Scared

Parents Forum
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<p>Whenever I log on to College Confidential and read posts, I feel as if I stand no chance of getting accepted. Happens with anyone else?</p>

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<p>From your other posts, it appears you’re applying to Harvard and Yale.</p>

<p>You should be aware that most of the extremely well-qualified students who apply to these schools do not get accepted, because there are many more extremely well-qualified applicants than there are seats available.</p>

<p>Hopefully you realize this and have on your college list some schools where your stats put you well above the norm and where you are, therefore, almost certain to be accepted; and that you can afford and where you would be happy.</p>

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<p>I think it’s a pretty common experience! While CC can be intimidating, it is also helpful to have a reality check when applying to certain schools. Being a top student with great grades, test scores, and longstanding commitment to interesting ECs is simply not enough to be admitted to very selective schools. </p>

<p>D applied to 13 schools and was rejected by 8. It was hard enough knowing some of the schools were a long shot going in; if we had not been exposed to CC I think it would have been devastating. It prepared us to understand that lots of very talented students are out there and that not all of them can be admitted to their dream schools.</p>

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<p>Yes, it does seem like you need to be superman or superwoman to be accepted after reading CC. It isn’t that way at all. </p>

<p>Although not everyone on this board is like this, there are quite a few students and parents that have really high grades/scores and either need the hand holding or like to boast (and maybe with a little grade/score inflation) or both.</p>

<p>The top schools are very competitive to get into and you do need the grades, the scores and the ECs. You still get a very good education at other schools.</p>

<p>I have always believed that what you get out of your college experience is directly related into how much you put into it. So, don’t be scared, hang in there. Do the work and you’ll do fine, no matter where you go.</p>

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Applicants should know that it is not just a matter of qualification. It may be much more a matter of who you are. Literally. Are you a URM ? Are you a good athlete with strong academics? Did your parents attend the school that you are applying to? If yes to any of the above, then you can compete, for example, for the 58% of freshmen seats of Harvard 2011(?) entering class pool (which will probably be the same for 2012 entering class) of athlete/urm/legacy/international. If you are asian, then good luck. You need to basically be a super man or woman and need luck. you are competing for the minority seat ~40% or so.</p>

<p>Most applicants need to apply to a list of colleges that are safely below their stats and qualifications, and a few match and a few reach schools. Top 5 to 10 ranked schools are reach schools for everyone. Don’t count on these schools. When you have at least one school that is acceptable to you, then you are ok. Choose the best from those that accepted you in terms of prestige, cost of attendance, location, campus culture, etc.</p>

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<p>As was pointed out on the thread where that 58% was first quoted, the number is bogus. It assumes that athlete/urm/legacy/international statuses are mutually exclusive.</p>

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<p>No moreso than does any other unhooked applicant.</p>

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<p>It depends upon where you apply and what your competetiion is. The absolute top schools is a crap shoot because there are many, many people just as qualified as you who want in. At some schools, it depends on your intended major or department, for the same reason.</p>

<p>Don’t apply only to the top schools where you feel you deserve to be. Apply to other schools that are less prestigious but will still give you a decent education. Some of the smaller schools give wonderful opportunity for research and labratory time that you may not be able to get at the larger schools due to competition and limited access.</p>

<p>My kid is a top student but chose to go to a smaller school. Yes, sometimes she’s frustrated by some of the other students who are not on par with her intellectually. But she learns outside of class to go deeper into subjects, and it won’t hurt to be ranked number one in the class. Lesser rated schools aren’t a problem if you are self-motivated.</p>

<p>Also, I think it’s normal for high school kids to have those nightmares in which EVERY school sends a rejection. That isn’t gonna happen if you apply wisely!</p>

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<p>I think you need to realize that it is not a competition with a hierarchy of first to last, and admission does not convey that one person is higher on some hierarchy and therefore more valuable than someone not admitted.</p>

<p>In fact, acceptance at a top college can even be seen as having little to do with the individual.</p>

<p>Selective schools are looking for the best mix on campus. Mix of talent, mix of backgrounds, mix of personality, etc. It can really be about how you contribute to that mix, rather than whether you make the grade in some way. And you have no control over that.</p>

<p>Admissions is not just about grades and scores and EC’s either. There are intangibles and, as some people have put it, the process is “holistic.” </p>

<p>I don’t know anyone who feels sure of getting into Harvard and Yale, if those are schools you want to go to, and I can also assure you that once in, neither place is any kind of paradise, academically or socially.</p>

<p>I don’t know why you have that reaction to CC. Is it the “chance me” posts with scores etc? There are a lot of people here, parents and students, who write about struggles and insecurities, so maybe you just need to read other posts. :)</p>

