<p>dchow (post #16), I would have tackled that parent who said Swartmore was a few notches below Princeton, and put a pie in his/her face.</p>
<p>The best answer to give a student who says s/he was accepted at X, is "Wow! Great school! Congratulations!"</p>
<p>^^^ heyalb,
Agreed, its wonderful whe someone responds positively to the school your (our?) kids attend. My older s went to a very good, but small school that doesnt have strong name recognition to a lot of people (Rice) and I got more quizzical looks when I responded to their question of where he was attending.</p>
<p>And to the OP-- I have to wonder if the parent who made the tacky response was confusing Northwestern with Northeastern. Happens all the time..</p>
<p>Ugh Thats awful I know...I have a friend who wants to go to Michigan State, and Im doing this to make her feel beter:</p>
<p>TYLER CAROLIN WILL GET INTO MICHIGAN STATE!</p>
<p>Next time someone asks you where you applied, simply assume an "Aw shucks" tone and say, "Just a small private school in New Jersey." Then, if they ask, "Which one?" say, "Princeton." Even if it's not true, they'll shut up and leave you alone.</p>
<p>I'm with the other parents who don't ask seniors about college plans. I work in our school's college center, and know there's enough stress without constantly being asked about it. Plus, aren't there a FEW other subjects we can talk about???</p>
<p>When speaking with my D's classmates about their plans for college I am ALWAYS supportive and encouraging with their choices. Whether its the local CC or a top tier school, I give them a big smile and tell them how proud they must be of themselves. It's really scary just how many ignorant and snobbish people there are out in the world!</p>
<p>Is it possible THE Northwestern didn't come to mind for the guy and his daughter's safety is actually Northwestern College or Northwestern State University or, perhaps, Northeastern or Northeastern Illinois University? Certainly, if he meant what he said, what he said was a ridiculous comment to be made by anyone with any familiarity with THE Northwestern University. I'll bet he didn't mean to say what he said.</p>
<p>Ughh this is my pet peeve! I was one of three students who applied early to Swarthmore from my school and this one girl who applied had really good grades and was really good at science even though she wanted to go into theater. One of the science teachers at my school, who is the biggest, most obnoxious gossiper ever, actually told a bunch of her friends, "Why would she ever want to go to Swarthmore? She is ruining her life! She could get into an ivy!" When one of my friends told me what he said, I was appalled! But it just shows how ignorant he is and he doesn't truly know what makes a school good. Ivy's are not the end all, be all of the educational system. It turns out that the girl got deferred from Swat. The girl is clearly an impressive student, one who happened to get deferred from Swat because it is a really hard school to get into, yet now that same teacher is even more outraged because he feels she was overqualified for the school. Some people will never learn....</p>
<p>Heh, well I know what you mean. Certain parents can actually be so ignorant about colleges and the kinds of students going to them. I mean, I know parents who'll automatically judge someone going to UC Berkeley to be a better student than someone going to UCLA. Or, if they don't know the school name, they'll assume it's not great. Ridiculous things! Heck, I know people who said "I never heard of Caltech," and when I explain, they kind of just go "Oh, OK."</p>
<p>The way to deflect these things if you're a student is to A. Do great things in school and set your own insecurities at rest, B. Then ignore these parents, or even chuckle at their ignorance, as others say.</p>
<p>The other thing is that parents often mistake school name to imply academic reputation of the given student! SUCH poor correlation. Harvard students can be great high schoolers but only decent college students. Berkeley students can be completely uninterested in academics. I mean, in all seriousness...bright, talented people end up all over the place, and do well based on what they do for themselves in college.</p>
<p>ok this reminds me of a story...i was talking to this asian mom (im asian too) who has a daughter in a (lower) ivy league college and she asked me what my first choice college was, and I said it was MIT, but I was deferred...and she was like oh MIT? you're a girl, that should be EASY to get into...and i was like are you kidding me? in a kinda shocked/rude way because i was surprised...and she added "well, but it's a hard place to graduate from." and i was just ****ed because 1) i was deferred and 2) MIT is way harder to get into for both girls and guys than the school your daughter goes to anyways >:[ LOL. just because your daughter goes to an ivy does not mean you know everything.</p>
