Sexual Abuse

<p>Hi all,</p>

<pre><code> So this is going to be quite a wordy post given my rather abrupt title. It's pretty difficult for me to write it because it seems like I'm sharing too much of myself but this is an anonymous post and it's important for me to say this.
</code></pre>

<p>I've always loved school and over the past couple of years, I've developed a great interest in international relations and politics. I'm really interested in social justice as well- I've held a number of campaigns, raising over 40,000 dollars for various NGO's and issues I'm passionate about. I know about 7 languages; I've started my own non-profit. I've been interviewed on tv, in newspapers, magazines, radio,etc. I was also a straight A student, with about 8 AP classes( to date) and 7-10 honors classes. And needless to say, I love Georgetown.</p>

<p>However, this past year, just a number of things happened. My parents got to the brink of divorce, I got pretty sick but, most importantly, I was sexually abused. Okay, I said it and it's not so hard for me to type it out now because it's there, in written type but okay, I don't want this to become a sad, pity party while I wallow in my misery because I have so much to fault for. I said that, okay, I wouldn't let it get to me and I did- and that's fine, because for me, its a really big deal. Other people can get over things like that but I'm not that strong. But I let myself wallow in misery and depression for months. I cut off all my extracurriculars, I stopped going to school and I would just sleep- the only place I could make up dreams and not have to face everything. It seemed like the world was just moving so fast, everyone was going and going and I was just stuck and I had no control over my life. I would get so mad, so sad when I would see people in books, tv- eveything!- mocking me- telling me that you can do it, you can get over it- you have to be strong and brave and courageous and I was so frustrated because I couldnt. I wasn't like those people who faced their hurdles and got over it- I was stuck in a mire of self loathing-actually, that sounds pretty nice but it wasnt that. I was stuck in ambivalance and it was the worst feeling- I didnt' feel strong emotions- I was just stuck, stuck in myself, in a lull that just stuck and wouldnt go. I was like this for months-needless to say, my grades dropped to C's and B's and I didnt' care. I let myself go. </p>

<p>I said that I had started my own non profit; months before, my team and I had spent months planning a trip to visit one of our sites in Ghana. We had won grants and the trip was finalized- so I went. I had even put together a half-hearted schedule. I wanted to go so badly- so I could get away from this sickness that was eating away at me, slowly. So I went. And I learned. Many of the girls we worked with came from homes where they were abused, and exploited. Many of them had even been sold into the slave trade and had come to the place where we worked as a safe refuge. We would film them, capturing their stories and we would sing songs with them. Sometimes we would dance and other times, we would cry together. We held workshops for them- public speaking, self defense,etc. When I saw these girls- who came into the room laughing, joking, smiling shyly at times but always happy- I would look at myself in amazement. I looked at where I was, in this heartland of Ghana, surrounded by slums and dirt, and think that these girls were amazing. I looked at their lives and I found myself renergzied again- the passions I felt so much for- poverty, economics, foreign policy,etc.- came alive again. I found a reason to keep working- to keep doing what I had built up in the last couple of years. It wasnt useless or meaningless- we gave these girls books, school supplies, enough money for their orgnization to continue giving them lunch for another year but more than that, we gave them a medium through which to connect with other girls around the world. The last night I was with the girls, surrounded by their kisses( sometimes on the but for the little kids who were so tiny they couldn't reach my waist) and hugs, I thought that I can't give up. I finally found that 'thing', whatever it was, that I was so jealous of of those people i saw in the movies, tv, in my own life. I was so jealous that they could move on with their lives- andI found a little bit of that. It's not something you find and then you're okay for the rest of your life. It's a day to month to week battle- but I love life not simply for all that it can give me and show me, but for all I can do. I've lobbied with senators-maybe, I can BE that senator. Center for Strategic and International Studies. Institute for International Relations. UN department level jobs. Whatever- but I've found that voice again and I want to work on behalf of women who have been sexually exploited. For Human trafficking. It's an issue that's silenced because it's taboo. It's shameful- It's so extremely hard for me to even write this, even as I know this is anonymous. And that's where my question to you all comes in. If you have even bothered reading all of this, well, I want to go to Georgetown. There is just too much about it I love to list it here- I've loved the school since I was a freshman! But I know, given my academic record, my chances are slim to none. There's a section where you can explain certain circumstances- but well, I don't know whether it is appropriate or not to share what happened to me with the college. I know, didn't I just say that sexual abuse needs a voice? I've already started a campaign on female empowerment issues and dialogue but is this something that I can share with college admissions? I dont want them to see this as a pity factor. Despite not being myself, those two C's and 5 B's were grades I earned regardless. What can I do? I'm doing great this semester as far as grades are concerned( yay gov class!) and I've earned a lot of my trust back but no one knows what really happened to me- they think I was sick for a long period of time and when I speak to them, to their face, I can't bring myself to tell them something that I myself wouldn't know how to react to. But I love Georgetown and I just don't know what to do. Is this something that I can share with college admissions or am I crossing the line? Should I tell my counselor before she writes my college reccomendation letter? What should I do?</p>