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then you shouldn’t trust anything that is said or written. Go ahead and say the ignorant things as you wish. Your statement is bogus if you think others cn not read it in context and when Harvard reported their admission data they would’ve considered such overlaps … but then to what extent do you think such overlaps happen? Do people think there will not be any asian athletes? No. do you think most admitted asians are in unhooked category? Yes. You going around and claiming things untrustworthy if you are not given the raw data from which to derive … look buddy, say what you wish … it won’t change the fact that that 58% came from Harvard’s own report (according to Bay… hey anna’s dad, go check the sources before you shoot…).</p>

<p>They way colleges are doing admissions, each applicant competes within own pool of applicants, such as unhooked asians against unhooked asians, etc.</p>

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<p>When I recommend CC to friends, I tell them to just stay away from the Ivy threads for exactly the reason the OP states in their post.</p>

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<p>There were times last year when my son was applying that I just had to stay away from CC for a while b/c I became too anxious. And other times when the suggestions/advice fit my situation. As my son started college this year, I relied heavily on the Class of 2015 parents for moral support. Take what is useful and helpful and leave the rest…</p>

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<p>I think the important think about cc is to get in early, while you’re not in the throes of applications. Mid-sophomore year for parents is ideal. After the initial shock/discouragement wears off, you can glean a lot of good information to help you/yur student through the process as well as a reality check that forces you to look at schools other than HYPS (if that’s your inclination).</p>

<p>I have a friend whose dd is interested in musical theater, and I’ve been trying for a year to get her to check cc out because she doesn’t know what she doesn’t know. I’ve learned from soozie and amt and others about the trickiness of MT programs apart from regular college admissions. I fear she’lll be overwhelmed when the time comes.</p>

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<p>“I feel as if I stand no chance of getting accepted.”</p>

<p>That’s because you HAVE no chance at H. or Y., but accidents happen. (I think that’s the best way to approach them.) So it’s not just a feeling. But you shouldn’t be “scared”, because you already know what your (non)chances are.</p>

<p>Do you have a safety THAT YOU LOVE and that you CAN AFFORD? if you do, you have nothing to worry about.</p>

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Not to fan the flames, but that’s not so clear- at least, not to me. From what I can tell, the bar really does seem to be higher for Asians. (I’m an aging white guy).</p>

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<p>When you posted that bogus number last time, your faulty analysis was pointed out to you:</p>

<p><a href=“http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/13304315-post32.html[/url]”>http://talk.collegeconfidential.com/13304315-post32.html&lt;/a&gt;&lt;/p&gt;

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<p>You made a mistake. An intelligent person would accept that and move on. But apparently, you would characterize other people’s posts as “ignorant” rather than adjust your own thinking when it is pointed out to you that your logic is faulty. Unless you get past that intellectual blockage, you’re not going to do well, no matter where you go to school.</p>

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<p>This has been debated over and over on CC, and there is no hard evidence to support it. But some people seem to get enjoyment beating dead horses.</p>

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<p>There are likely LOTS of Asians - Hmong, Mien, Mongolian, Papua New Guinean, Kham, Uzbek, etc. who are URMs. </p>

<p>But it doesn’t matter. There isn’t a bar, but a steel-reinforced door. A few manage to squeeze underneath. But if you assume you have no chance, you’ll won’t be scared, you won’t be disappointed, and accidents happen.</p>

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<p>I’ve been trying for a year to get her to check cc out because she doesn’t know what she doesn’t know. I’ve learned from soozie and amt and others about the trickiness of MT programs apart from regular college admissions. I fear she’lll be overwhelmed when the time comes. </p>

<p>…I fell the same way about parents of students at our school! I learned so much on CC…my D is a freshman at Cornell & I really don’t think she would have gotten admitted if not for some of the application info I learned here. “they don’t know what they don’t kniow”…great quote!</p>

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<p>More like a sieve. (Emphasis added to both quotes below.)</p>

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<p>[Newsroom:</a> Facts for Features & Special Editions: Facts for Features: Asian/Pacific American Heritage Month: May 2011](<a href=“http://www.census.gov/newsroom/releases/archives/facts_for_features_special_editions/cb11-ff06.html]Newsroom:”>Facts for Features: Asian/Pacific American Heritage Month: May 2011 - Facts for Features & Special Editions - Newsroom - U.S. Census Bureau)</p>

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<p>[2015</a> Admissions Statistics](<a href=“http://ivysuccess.com/admission_stats_2015.html]2015”>ivysuccess.com is for sale)</p>

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don’t listen to this nonsense. the bar is higher for asian applicants in the top five (according to usnwr) schools or so. It is because of the comparatively higher academic stats of asian kids and the admission policy by many top ranked schools to form a large percentage of their class with athletes, URMs, legacies etc. these special groups are not a small portion of the class, but rather a majority of the incoming class (58% of harvard 2011 incoming class). asians are not URM. Asians are predominantly non Athletes. this annasdad claims that there is no evidence, but there is evidence everywhere. schools like caltech, which does not admit students based on URM status or athlete or legacy at the expense of sacrificing the academic qualification, the percentage in the class of asians is more than twice that in Harvard, Yale, Princeton, etc. This annasdad’s claim is completely bogus.</p>