<p>My medmal specifically asks do I communicate with patients using email, every time I renew. It’s on a list of about six questions, along with several other very high risk practices. I do not. </p>
<p>Many years ago when I worked for a big hmo I got an ominous voicemail from a patient about something she was going to do, while I was on vacation. No one else had access to the voicemail, and I don’t know how the patient got it. Turned out okay, but pretty scary. </p>
<p>
</p>
<p>Undoubtedly, but my point is what colleges say they will do for students with disabilities is not matched by what they actually do.</p>
<p>Fang Jr. took a summer class at Stanford two or three years ago. Their disabilities office is superb, offering and actually providing way more services than other colleges.</p>
<p>I think this is my last post on this thread which I am sure will not make anyone here all that unhappy. I have asked twice if the posters would be willing to finance all the expenses of their mentally ill son living in an apt in a college town who has not attended school for three years, was refusing to take medication and was not seeing a therapist on a regular basis. No one (maybe one poster) has answered the question. The only responses I am getting is how are we suppose to know he is not attending school or he is mentally ill. I got a bridge to sell you guys if you think the parents thought he was successfully completing courses at SBCC, intensively involved in a therapeutic program and was not a very sick individual.</p>
<p>I have one other observation about this thread that Is not altogether surprising. Any attempt to look at the parents role in this sordid mess and to criticize them is met with an emotional and over-the-top response from some of the posters. It’s like I threatened to kill your first born. I guess I didn’t realize some of the parents may be struggling with some of the issues discussed in this thread and would personalize it to this degree. I know it causes an intense reaction from some of the posters, but I think the family dynamics plays a key role in the development of mental illness in children. It is not surprising to see unhealthy relationships between family members where there is mental illness in one or more of the people. </p>
<p>Anyway, I disagree with most of the people commenting on this thread. I don’t assume the parents did all they could or bear no responsibility for what happened or are loving, caring parents who provided a healthy, nurturing environment for ER. I am not necessarily saying it didn’t happen but from what I have learned about the entire situation, I think the odds are the family dynamics are far more complicated than what some of you are willing to concede.</p>
<p>I agree it is likely far more complicated than what we know.</p>
<p>I understand if you don’t care to respond, but I am struggling to think of how a yes or no response to your question will move this discussion along. I rareky find it helpful clinically, to point out what someone did wrong. Most folks already feel pretty bad, right or wrong. The response I seem to be reading is who knows WHAT one would do. You seem to know what you would do, but I don’t, and I have come pretty close to similar scenarios, and from different perspectives. If that makes you a better person, or better parent, I applaud you for it. </p>
<p>I don’t know what the consensus of opinion is on this forum, but one thing that completely frustrates me is that a parent can not get information from the therapist or psychiatrist regarding their child’s “problem” without their permission and I just don’t agree with that. Not even a helpful clue. It happened with our son and then again with my daughter. How are we to help them if we are left in the dark as to what is troubling them? My daughter is 18 now but she was 14 when the problems started. She also saw (still sees) a therapist (and psychiatrist) after her school guidance counselor called us (with our daughters permission) to tell us she had an eating disorder. (We also found out later she was depressed and was cutting herself.) At the time we thought it would be a good idea for her to talk to someone about her insecurities since that had been helpful for our son. We did not pry as to what was wrong until a year later the therapist told us our daughters problem were beyond her scope to help. WTH!! We had no clue. The therapist would not divulge anything about her condition but made a recommendation for an intensive out patient facility, 4 days a week, 3 hours a day. It also included group counseling for the parents, once a week. My daughter met with their psychiatrist (who immediately recommended medication…), saw