Severe Anxiety...?

This is my first post on this forum. I’m not sure if i’m in the right category, so my apologies in advance. I don’t know where to start. I am seventeen years old. Starting at a very young age, around five maybe, I started having severe panic attacks. I finally got diagnosed with generalized anxiety disorder. On top of that, I’ve dealt with depression and severe emetophobia. Emetophobia is the intense fear of vomit and anything pertaining to it. I have had that my whole life. It seems that something is always going on in my life. I am a great student, I have always had amazing grades. I went to preschool, a public elementary school, a public middle school, all of which I struggled through anxiety-wise. My first day at a public high school was horrible. I suffered so badly. I came home and said to my mom, “I want to kill myself. If you weren’t home, I would’ve done it.” She pulled me out of that school the next day. Mind you, that high school had probably less than 1500 students but I couldn’t handle it. I ended up at a tiny school, with about thirteen students. It has changed my life. My anxiety is still horrible, and so is my emetophobia. My depression has been okay. Anyway, I am so ahead in credits that I am enrolled in a community college class starting February 3rd. I agreed to it. Now, I am having severe regrets. I know I can’t handle it. I’m beating myself up over this, badly. I wanted to become a radiologist or something high up in the medical field, despite my phobia. My anxiety gets so bad and makes me forget almost everything, and I feel so physically sick all the time. I am just so stuck right now. Does anyone have any advice for me? I really don’t know what to do. I really appreciate it.

Are you seeing a therapist to help you cope with anxiety? Cognitive behavior therapy is very successful in overcoming anxiety and panic.

The comedian and actor Steve Martin writes about suffering from anxiety in his memoir, “Born Standing Up.” Also, Scott Stossel’s book, “My Age of Anxiety” is available in many libraries. He is a nationally known magazine editor who lives with anxiety.

Many people can reduce anxiety symptoms by learning about the disorder through reading, receiving therapy, and/or taking medications. Since you’ve been diagnosed, I imagine you’ve already been referred for some help. Make sure you follow up with that.

There are strategies you can use to help relax about your new class beginning Feb. 3rd. First of all, speak to the teacher beforehand. Many people are receptive and understanding about anxiety. Years ago I was on an airplane. Before it took off I mentioned to the flight attendant that I was a bit anxious. A few moments later there was an announcement over the intercom asking me to come up to the front of the plane. The pilot greeted me and introduced me to the co-pilot! They told me about the route we would be taking, what to expect in terms of weather, etc., and they told me some about the particular plane we were in. It was really helpful. Maybe the college professor will do something similar for you! Tell the professor you may have to step out for a few minutes if things get too rough. She’ll understand.

On Youtube there are some good relaxation videos/soundtracks. Just search for relaxation, or meditation. You could do one of these for about 20 minutes, before class begins.

Wishing you the best in addressing this. I’m confident you can greatly reduce much of your anxiety!

First of all, your not the only one. You’ve probably heard that line before, buts its actually true. No one is exactly like you and never will be, but you have a few things in common with them. I think that everyone has social anxiety and everything but in some more severe and only few express it. It’s a good thing you have your mom, many people can’t even trust their family with anything or some parents actually don’t care. YOU ARE PERFECT THE WAY YOU ARE! In every way possible! You were made this way, because there’s nothing wrong with you.
Prove the world and yourself wrong by going up and beyond and over coming everything. Just pray and ask for guidance. I think your mom can really help, she’s there for a reason. I really know that you can do it with all of my heart and soul. You’ll be looking back on your years and inspire others by sharing your story. YOU CAN DO IT!!

I song that can maybe help you out is “Need You Now” by Plumb. It helps me out.

Thank you, everyone. It is hard for me to specifically reply to everyone because I am on mobile right now. I have been seeing a therapist since I was seven years old and I believe I have been on medication since then, too. I also go to psychiatry. I just feel like nothing is helping. I really internalize it. I wish I could explain what exactly I’m thinking. I can’t seem to put it into words. I used to want to go to college so badly, but now that reality is setting in and it’s less than a week away, I want to turn back. I just don’t feel like it’s the place for me. I will also be mad at myself if I don’t go. I feel like a failure…

Will be “mad at myself if I don’t go.”

@rachsaamanthaa Really hoping that you are able to give it a try. Maybe you could ask a friend or a family member to go with you to the first few classes to see if you are able to get comfortable with it. Again, teachers usually are willing to make accommodations.

Okay, ready? Just take deep breaths for a minute.

I would suggest just going to the class and sitting in with no expectations. The nice thing about this class is that if you go, and decide it’s too much, you can drop it without any penalty. So it’s to your benefit to try it out, check out the feel of the class (sit in the back if you don’t want people to notice you). If you decide to drop it, then it’s no big deal.

Thank you everyone who has commented. I am actually sitting in a class of my friend’s with her. I’m not doing work obviously because it’s not my class, and it’s giving me severe anxiety. I just want to leave but I can’t.

If it is sitting in the class that is triggering the anxiety, you might consider online courses. There may be options for some schools to do quite a few or all of the classes online. Or perhaps you can find a way to combine online with the hand on classes (labs) if they are required. You might find that classes where you are actively doing something…not just sitting there, don’t trigger the anxiety as much. Another option might be a very small school, with very small classes.

Thank you.