Senior Scared About Future

Student Lounge College Life
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<p>I will be a senior this next year at college, and will be graduating in a year. Unfortunately, I'm struggling to maintain a positive attitude and simply want to withdraw from the semester temporarily, go back home, and deal with my mental "crisis." </p>

<p>No matter what I do, how many counselors I speak to, or etc., I simply cannot force myself to want to grow up--that's basically the gist of the situation, at least. I do not feel prepared for the real world, and am quite certain I won't be able to find a job within a few months due to my academic track record (numerous medical issues, etc.). Would it be better to take a semester long break, recoup, and return to college with more drive and purpose? Or would this be equivalent to running away from my fears and problems? I'm simply not sure how well I will be able to do in the coming semester, and have been anxious, panicked, and worried for months. Judging by my previous grades and even an F both in the last fall and summer semester, it will take a bit to get back to where I can fix my GPA. What would you recommend from your own standpoint?</p>

<p>I should add that my parents are not aware of just how much is going wrong with my life (grades, mental state, etc.), and would most likely transfer me to a university in their location to keep me under their watch for the remainder of my education. Unfortunately, this university is not quality education for my major, and I'm not happy about that option. I have had to withdraw from the university before due to medical problems, and am not sure just how helpful a semester break would be if I end up jobless and bored--although I could at least stay active through volunteering, dealing with medical problems, and perhaps getting a better counselor for my anxiety/worries. Thank you!</p>

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<p><— hey check it out.</p>

<p>I would stop talking to therapists and start talking to career advisers. You sound like you need a moment of success and a little bit of confidence. Focus on the semester, hang out with friends, keep active, and find a way to pitch this to a recruiter, explaining how you overcame the difficulties you’ve faced, and demonstrate that you can sustain your mental well being.</p>

<p>also, if you’re seriously depressed, maybe it’s a better idea to take some time off (not a whole semester though) and talk to a real doctor.</p>

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<p>Honestly, if you’re not doing well in the first place why does it matter what “quality” education you’re receiving if you’re not making the grades? They don’t give props to someone at Harvard who has a history of bad grades over someone at Somewhere State U who got good ones. I would say the exception is for engineering jobs or maybe applying to graduate school (a little bit) but not really anywhere else. But not if you have F’s. </p>

<p>I really don’t think so, though. I mean, didn’t you have this summer off? It was practically a whole semester. Retake the F’s. If you really need to, take a medical leave of absence. But during that time don’t sit around and worry, get yourself together because there are plenty of people who struggle with the same issues you do and succeed regardless. It’s only getting tougher the longer you prolong your entry to get a job in the market. Most of the people in my high school class graduated college already are either in grad school or working their jobs. </p>

<p>And by the way, there is going to be a job for a college graduate. Don’t tell me you can’t get a job at Wal-Mart or some minimum wage job until you get back on your feet in your search for a real job. Why sit around and do nothing when you can be earning something at least? I swear, my girlfriend’s brother earned an Ivy education and is sitting on his butt doing nothing unless he says it will have something to do with his degree. Living with his parents at 25! You should not have this sense of entitlement going in a field where people have years of experience on you and you need to gain some experience in the first place whether that is working a few years in a job you don’t like or whatever there is for you to do. Don’t come out expecting to make an $80K salary unless you majored in something extremely marketable. </p>

<p>The way to get in a positive frame of mind is to identify your goals. If you already know what you want to do with your life, what is stopping you? Where is your passion? I admit that I’ve gotten burned out taking a lot of high unit semesters, but I still thrust myself into the deep end and made the choice of whether to sink or swim. I’ve had plenty of life-threatening medical problems pop up, especially for over a year I went to doctors that had trouble diagnosing what was wrong with me. I got through a Calc 2 8 week class with pneumonia! </p>

<p>I remember being 18 and telling my psychiatrist/psychologist whoever the hell all my worries and whatnot. It wasn’t very helpful and she couldn’t help me besides get me tested at UCLA for Asperger’s. Of course it turned out that I have it, but it has not stopped me from getting anything I really want in life. This depression shouldn’t stop you from doing anything either and I’ve definitely been through depression. I’ve been there on the edge and I’m going to tell you that you need to worry a little but you can’t let it rule your life. </p>

<p>If you honestly think that taking a semester off is going to improve yourself, you better not be bored, lol. You need to be proactive about getting your life on track or you’re just going to end up where you started. Really focus on improving yourself and write your goals down. Volunteering in my mind isn’t really going to help you out. Do a lot of reading, think about your future goals and how you’re going to achieve them (not how you’re inadequate to take them), exercise a lot, and socialize a bunch. Don’t stay in your house and fume over your issues…that’s counter-productive.</p>