a nutritionist, and had individual and group therapy sessions. She was also weighed once a week and was drug tested. (which gave us a false sense of security) Drugs weren’t even on the radar—she’s a straight A student in a very high performing school district. I was really upset that no one told us she was testing positively for drugs. The kids that attended this facility had a medley of issues and I really wondered what our daughter was doing here…but we could not find out what was wrong except the “experts” said she needed to be there. She “graduated” from the program but she’s been on all kinds of meds ever since. Currently she is taking Prozac, Lamotrigine (Lamictal) and Adderall. This has all been very stressful for the family, and doubly hard when the parents don’t agree on the treatment. I don’t understand how “they” expect parents to be parents without all of the information. Thank God she’ll be starting Rutgers in the fall. (where my husband works) deja vu all over again.</p>
<p>There is no such thing as a perfect person or family even if from the outside it looks like they might be. God knows we’ve done what we could for our children. </p>
<p>Thinking back to the kids “on the spectrum” who my kids have gone to school with it occurred to me that while they were always just a little out of synch with the other kids it seemed worse as they got older. When kids are young most of what they do is parallel play. That lack of interaction and intuition doesn’t show up as much and other kids don’t feel it as strongly. As they got older “play dates” just became weird as “neurotypical” kids shift modes to more cooperative and interactive play and chit-chat and the “spectrum” kids were still in parallel mode or pressing and insisting on some of the kid obsessions rather than being able to shift gears. Middle school is all about interactions and subtleties with kids and Yu-Gi-Oh obsession isn’t enough anymore in most circles.</p>
<p>Having attended many risk management conferences required for continuing education and licensure renewal, there are many many risks, privacy and confidentiality being only some, to communicating with clients by email. </p>
<p>Well, if the therapist called the mom it doesn’t sound like privacy was a concern for these people.</p>
<p>But, that privacy story above is unbelievably crazy and actually a little frightening. If a school guidance counselor calls me, I’m hanging up immediately.</p>
<p>Confidentiality in the treatment of adolescents</p>
<p>From the OTHER APA </p>
<p><a href=“Confidentiality in the treatment of adolescents”>Internal Server Error; </p>
<p>A chart for California</p>
<p><a href=“http://www.teenhealthlaw.org/fileadmin/teenhealth/teenhealthrights/ca/CaMCConfMentalHealthChart12-10.pdf”>http://www.teenhealthlaw.org/fileadmin/teenhealth/teenhealthrights/ca/CaMCConfMentalHealthChart12-10.pdf</a> ;</p>
<p>Rubrownmom, I agree…it is a travesty the parents are given so little information about their children if they are struggling with mental illness. I will go out on a limb and state with some assurance that if you and your husband were the parents of ER, I don’t think we would be here talking about this very unhappy outcome.</p>
<p>Rubrownmom, are you saying the psychiatrist is prsecribing medicine without your informed consent? She didn’t tell you what they were for? </p>
<p>I realize there is more to it than that.</p>
<p>Thanks for blaming me for my son’s Aspergers and his failures in college, GP. You’re right. It is all my fault. Yes, we did keep paying for three years while he lost his way in one way or another. More than three years, I guess. No, I am not sorry, although if I had it all to do over again I would do some things differently. If only he had been born to you instead. Your total perfection, as explained by you, is an inspiration to us all.</p>
<p>Words cannot express what I feel about your comments. Or at least, words that I can say here cannot express what I feel.</p>
<p>Oh, and the intensive therapeutic program that you recommend for adult children, could you give me a link to it, please? The one that you are so positive exists?</p>
<p>I haven’t been following this thread for a few days, so I apologize if someone posted this already.</p>
<p><a href=“Gun Activists Flaunting Assault Rifles Get Booted From Chili’s and Sonic – Mother Jones”>http://www.motherjones.com/politics/2014/05/guns-open-carry-chilis-sonic-videos</a></p>
<p>Watch the videos. Is it just me or does anyone think these guys actually know they are being ridiculous? (And yes, they are the textbook definition of “yahoos.”)</p>
