<p>Even though its witty essays like these that make me question my own ability to get acccepted into Chicago, I thought this essay was really great. I enjoyed reading it, so I could see why an admissions officer lived it so much. I don’t think it is provacative. It is very creative. Congrats Rohan</p>
<p>After reading this essay, I have seriously lost all respect for Chicago’s Dean of Admissions as well as Chicago in general. This is what we call “fun writing”. Yes it was witty. But did it accomplish its task? No. You learn nothing about the guy other than he dreams of being a corporate lawyer. Heck, 40% of my graduating class at Columbia, along with every other top-10 school including Chicago, wants to be a corporate lawyer. If this kid wrote a flowery witty piece as his opinion for a law client, he would be disbarred in 6 hours.</p>
<p>Go to your local libraries and check out those books with real accepted essays at Harvard. If this kid’s essay make you go “WOW!” those essays will give you a heart attack.</p>
<p>God.</p>
<p>Seems like just another tedious essay from someone trying way too hard to be cute.</p>
<p>Fail.</p>
<p>“Yes it was witty. But did it accomplish its task? No. You learn nothing about the guy other than he dreams of being a corporate lawyer.”</p>
<p>I beg to differ. I’ve learnt that he is a creative person, who appreciates the value of taking risks in order to stand out. I’ve learnt that he has an excellent vocabulary and writing style, indubitably a skill that colleges search for in students. I’ve also learnt that he is witty, and has a great sense of humour. It’s rather saddening that you read such an ingenious approach to such a banal question, and all you managed to learn about the author is that he dreams of being a corporate lawyer.</p>
<p>Besides, Chicago actively seeks responses such as these. In fact, on their supplement page, it clearly states, “Each topic can be addressed with utter seriousness, complete fancy, or something in between-it is your choice. Play, analyze (don’t agonize), create, compose-let us hear the result of your thinking about something that interests you, in a voice that is your own.” </p>
<p>Well, I suppose what you hate about the essay is the very thing that I love about it. :)</p>
<p>^not only that, but we learn that he likes intellectual conversations about philosophy and theology, and has a sense of humor that is very crude. Also, we learn that he likes to eat semen.
I don’t think the style was something that turned me off. It was the execution of it that did. It was witty and executed okay, but there was little class or subtlety in the way he did it. It was way too bombastic and in-your-face, making it seem fake and really inappropriate for me. The sexual innuendos weren’t exactly done with subtlety or creativity, and the way he expressed his love is a bit over the top. If he did it with a bit more reserve, than it would have been better received on this board. He took a huge risk with this one, and if it fell into more conservative hands, he probably would have been rejected.
But who am I to say this? He got into UChicago. That’s all that really matters.</p>
<p>“not only that, but we learn that he likes intellectual conversations about philosophy and theology, and has a sense of humor that is very crude. Also, we learn that he likes to eat semen.”</p>
<p>I think that people have dirty minds who thought the essay had explicit sexual references. I also think that most adults wouldn’t read the essay that way. Otherwise, the dean wouldn’t have shared the essay with applicants, and the student probably wouldn’t have been accepted.</p>
<p>“t’s rather saddening that you read such an ingenious approach to such a banal question, and all you managed to learn about the author is that he dreams of being a corporate lawyer.”</p>
<p>I agree. The essay reflected a great deal about the author’s personality. He sounds like a very interesting person. I love his wit, and I wish that I knew him.</p>
<p>absolutely brilliant essay, one of the best I’ve ever seen, it’s creative, non-offensive, cute.</p>
<p>here are a few things I’ve gathered about the applicant:</p>
<p>1) He writes very clearly, intelligently with an excellent diction, very few high school seniors can boast this.