<p>Wow, I know this type. He is sure that everyone adores him when no one likes him. He's basically the boss from The Office.</p>
<p>Way back, in the early days, when college first appeared on our family radar, I made the rookie mistake of asking a neighborhood kid where he's applying. Even though he politely answered with the names of a couple public schools (IS & OOS) I got the distinct impression asking about it was my major faux pas. (And I promise my reaction was positive and supportive.)</p>
<p>So, from that point on I vowed my chit-chat-conversation-starter with high school seniors would be, "so, do you have any plans after graduation?" Some give a literal answer like, "yes, we're going out to dinner at Chez Fancy." A couple tell me about their "beach week" reservation. And a few talk about college. Whatever they say, I follow their lead and stick with that subject. Ever since that first mistake, I don't bring up college. I let the kid mention it if he/she chooses. I thought I found a safe ice breaker. Apparently not.</p>
<p>Now I read on this thread that all topics about future plans are off limits because it's too much pressure to put on the kid. We must ignore the child's imminent milestone and talk about the weather, sports and movies. Fine. I can go along with that. </p>
<p>But I'm not gonna let my kids dread well-meaning curiosity from the adults in their orbit. When Miss Peggy down the block or great-uncle Gary innocently asks "where are you going?" S&D will be ready and able to engage. I mean, shoot. If I'm coaching them for job interviews and admissions interviews, it's nothing to help them prepare for an inconsequential question from so-and-so. If my kids can't handle that much "pressure," then maybe they aren't ready for college.</p>
<p>i can't stand the "college" questions right now because I have no idea where I'm going to end up. and when i say that people are always like, "what?! how do you not know yet?" </p>
<p>come april i won't really mind the questions because i'll know for sure haha</p>
<p>I often find myself flinging internal middle-fingers and obscenities at people who bemoan colleges that they haven't really heard of. Luckily, there are a lot of people who are genuinely interested about where you are going to school, and not trying to brag about their children.</p>
<p>most people i talk to havent heard of any of the schools i want to go to. theyre all art schools, so people just smile and nod.</p>
<p>I'd bet the party dad in the OP didn't mean anything by way of comparison. More likely that he was just reacting with recognition of the name, then trying to give Homer some reassurance (hey, if it's my daughter's safety, you'll have no trouble getting in). Adults can say some pretty awkward things while struggling to carry on conversations with teens.</p>
<p>@mathboy: When geek_son was considering Caltech (before he visited and fell in love with Mudd -- keep an eye on your cannon next year ;)), he would get that reaction a lot. "Caltech, what's that?" Or, "Oh really, Cal Poly?" He actually had some fun with that for a while. Seems like most people recognize the Ivies and the big football schools, and anything else is off their radar. Even more so with a name like Harvey Mudd. As long as potential employers and grad school adcoms recognize the name, who cares.</p>
<p>totally. just wait until she gets that rejection letter.
ull be able to giv him the "thats wassup" look.</p>
<p>To OP: Nice use of Rushmore reference!</p>
<p>Also in response to this:
[quote]
I was talking to my friend's mom before this end-of-the-year awards night thing, and I told her that I decided to go to Swarthmore. She told me her son was at Princeton and she said, "Oh, Swarthmore. That's a good school. Just a few notches below Princeton."
[/quote]
</p>
<p>With friends like these, who needs friends?</p>
<p>One of my good friends was confused for about two weeks when I told her I was going to Haverford. Apparently, she went around telling everyone, "Sligh_Anarchist got accepted to Harvard! ZOMG!!!" I eventually found out this gross misinterpretation and informed her no, "I will be attending Haverford College, it's a small liberal arts college outside of Philadelphia." This friend thought that over Facebook I misspelled Harvard ... :(</p>
<p>^Hopefully anyone who's accepted at Harvard wouldn't misspell it to that extent. :/</p>