family, it is my opinion that this should have been shared with the student BEFORE applications were sent, not after admission were received. If the parents were clear that money was a number one factor and they could NOT fund either school without sufficient aid, that is one thing. </p>
<p>And while this doesn’t relate to admissions…Our kids both knew that if they lost their merit awards at any point, they would be “invited” to come to our home state to a public university. At $10K per year and $6K per year, they didn’t fund the college costs fully but they were a significant contribution nonetheless.</p>
<p>We sort of had a similar experience. Child was offered about $20K to a good OOS and private Jesuit college. Dear child was offered no money from USC. Even after showing USC the other offers. We went with USC based on the small classes, great “network” and other hype with the school. Plan also was guarantee kids get out in 4 years. We told child, they would be responsible for $10 per year. Unlike what many others experience at USC, professors were mediocore, not compassionate at all, child was closed out of several classes, tutoring service was no help, internships have not panned out at all and it will take extra year to finish. Child knows several others in the same boat. If anything, I am bitter at the outcome and wish in hindsight he went to a school that offered him money or went to instate school in California. Unless you have the extra cash, I would go with the scholarship. Now next child overlapping with 5th year</p>
<p>I think the answer to this also depends on how much money the family has. If they can (relatively) easily pay the full cost at the first choice, then I think it’s sensible for them to do so.</p>
<p>Analogy: would you rather have a Hyundai Sonata for half price, or a BMW for full price? Your answer will depend on your personal circumstances.</p>
<p>With regard especially to larger Us, it may vary depending on what department/school a student is in – there are always better and worse profs at most Us (large & small). Also, at any U, there is no GUARANTEE that a student will graduate in 4 years unless the U explicitly promises it (we are aware of at least one U where they offer free tuition if the student needs a 5th year).</p>
<p>There are no easy answers and it requires a heart-to-heart, considering total family expenses, current and future. Good luck!</p>
<p>Hunt, I think the major difference with your analogy is that most people would not consider the spread (if there is even one) between Fordham/Villanova to be anywhere near the spread of BMW/Hyundai.</p>
<p>bh…this STUDENT sees Villanova as being like that BMW…personally I wouldn’t pay even 1/2 price for a BMW so it’s all perception.</p>
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<p>I really LOLed over that analogy as the gap between the schools is not only nowhere near as great, but also from what I’ve heard and seen, Fordham has a slight edge over Villanova.</p>
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<p>Then it is incumbent on the student to present a compelling case as to why Villanova is worth an extra $20k/year…especially when the differences seem so minor on the important parts that it doesn’t seem to justify the extra outlay of parental cash. </p>
<p>That or aggressively negotiate with Villanova to match/exceed Fordham’s offer.</p>
<p>You should also check the renewal provisions. Some scholarships are not a cinch to maintain, especially the very generous ones. From a hs perspective, a 3.5 seems trivial; could be a different story in college.</p>
<p>S feels Villanova is the more prestigious school…
He absolutely loved the school on his visit, thew second he stepped foot on campus, stated that this was the school for him…
We’re not wealthy, but with scrimping and saving we may be able to afford to send him to Villanova…
But leaving behind that $80,000 certainly is hard…
How can I force him to leave his dream school behind, and risk hearing about his regret the rest of our lives?</p>
<p>You can’t “force him” without those regrets. However, you don’t have to force him.</p>
<p>Bring him to Fordham, have him tour, talk to students and professors, attend classes, see if there’s an overnight program. He might love it.</p>
<p>It’s kinda like choosing a spouse. </p>
<p>Low maintanance but reliable.</p>
<p>High maintenance but fun. :)</p>
<p>Happy Vday. Be sure to do what you are supposed to do. ;)</p>
<p>I was also going to suggest an overnight if all possible at Villanova. I may get flamed for this, but Villanova has had a rep for rich (or at least very comfortable) preppy white kids. Fordham, while not cheap either, does seem to draw a more mixed student population and they do offer merit aid, which helps with those in the “make too much for aid, but can’t afford full pay” donut hole. </p>
<p>If you would have to scrimp and save for 'Nova, it may be worth it, but your S may not enjoy being the only one who can’t afford to go out frequently, or isn’t going to the Caribbean for spring break.</p>
<p>Our daughter went to a college that was mighty pricey…we are not rich by any measure or means. She never went on a Carribean cruise while in college and she never whined about it. I think this is a huge overgeneralization of students at expensive private colleges. Not every student goes on lavish vacations each spring break. </p>
<p>To the OP…what did you tell your son about college finances BEFORE he got these acceptances and the one scholarship? Were you willing to pay for either school before he got the big scholarship? Or did you tell him that finances would need to be a significant consideration?</p>
<p>Believe me, I understand where you are coming from. We told our kiddo we would allow her to attend the colleges she applied to but we would only fund four years. The school she went to cost us 3 times the amount it would have cost us to send her to the place where she got the scholarship. Yes, it was hard to leave that scholarship on the table…but we were able to and we did. If you are not able to meet the costs or your son understood that finances would need to be a top priority, I guess I would think differently of your options here.</p>
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<p>As others have noted, the analogy is flawed. But so is the general assumption that it “depends on how much money the family has.” A full pay family will likely want to ensure that value received is commensurate with price paid; indeed, that’s probably one of the ways they became a full pay family. Anything less would disrespect the effort that it took to earn and save that money. </p>
<p>Of course, at certain amazing levels of wealth, it might not matter; but that’s far beyond what it takes to be full pay. Even at the level of stratospheric wealth, it wouldn’t surprise me to see value-seeking, especially if that wealth was earned.</p>
<p>In this particular case, I agree with others. The universities are comparable, and it would be a poor decision to pay the extra $80k, as well as a missed opportunity for the student to learn an important life lesson.</p>
<p>It’s truly a tough decision. D3 sat here at the end of last April with a pro-con list that basically had Column A: Prestigious excellent school with lousy aid package, Column B: Less prestigious good school with full scholarship. We told her we would support whichever decision she made…but you all probably heard the sigh of relief when she decided to go for the one with the scholarship.</p>
<p>We had the exact same situation ,left 21k on the table per year to attned,wait for it…</p>
<p>VILLANOVA…and don’t regret it for 1 second…was her first choice,and loves everything about it…</p>