2) It seems genuinely written by him, I’m a cynical son of a saying this
3) He is willing to take risks for huge decisions in his life (like getting into college)
4) He wants you to laugh at him in the essay, it’s self-deprecating
5) He shows his desire to be at chicago: “visited you thrice”,
6) he wants to be an intellectual and wants to be around intellectual kids: “late nights and long discussions…Kierkegaard”, “you have that air of brilliance and ingenuity that I crave in a person, you’re so mature and sophisticated”
7) He is ready to criticize and make fun of chicago: “I knew going into it that you would be an expensive one to keep around”, “the mail you send is such a tease”, “Why can’t you just love and not ask why? Not ask about my assets or my past”
8) At its worst, it’s an intentionally cheesy essay and you can tell he doesn’t take himself that seriously
9) I wish he EDed to Columbia :(</p>
<p>Overall, he is clearly a great fit for Chicago.</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>You need to understand how much you can tell from a person’s writing without them having to say it. do you like college essays which read: “I am a national merit semi-finalist, won many tennis tournaments, I am witty, persevering, creative and really fun to hang out with”</p>
<p>
</p>
<p>and he’s not applying to work for a law client, colleges are not law clients for a reason (thank God). Colleges look for enthusiastic, fun students with unique personalities not some analyst to browse through 500 pages of legal documents in 12 hours, get out of your wannabe pretentious lawyer world, and realize what makes a vibrant university atmosphere what it is. Just because everyone around you is doing what it takes to head the rat race, does not mean that yardstick is applicable to judging the quality of college applicants. I’m an Columbia senior heading to wall street saying this, not one of those idealistic commies you met in college.</p>
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</p>
<p>I’ve read a handful pieces of good writing in the spec this year, 20-50? it’s more like 5-10, almost all on bwog.</p>
<p>interesting… creative n witty…:)</p>
<p>C’mon – give me a break! We all know that UChicago is quirky, and for students to whom it appeals, it’s great. I have always loved working with students applying there and reading their great essays. Their essay question about how you would use a gallon container of mustard from a big warehouse store was great fun!</p>
<p>I do, however, criticize the dean for publishing the essay in the hope of reducing applicants’ stress. He did a disservice by providing an example – because other applicants might try to emulate it and not reflect on their own strengths, or students might fret that their essays did not compare.</p>
<p>I have been counseling students independently and very successfully for over 15 years – just a handful each year – and have the best track record – all students I have worked with have been accepted at their first choice colleges. The process is stressful at best, and when the dean publicized this essay - regardless of intent – it only adds to the stress. </p>
<p>When an applicant reads artricles on admissinos or receives e-mails about essays, it only tends to increase the stress of the applications process. Also adding to the stress are the publicity-seeking independent admissions counselors who charge $30,000 and $40,000 (about 20 times more than I do) … who create other products to “sell” parents (such as a $8,000 “applications boot camp”) … pricey advisors who proudly advise and work intensely with marginal students in the process to attain admissions to top shools where they then fail because they don’t have the intense support they sold them in the applications process … and on and on. </p>
<p>It is stressful … and I don’t believe the UChicago Dean of Admissions and these other factors do anything to diminish the anguish, they only magnifiy it!</p>
<ul>
<li><a href="mailto:CollegeAdmissionsCounselor@yahoo.com">CollegeAdmissionsCounselor@yahoo.com</a></li>
</ul>
<p>Although I agree that essays need to be college specific, one could really not write that essay to many other colleges! Few have such a quirky sense!</p>
<p>I enjoyed the essay and find it helpful to see an example of an atypical approach that succeeded. The message I would take is that it’s okay to be yourself and approach the essay in any number of ways. Why would some find this stressful? There’s no reason to conclude that other approaches would not be well received.</p>
<p>This was a fantastic and clever little essay. I don’t see what’s wrong with it.</p>
<p>very original and refreshing compared to the normal admissions slop.</p>
<p>“The letter would energize some students because they’d realize that their quirky way of thinking would be welcome at Chicago.”</p>
<p>Though my essay was not so odd that it would be labeled “quirky”, I still wrote an essay that definitely didn’t hold fast to the standard essay (the most I can tell you about it, is that it was a dialog). And it’s really all thanks to this thread. I thought that University of Chicago only meant the uncommon essay to be an unorthodox expression of the applicant’s character, but seeing this, I was convinced that the Why Chicago? essay offered an opportunity to write this sort of essay as well.</p>
