<p>More so than I could have ever hoped, esp with my S. I had some worries that he’d be a little adrift, but he took to his school even better than I could have dreamed and was actually elected president of a fairly important campus organization (with a $75,000 budget) as a freshman. D loves hers as well, so it’s all good.</p>
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<p>My son did not pick the most expensive colleges. In fact, he picked the least expensive option as that allowed him to have money for grad school someday. Luckily for him, and for us, the least expensive option has turned out to be as good a fit as we had hoped it would be.</p>
<p>I’m not sure, but S frequently describes his campus as “we are all the same person”, so he should at least be finding frineds with things in common. The “fit” for him was finding a challenging school. It has definitely turned out to be that. Although there is some complaining about being stressed, I think it was good for him to be challenged and will serve him well later in life.</p>
<p>Great fit and great merit $$. And dear son graduated in 4 years!</p>
<p>Yes and maybe. S1 found his tribe at Carnegie Mellon made friends, made connections and has a great job doing exactly what he’s always wanted to do.</p>
<p>S2 has had some great experiences at Tufts, but does not like the bureaucracy either of the school as a whole, or of the International Relations committee. He’s unfortunately extremely ungifted at languages and taking an extremely tough one. In fact he may end up dropping his language course this term if it doesn’t totally screw up the possibility of graduating in time. In retrospect he might have been better off at American. Or maybe taking a sophomore year abroad to get the language thing nailed down sooner. Interestingly one thing he has gotten out of his experience with his classmates is gratitude that we sent him to a public high school.</p>
<p>Child 1 - absolutely not
Child 2 - yes</p>
<p>D1 wanted warm weather or urban environment, more specifically NYC, so Columbia was her top choice. When I recommended for her to apply to Cornell, she poo-pooed on it. She fell in love with it the first week she was on campus. She has thanked me numerous times for making her go to there.</p>
<p>Now D2 will be going there, we will see how it works out for her.</p>
<p>Yes, and yes.</p>
<p>S graduated last May and cannot picture himself having been any happier at any other college than the one he chose. That said, he’s not a fan of their administration and had a few professors he didn’t care for - but he realizes no college would ever be 100% perfect. He started college wanting nothing to do with the Greek system, then surprised even himself by joining a fraternity which turned out to be of his best experiences at college. I think the real reason he loved his college is that he made a solid group of good friends who have remained closely tied together although they’ve been out of school almost a year and live up to 3 hours apart. S is kind of quiet and can be very independent, so this tight-knit co-ed group of 6 loyal friends has been a truly great thing for him. He treasures them.</p>
<p>D was convinced about her college from the moment she set foot there - actually even before that. As we were approaching the college to tour it for the first time her dad and I wanted to make a detour to see something else briefly, but she said, “No, we need to get to the campus - it’s calling to me.” She applied ED and has loved it (finishing her soph year). There have been challenges, but she’s never questioned her decision to go there and is already dreading graduation. For the first time since middle school, I think she really feels like she BELONGS and fits in.</p>
<p>D1 is very happy. I have reservations sometimes. but she has made good connections and will most likely do well.</p>
<p>Not a parent and still in college 
And I have only been here for (almost) two semesters but I cannot imagine myself going anywhere else. I absolutely LOVE UCONN. </p>
<p>Classes, opportunities, events, people, they’re so great. There’s soo much going on. The worst thing here is housing. And I even lucked out in that department. Love it, love it, love it.</p>
<p>1st: Terrible match - URochester was too much “college” for my son should have stayed closer to home and gone to a ‘lesser’ school.
2nd: Wonderful match - Northwestern is perfect for my got-to-be-in-business-one-day son.
3rd: Absolutely yes - WashU fits my easy-going, gets-along-with-everyone kid who sees himself going to Med school one day.</p>
<p>You should all appreciate how lucky you are! As the saying goes, a mother is as happy as her least happy child. . . you should all be thrilled that your kids are so happy. I am just sad.</p>
<p>S2 coming back home in May. I still can’t understand totally why it didn’t work out for him. He is putting it all to being overwhelmed academically, but I never felt that it fit socially either. Makes me so sad for him. Still hasn’t come up with where he is transferring to locally, although the local universities all have “Transfer Days” May and June, so he has a few weeks to decide. Not sure how that decision will be made, as not sure if this is just a stop-gap measure to get things figured out then transfer “away” in the Fall or for the last two years, or if commuting for the rest of college. Worried about making another “wrong” choice. Sigh.</p>
<p>So far for DS, he’s made the right choice. (freshman.)</p>
<p>He is at the more expensive private over our state flagship. (some discount, but not still more expensive.)</p>
<p>I don’t think it’s a “perfect fit” for him, but in many ways, it’s working well. He’s doing well academically, getting the personal attention (and accountability) that he needs, and growing into a terrific young man. He was home recently and went back early to study - said he needed to get back to the library (and he was serious!) This is a kid who was never able to manage his time, and I wasn’t sure he even knew how to study, so it’s very encouraging!
Socially, he’s finding his way. I had thought he’d fit better at a STEM school, but where he is now, he’s hanging out with a wider range of people.</p>
<p>My son’s school was not his first choice, but he’s adapted well. He is graduating this year and has just learned that he is valedictorian of his class. I now believe that most kids can do just fine at a number of schools.</p>
<p>DS knew the moment he saw the campus that he wanted to go to his present U (OOS). DD wasn’t so sure, but loves it.</p>
<p>UMMom2015 (oh no, it’s in your user name ), I could have written your post three years ago at this time about my D. Please know, it WILL work out. It’s the not knowing that is so tough, on top of the pain you feel for your kid. I used to joke with my DH that all I wanted was a crystal ball; I didn’t care HOW it turned out as much as knowing it WOULD turn out OK. My D came back to our area, transfered to the much “easier” college she should have attended from the beginning, commuted for two years, and took some time to get it together. But she did, and will graduate next month. Hang in there, and know you are not alone.</p>
<p>UMMom - is your son a freshman? Sometimes that alone is enough to ‘explain’ a rough year. Some are in heaven their first year, some struggle. Mutti’s ‘crystal ball’ comment is so true! A year ago at this time I was honestly very worried about my younger son. Now a year later, with a new major and another year of adjusting to life’s changes under his belt, things are looking so much brighter. In his case he never felt the issue was his school, but if he had, I would have encouraged him to go elsewhere. </p>
<p>Not every school is perfect for every child. Does the thought of a fresh start elsewhere give him a feeling of optimism? If so, I’d definitely go with it. If not, there might be other issues than just the school. I’d listen to him very carefully and encourage him to do his best to try to identify the things that don’t feel right for him now.</p>
<p>Ummom: everyone has a different path; be assured, it will all work out…I know a bunch of kids who took the path your son is taking and are now doing well…</p>
<p>Both my S’s chose instate public u’s. They pretty much knew they would be accepted so there was never any angst or big decisions to make. Academically they were fine. They both had good experiences,never regretted their choices…not saying they couldn’t have been happy somewhere else because I’m sure they could have. Both are very social. </p>
<p>My friend’s D who was the Val of S1’s class went to Wake Forest…hated it. Parents were so upset. She left WFU after her first semester. She came home and attended nearby branch state u. for a semester while reapplying to flagship state u. Spent the next three years at flagship state u…loved it. Is now a third year med. student there.
It all worked out. Don’t lose hope,OP. Your S will find his way.</p>