<p>Here’s a new article outllining the events and outstanding questions. It says the mom called the therapist who called the agency. I don’t know why a therapist would call an agency. An informed guess is that the press is using “therapist” when they may mean counselor which is also not very well defined at this point since the police say in a statement that the caller to the agency identified themselves as a friend. Nevertheless, it’s good catch-up piece.</p>
<p><a href=“http://news.yahoo.com/questions-linger-deadly-beach-town-rampage-194457967.html;_ylt=A0SO8ynkWIpT8jkAINVXNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTB0ZWhlZ3FzBHNlYwNzYwRjb2xvA2dxMQR2dGlkA1NNRTMzOF8x”>http://news.yahoo.com/questions-linger-deadly-beach-town-rampage-194457967.html;_ylt=A0SO8ynkWIpT8jkAINVXNyoA;_ylu=X3oDMTB0ZWhlZ3FzBHNlYwNzYwRjb2xvA2dxMQR2dGlkA1NNRTMzOF8x</a></p>
<p>I, for one, feel sorry for and compassion for, parents who have children who struggle, such as with mental health. I am not in their shoes, but unlike Goldenpooch, I don’t see the parents/family as the cause of these kids’ problems. Mental health issues can strike people from all walks of life and even those who are blessed with the most devoted parents. If parenting was the cause of such problems, then why do many parents have a troubled child and another child who is perfect in every way? Parents can do all the right things and still have a child who suffers from mental illness. They cannot fix this. They can get their child help and support. They can do even less when their child is an adult. I give a lot of credit to parents who bring up children who have a lot of problems. It is hard work just to be parent of a well adjusted kid. Try being a parent of a kid with some major issues. It is not easy, I am sure. I cannot sit and judge such parents. If they are absentee parents, that is one thing. It doesn’t sound like the parents of ER were absentee parents who did nothing. I would not want to walk in their shoes before ER went on the killing spree and certainly not now. I feel sorry for them. Of course, I feel sorry for the parents of the slain kids. ER’s parents are dealing with even more on top of the death of their own son. Putting blame on them for how their son turned out…sorry, but it just doesn’t seem right.</p>
<p>@Shrinkrap No, all of the meds that were/are prescribed were explained why they were being recommended. </p>
<p>What I tried to say is when a child is still a minor, I feel the parent should be able to get all of the facts pertaining to their child’s condition so they can be more alert. I thought my daughter just had an eating disorder when in fact she had many other problems which were not told to us. We never suspected that she was also using recreational drugs and alcohol along with her prescription drugs. It was during a sleep over with her girlfriends that we finally discovered what was going on. They were drunk and high and swimming in our pool. As I already said, how can a parent be a parent if you don’t have all of the information due to the privacy laws. It sounds like some here disagree.</p>
<p>I don’t see it as a “blame” issue, but rather as a responsibility issue. In my opinion, the decision to procreate includes the obligation to society to do everything you can to insure that your progeny is not a killer. If you feel you fulfilled that obligation, then you are good. </p>
<p>I think like the ferpa laws, laws regardingdrug use aee often misinterpreted. A clinician may not share information regarding drug treatment if the client is IN drug treatment, but as farcas I’m concerned, if you are in treatment for something else, and I find out about drugs from labs I have explained to both parent and child, it is what we call “grist for the mill”. Some kids don’t come back after that. </p>
<p>I don’t know about “all” the information. </p>
<p>"…the decision to procreate includes the obligation to society to do everything you can to insure that your progeny is not a killer. "</p>
<p>I wonder if that will be in the next “What to Expect When You’re Expecting”. Remember that?</p>
<p>Actingmt,
If the therapist felt that ER was acutely dangerous, privacy becomes a non issue.
And GP, Mo one even suggested that this kid had an idyllic life. Just because they have means does not mean his life was puppy dogs and butterflies. But to not understand that mental illness often has a biological basis is simplistic thinking. </p>
<p>Why wouldn’t the therapist call the police and request an intervention or a hold for a psych eval or something if there was acute danger? I know I’m hung up on the call to the agency thing but it seems lame to request a welfare check if they truly think they have an emergency situation or even a brewing crisis. </p>