<p>If you ultimately decide to go back, realize what you have to do. You need to give 110% in your classes. You can get get A’s. It is not so much the intelligence that goes into it, it’s the hard work put into it that earns you the grades!</p>

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<p>As much as I wish it would, it’s not something that I can easily make go away. It’s pretty much destroying my motivation entirely right now. Self-discovery through reading, etc. probably won’t help me as much in a semester break as perhaps being more involved in life in general–even if that requires a therapist, volunteering, reconnecting with old friends, or other events.</p>

<p>The problem is that I already devoted so much time and effort to the more difficult school, and the lower GPA would definitely look more positive from a better school than from the worse school. I won’t remain at my present school if I can’t hack a decent GPA, but returning to the worse (MUCH lower ranked than a state university, and especially lower ranked for my major) school will net me a low (remember, senior) if better GPA and a diploma with the worse school name on it! :(</p>

<p>Yes, I would accept a job at Walmart, but unfortunately have applied to numerous jobs of the same sort currently and cannot get a position. My lack of work experience, and my lack of extracurriculars due to medical problems, makes my job applications look terrible. Even if GPA played an important factor in getting hired for grocery store jobs, I wouldn’t shine in that particular field. I have also heard that college graduates are less likely to get minimum wage positions, because employers believe they will leave as soon as a better job presents itself, which is a decent and realistic worry.</p>

<p>My worry is that every single year I have told myself that I will improve and will better my situation, but my personal and medical problems have made this a huge barrier, and continuing down this trend until graduation may be a mistake? Because I cannot graduate this summer as planned, my options are becoming more and more limited. I would love to take fewer courses and balance life, re-motivation, and classes more reasonably, but unfortunately cannot afford to do so on a financial level.</p>

<p>I’m sorry if this post sounds very defensive, but I was a bit put off. I’m sure many, many individuals can handle life and medical problems and succeed, but that does not mean I’m one of them! This is why I am asking for advice, and considering my options. Thank you, all.</p>

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<p>While I can understand what it is like to deal with medical problems and depression, I do have to say that I think most of your problem is too much time focusing on yourself. Get off your rear end and go learn about people who really have it bad in life. Volunteer at a hospital, homeless shelter, food pantry, teach reading to illiterates, take care of sick animals…just go do something that isn’t about YOU, and you may find yourself in the very process! I watch shows like “Celebrity Rehab” and think all the time that the celebrity’s main problem is that they don’t have anything really important to do in life, and they know it. I mean, really, when it comes down to it, looking good, singing, acting, playing sports, they are all meaningless when it comes to helping people live a better life somehow. If you are lacking work experience, go out and build a resume filled with volunteering meaningfully, not just here and there. That volunteer committment may show strongly and encourage an employer that you can commit to a job too. You can develop a lot of skills volunteering, as well as use much of the knowledge and skills you are trying to develop in college. If you graduate, and can’t find a top job right away, perhaps you can end up working for the organization you volunteer for, you never know. Just get out there, and show yourself that it really isn’t all about you…it’s what you can do for others much less fortunate than yourself. It will make your problems seem much less troublesome, that is for sure!</p>

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<p>You are going to be a senior? Many colleges will not give you a diploma if you didn’t do the majority of your major credits with that school, so you may not really be able to change schools just for senior year and expect to still graduate on time. If your GPA is good enough that you haven’t been alerted about SAP or put on academic warning or probation, then I would just focus on finishing the strongest you can. In many fields, no one cares what your GPA is. Some careers do care. You will just have to know enough about yourself to get help when you have questions or concerns, and put your efforts into doing the best you possibly can.
When you were a kid at home, did your parents do everything for you? Did they give you the message that you couldn’t handle things due to your illnesses or whatever? I believe that parents who give their kids the “can do” message have kids who are confident and “can do” anything… I feel badly for kids who were babied or had everything done for them, because the underlying message is that they are incapable of doing for themselves. Growing up is tough, not every day goes by smoothly in adult life, you may struggle at times, and other times will be joyous. Life is what it is. Have friends, gripe and complain together when you need to, cheer each other on, share expenses when you can (like, sharing an apartment after graduating instead of trying to afford one alone), and just enjoy life. You only get to enjoy it once, afterall! In the end, it’s not about having the best job, or best car, etc. As long as you have some sort of roof, food, and are happy, the rest will be extras, but not imperative to a happy life!</p>

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<p>story of my life. I moved back with my parents because I’m graduating 1 semester early, and didn’t want to sign a year long lease. After a week, I’ve realized that I need to move out of here immediately… they really don’t understand they’re driving me crazy right now…</p>