Despite having homeschool acquaintances who nearly all went to Christian colleges, we have never seriously considered it mainly because 1) I haven’t found one that has a STEM or Computer Science program that I think is better than secular; 2) imho the cost is not justified for an UG degree.
Our kids are planted solidly in their faith. We feel the walk is up to them, as adults, from here on out. And it’s fine to go to Christian college, too, imho. Just weigh the cost. Be good stewards.
It’s okay (not optimal, but ok) for the student to take on debt within the limit of Stafford loans, ie., $5,500 for freshman year, and 27K for all of undergrad, because that’s what a new college graduate can safely pay back in 10 years. Consider it an investment in yourself (/that your child makes in himself or herself.)
However, it’s not okay for parents to take on debt for their child’s schooling. They can choose to but if it’s the only way but in your situation there’s the state college, right? Is the public university a good one? with good offerings in your child’s area of interest?
I’d be especially hesitant about using HELOC because it’s risky for the whole family.
Is there any other college - smaller and private, but perhaps not that one college, or public but academically better/with more Christian groups/nearer a church that your pastor would recommend - that may meet your child’s spiritual needs as well as financial needs? You could give us an area of the country and your child’s stats (esp., test scores) I’m sure the community here would be glad to suggest some colleges where deadlines haven’t passed yet.
My argument has always been if the colleges don’t think you’re a good bet (with merit scholarships), why should we go into debt at 6 figure level for them?
I know this sounds really heartless, but I’m not going to go into debt for six figures so my kid can get an english lit degree from a private school and go work at Starbucks because she didn’t want to work hard enough to have skin in the game.
I should add that both kids test in the 99.5+ %ile for smarts and have no learning disabilites, so the only thing keeping them from crushing school and getting good scholarships is laziness or lack of ambition-neither of which I’m going to subsidize from our retirement.
We worked our ass off to get here; they should too. And they know that and are mostly cool with it. Occasional grumping occurs.
hey thanks all for your thoughts. i appreciate it all. my heart and head tell me different things.
not going to mention the christian college so this forum doesnt show up on a search engine . . . but its a good place she’d love to attend; we are waiting to hear back from scholarship committees to see if there’s any more options besides what she’s been offered. It’s one of 2 christian colleges in the US which offer her intended undergrad degree – arch itecture design. (grad school is another story!)
flagship state school: yes she does have a tuition-free scholarship there. She’d be ok there; in the honors program and she’d get connected with different christian groups.
its just for her personally this place looks so nurturing. anyway; thanks for thoughts. we are pondering it all
Personally, if your kid is going into architectural design, I think you’d be crazy not to put her into the state flagship tuition-free. Take a look at how difficult it is for architects to get jobs here in the US in their major. It’s not good.
My issue with schools that are homogeneous (or more homogeneous) is that life isn’t homogeneous, and if you haven’t “vaccinated” your kid with your own morals and values, they’re not going to stick when they get out into heterogeneous life.
Some values won’t stick anyway, but that’s another thread :).
@raregroove The plural of anecdote is not data.
My faith at a secular college has actually grown because i’m not in an environment where faith is forced on me. It’s helped me take my faith into my own hands and let me grow spiritually because I feel as though I am more accountable.
Ah. I so wanted my daughter to attend a Christian college, primarily because I had such a fantastic experience at Biola over 20 years ago. However, she wants none of it. Toured Biola. Hated it. Toured Pepperdine. Hated it. The only ones she is considering are Hope (in Michigan) and Westmont. But financially, we can’t afford it. So I’m hoping she chooses to hook up with Cru or Young Life or some other group while at a state school. Like others have said, at this point, her faith journey is her own and up to her.
I love Cru!
I think religious schools provide better environment to strengthen religious upbringing of their students. If you can afford it has its benefits, having a community during your student life where you are comfortable around likeminded people is a good thing. Of course, find a decent school where academia are on par as well.
I would advise the Christian college, but 30K in parental loans (on top of studen loans, which are okay) is a lot and sounds very risky for the whole family(HELOC). Especially for architecture design.