<p>I’ll drop my two cents for bartleby, though he might be entirely sick of reading complaints by now (or reveling in the commotion that he’s caused). I can only say that this essay shows a lot more “personality” than any serious essay I’ve ever read, and even if it is implicit, he still manages to reveal his academic promise. I really don’t think that Chicago’s admission criteria is ‘idiotic’ as you believe; they just want a certain type of person to attend the university because he/she would fit in the atmosphere that it has created. There are several people capable of making full use of UChicago’s vast resources, but I doubt that such a number would be available when you search for people who would actually enjoy university of chicago’s proudly nerdy vibe. And from what I’ve gathered from anecdotal evidence that the students who are admitted and enroll are extremely happy. Obviously, the University of Chicago’s Admissions team must be doing something right!</p>
<p>NSM, I’m sure you mean well but you are coming off as very righteous. Surely you aren’t serious that UofC only is interested in students if they’re witty bonvivants? Any school that has foisted Milton Friedman and the "Chicago School’ of economics upon America is not best known for its lighthearted students! Serious applicants, feel free to apply!</p>
<p>I understand why the UC Dean wanted to publish an example of a successful essay. But he should have selected one, or better yet, several, from the previous admission cycle. By publishing a current candidate’s essay at such a late date in the admission process, he only INCREASED applicants’ stress, for both those who had already completed their applications and those who had little time remaining. After all, every candidate should have had the opportunity to benefit from the example.</p>
<p>In contrast, take a look at the admissions website for Johns Hopkins. As the 2014 admission cycle began, their AdCom published four successful essays of the class of 2013 and briefly explained why each of them worked. Each essay was distinct, and after reading them I had the impression that Hopkins is looking for diverse personalities and that their community wouldn’t be made up of all the same types of people. I only wish they had been available last year to show my son. I sent them to friends who had students in the process this year because these essays demonstrated voice and how voices can be so different. And I didn’t only send them to students applying to Hopkins. And yes, I think these essays decreased the stress because they emphasize there is no one “right” personality, voice, essay. (Of course, some schools may choose all the same types … but that is another issue.) And every applicant had the opportunity to see them before they began their essays. </p>
<p>So three errors on the part of UC:
- publishing only one example
- at such a late date
- using a current candidate (the most harmful – here’s an example of someone who is successful THIS VERY YEAR…writer’s block, anyone? Or if you don’t naturally have a Rohan personality, feeling that this personality is the successful one to have… )</p>
<p>And as for the essay, I understand why it was appreciated, particularly this late in the admission process, but I wonder if it would have been chosen to represent the successful UC essay after all the essays of the class of 2014 were considered. And just a nagging feeling, but I don’t think “you’d be so expensive to keep around” is from a collegebound mind. Not my very bright son’s anyway. Made me smile though but I am the parent paying. Hmm.</p>
<p>“NSM, I’m sure you mean well but you are coming off as very righteous. Surely you aren’t serious that UofC only is interested in students if they’re witty bonvivants?”</p>
<p>Of course not. However having smarts and a quick wit is a plus for people in almost any situation. It’s also a combination that few people have. </p>
<p>JFK had a quick wit. Sportscaster James Brown of ESPN is a quick witted Harvard grad. Sen. Al Franken is a Harvard grad who was a comedian. </p>
<p>Being able to write a smart, witty college essay would make an applicant stand out in a good way at probably all top schools.</p>
<p>"Any school that has foisted Milton Friedman and the "Chicago School’ of economics upon America is not best known for its lighthearted students! "</p>
<p>It’s a fallacy that bright people lack senses of humor. In Googling “Milton Friedman” and “humor,” I found plenty of examples of the wit of that revered late economist. Here’s one:</p>
<p>“I remember when his 10-part television serious Free to Choose ran on PBS. It was in a time of national malaise, when recession and high unemployment was combined with double-digit inflation. Inflation had persisted for mre than a decade. From the conventional liberal point of view, the problem was intractable. In one of the episodes of Free to Choose, Milton Friedman walked through a government monetary printing plant. As he approached the gigantic press turning out US currency, Friedman reached out and hit the red emergency STOP button. The press’s operation instantly came to a halt. Milton Friedman twinkled at the camera, and announced: “I have just stopped Inflation.” And the viewing audience understood that he was perfectly right.”</p>