<p>Thank you.</p>

<p>Any responses? Please.</p>

<p>I would say you have an amazing (if sad) story to tell. And your knowledge of that many languages and your involvement with international concerns, especially through arranging that trip to Ghana, makes you seem a perfect fit for Georgetown.</p>

<p>What happened to you is unfortunate, but it has clearly played a role in who you are today, and it’s caused you to make some important realizations about the rest of the world. I personally would think you should tell your counselor about it just so they are aware of how to explain your GPA drop. However, maybe leave out the more personal details. I think you might elaborate on that in an essay possibly if you think you can put a positive spin to how it has affected you.</p>

<p>Anyway, that’s just my opinion. I’m only a senior, so it might not be the soundest advice, just what I think.</p>

<p>I think you have a great chance of getting in. Good luck!!</p>

<p>I definitely agree with hannahmontana, you have dealt with an incredible number of difficult issues that few teenagers will ever have to face and it is only normal that you underwent a period of stagnancy after something so terrible happened to yu. </p>

<p>I think you should definitely inform your counselor of what happened to you and maybe even call (or have your GC call) the admissions dept and explain why your grades suffered during that time. You definitely have a story to tell–beyond just the horrible experience itself but what you’ve done as a result of it to try and overcome it.</p>

<p>Lastly, college stuff aside, I’d really like to say how much I admire and respect what you’ve done to overcome your incident–as someone who has worked personally with victims of sexual, physical and domestic abuse, I definitely understand that there is no easy solution and no simple way to “get over it”. Don’t give up on your dreams, even if you don’t get into Georgetown–you seem like an extraordinary person.</p>

<p>Georgetown_Gal,</p>

<p>I debated whether this may be more suitable for a PM, but I feel as though many people who have experienced sexual abuse find it difficult to admit, even online, so I figured I may as well post for their benefit as well.</p>

<p>I, too, was sexually abused. Raped, more specifically, 16 months ago, right after I graduated High School. I’ve posted before in these forums that I chose not to go to college immediately for financial reasons, and yes, that was part of it - but deep down I know American University would have worked with me. The majoritive reason was that after I was raped, I immediately bottled everything. I refused to feel it or deal with it, and it festered. Then, in July, it exploded into something similar to what you describe - listlessness, vague depression, and I had a little paranoia too; I must have taken 5 pregnancy tests and gotten tested for every STD known to man (the person who raped me was also a convicted felon). I guess what I’m trying to say is: don’t blame yourself for reacting the way you did. It’s totally normal; it’s part of the process. If it’s any consolation, now I just hate the <em>censored.</em> :)</p>

<p>Now, on to the question.</p>

<p>There’s no reason to exclude your struggle with sexual abuse from your applications. It’s estimated that 1 in 4 women will experience sexual abuse in her lifetime; it’s not like there’s a stigma. In fact, demonstrating that you have faced and overcome extreme adversity will probably look GREAT on your application. You’ll want to ensure that you do it concisely, of course, to further indicate that you are no longer affected by the incident.</p>

<p>As a side note, I would highly recommend seeing a counselor. There are probably a lot of emotions and memories that you’ve buried, and it’s best to get those out before you start college. If it’s at all possible, I further recommend that you try to pursue legal action against the person who did this to you. It’s unlikely that you will be his last victim; sex offenders tend to be repeat offenders. If you need ANY help with this, or you’d like to talk, please feel free to PM me. I, too, have determined that as part of my recovery I should help other women with theirs.</p>

<p>And, regarding Georgetown, I stayed on campus there for 2 weeks during my Senior year of High School - it’s an amazing school with amazing students. Great choice. :)</p>

<p>I am so sorry. All my condolences, and I think you def. have a shot --you’ve come so far. </p>

<p>Best of luck.</p>

<p>My condolences and if you can parlay that story iunto an essay as well as you did here I wouldnt worry about those grades, the adcoms will see past em.</p>

<p>Good luck, I think you have a pretty good chance. I’ll be praying for you.</p>