<p>I don't think I've been so confused in my entire life. As of right now everyone I know is trying to pressure me choose a life career. I was so lost because I have no clue. It got to the point where I was like maybe I shouldn't even bother going to college. Of course now, I still decided to go to college but I have no clue where because I don't know what I want to do. And I know that I don't have to declare a major until my junior year but try explaining that to my parents. My dad is obsessed with me becoming a doctor, no matter how many times I tell him that I'm not interested. My mom used to tell do what you love but all of a sudden she's actually agreeing with my dad. And so does the rest of my family. I don't want to say that my family is racists but they think that it's better to become a doctor (or anything in the medical field) because it doesn't matter what color you are, you'll have a job. I can't say that I don't like the medical field because I never gave it a chance. But I still wish I could explain to my family without them jumping down my throat. I don't know what I want to do and I wish would accept it and move on. I also wish they wouldn't put so much emphasize on race but I can see where they are coming from. I also wish I could have one of those <em>lightbulb</em> moments and know what I want to do. Is anyone as confused as me?</p>
<p>Plastic!!! Okay, ask around you will get the joke...</p>
<p>Here is a trick, when people give you advice, say, wow that is an idea, I will have to think about that. Acknowledge the advice but make no commitment. </p>
<p>And, I would not want a doctor who didn't want to be a doctor, that would not give me much confidence.</p>
<p>You have lots of time. Just say, hey, I am doing my best, taking the classes, getting good grades. It makes it hard for me to focus on my school work with everyone so enthusiastic about my future. </p>
<p>As for deciding what college, that will become clearer later. And, it is also who accepts you. </p>
<p>I think if you aknowledge that they want the best for you, say, yes, I hear what you are saying, I will discuse this with my GC, that aknowlegment, (without necessarily agreeing) can go a long way. </p>
<p>I mean, maybe you would make a great doctor, or you could be just terrible. Its not just, hey, I am a doctor, its takes a passion for it, for the studying, and if it is something you are not interested in you will not do well.</p>
<p>And giving the medical field a chance is not a good enough reason to become a doctor.</p>
<p>I read the Carribean thread, and I know exactly how you feel. One of my grandparents is Haitian, but other than that, my parents were both born in W. Africa, and they also think that the only successful career you can have is to be a doctor. They've been saying that ever since I was little, and I really like to help people. Of course, they knew that, and they took hold of that, and made it seem that the only way I can help people is to be a doctor. The only problem with that is that I'm not passionate about the sciences at all. I managed to tell them that I don't want to be a doctor, and they are just now finally kind of letting go of the idea...after four years later. </p>
<p>Now they are moving in on the law profession for me, but I also don't want to be that. I haven't outright told them that,though...I'm kind trying to wean (I'm not even sure if that is the proper use of the word, sorry if it isn't) them into the idea gradually. I think it is working, because just a few weeks ago when the Harry Potter book came out, my dad suggested that I should be a writer. A few years ago, his considered writing not a very good profession, but it seems like he's gradully becoming more open-minded. We still disagree on which colleges I should apply to; I told him I won't show him my list until the fall of 2006, and he seems to understand that. Hopefully, he won't freak out at my choices. </p>
<p>In other words, yes there is someone out there who is as confused as you are. Keep in mind, when you go to college, you won't have to choose your major when you get there, you can take some courses and see what interests you. I see where your parents are coming from; they don't want you to be discriminated against when you start working, but you still have to go with your passion. I agree with citygirlsmom, I wouldn't want a doctor, who didn't want to be a doctor. Take the required science courses at your school, spend a day at the hospital and see if you like the atmosphere of it, do research etc.. and if you really don't like those things, then maybe you will have more reasons to present to your parents, why you do not want to be a doctor. I knew I did not want to be in the medical field, when I attended a medical program from the Duke TIP program last year. Everyone was really having a great time dissecting brains, seeing the dead bodies, reciting the parts of the heart...and I realized I wasn't having a good time, even though I did muster up some enthusiasm for show. I told my parents about it, and they realized that I did not truly want to become a doctor. Maybe your parents will graduallly accept it if you find that you do not have to be a doctor.</p>
<p>I definitely understand you, dacoffeebean. I'm in a similar situation but with a twist. I actually have wanted to be a doctor. I can see myself in a career that caters to my interest in science and allows me to meet people. But, as I'm getting older, learning more about the profession, and learning more about myself, I'm starting to think that I should not choose a career this early, or at least a specific career path. There are number of interests, such as travelling, teaching, writing, researching, maybe joining the Peace Corps or TeachforAmerica, that I want to pursue before committing to being a doctor. I'm young. I love life. I want to experience life before I take the proffesional route, something I think that my family will have a hard adjustment. Yes, there is still a part of me that is interested in attending med school and getting an m.d. degree, but not directly after college before I can try other passions and TRULY decide where my future is headed.</p>
<p>Although my family does not blatantly pressure me to be a doctor since it was known that I wanted to be one by my own intention, I feel that my family will be dissappointed if I don't become one or follow the direct traditional road to become a doctor. All Haitian families, or really any family, want their children, nieces, nephews, etc. to be succesful, to bring their family pride. What better way to do that than to bring a doctor? </p>
<p>Don't worry, though. The great thing about family is they will accept nearly anything you decide if that's what you really want. It'll take time and serious convincing, especially with immigrant families. But, do what you love.</p>
<p>my mom keeps pressuring me to become a nurse (GAHH!! my family is already FULL of medical people. sometimes being filipino...) i really hate the prospect of being something in the medical field. i can't stand it. what i really want to do is astonomy/astrophysics, but i know she's eventually not going to let me. she won't support me in doing what i want, becuase she wants me to do something that has a big, steady income so that i don't have to worry about money. i mean, that's a good idea and all. but astonomy is the only thing i'm good at, and i hate that she can't support me in it. it won't bring in the same money that being a nurse or doctor can, but at least i'll be doing something i love, right?</p>
<p>i totally get how you feel. i'm so confused about what i want to do. do i do something that earns money and gives me financial stability that i dislike or not care for, or do i do something that i love but won't have such financial stablility? argh.</p>
<p>Before my dad left to go to Haiti for a 2 week vacation, he had the impression that I actually wanted to be a doctor. He probably felt like he actually got through to me. I mean my uncle (on my mom's side), whose a doctor, gave me the SAME speech. I mean pretty much word for word. I'm sitting there like you can not be serious. I have nothing against doctors. Nothing. But I can not imagine spending so many years studying to do something to please someone else. So I told my mom and she actually understood. So that's cool. But now my dad's back and everything is really peaceful. So I don't want to start WW3 and end up with my dad not talking to me when we just started "bonding". I think this steams from his dad telling all his sons to become doctors. The other 3 listened a become doctors and my dad followed his heart and became an engineer but doesn't even work on his degree. He's a bus driver. I'm really proud of my dad but I know he hates his job but he provides for us. And I think my dad just doesn't want me to struggle. BUt he has to understand that I don't want to wake up and dreading to go to work.</p>
<p>screw what your parents want you to be. its your life.</p>