Are there ways to make the large university feel smaller? If she met with organizations and a church ahead of time, it may not seem as vast. Perhaps ask the Honors College for an overnight and make sure she schedules apointments with various Christian groups on campus and a church near campus that your pastor recommends.The Honors Program should help, too.
An argument in favor of the secular school is, you don’t want the student to feel “in a Christian bubble” that they have to break out of after graduation. It may be better to let them do their questioning while in a semi-structured environment, with Christian clubs readily available on a secular campus. I know many kids who went to extremely conservative schools, who felt they needed to break free and chuck it all after graduation.
IMO, I would let the student decide. My kids have attended state schools and done just fine.
Never depend on any school, Christian or secular, to keep your kids faithful. For the Christian parent, all of that bringing them up in the nuture and admonition of the Lord has to be done long before they head off to college. If you have given your kids a solid foundation in Christianity, by this point, they have probably decided whether or not they want to live a Christian life. If they have committed themselves to the faith, then the best thing I think that parents can do is make sure there will be a community of faithful believers, a church, a congregation, close by. This is where your kids will find spiritual support. My kids turned down offers from colleges when, after we visited the areas, there was not a strong congregation. In those areas where there were some options, we worshipped with those groups, talked to the leaders and members - that was an essential part of every college visit. We spent as much time exploring the available spiritual community as we did the colleges themselves.
One thing to make sure your kids understand, when it comes to Christian colleges, is that they are going to deal with the same kinds of sins that a secular university would expose them to, except it will be accompanied by a lot of hypocrisy and secrecy. I think it is the hypocrisy that turns many young Christians away from their faith.
@chesterton, your last paragraph is exactly why my daughter was turned off by most of the Christian colleges she visited. She felt that kids were signing statements of faith not necessarily because they wanted to, but because their parents wanted them to. If she is going to choose a Christian college, she wants one in the model of Hope or Pepperdine where the professors are Christian but the student body doesn’t necessarily have to be one, thereby promoting diversity of thought in a safe place.
As someone who attended a Christian college for part of my college career, I think it is most important to focus on quality of education. “Christian” or not, it is college after all. The educational experience must be vigorous and challenging. Too many students I met thought they were coming to yearlong summer camp. They would fail their required Bible classes. Some were there because their parents were desperate to reform them. It is absolutely heartbreaking for Christian parents to witness their children being overtaken by the world, but rarely will a Christian college bring them back. Instead, those reform students ruin the experience for the students who are committed to their faith. So, yes, a place like Pepperdine can be good because the university is well known for the caliber of scholarship and reputation of professors. Most people I have met who know about Pepperdine have no clue about its Christian perspective. Another thing to think about is that secular schools need the presence of people of faith. Might not be as easy for the Christian student, but then whenever has the Christian life been easy.
You may also want to consider Catholic colleges, they too are Christian schools.
Thank you all for your responses. Just to clarify, at the time, my son really didn’t know what he wanted. My husband and I had always planned on (and did) let him make his own decision. He has chosen Liberty University and will be attending there in the fall of 2016 as a freshman. We are all very happy about his decision (although I’m struggling with him bring 7+ hours away)
I went to a secular college and came home one semester later as an atheist. My mother kicked me out because I would not go to church on Sundays as an example to the younger siblings.I told her I did not believe in God anymore. She called me a heretic, I let her know that I would rather be a heretic than a hypocrite!
@MUOhioAlum, while I sympathize with wanting a Christian college and allowing your son to attend his dream school, it sounded like the college wasn’t affordable without HELOC or lots of loans which would weight upon the family (and thus any other child’s ability to attend college). It would make me very worried - a college that “gaps” an admit to that extent is doing what they call “admit-deny”, ie., they admit for the money but would deny otherwise. (If they really want the student to attend, they don’t “gap” to such an extent.)
@MYOS1634 = – it was me, not OP-- who sort of hijacked this thread as the OP hadnt been on for awhile, and we had similar concerns about schools, combined with prices as well. sorry. we find out this week about final costs/scholarships.
@MUohioalum : good luck to your son! thanks for sharing the news.
@bgbg4us, @MUohioalum: my apologies, I got you two confused indeed.
Good luck 
and keep us updated.