<p>Hey guys. So I don't want to give too much away, since part of the reason I'm posting here instead of talking to current students is that I don't want my house to know too much about this until I'm SURE, but I'm kind of thinking about switching dorms. Before I came to college, I hadn't partied much (read: at all), but since being here, I've found that I really love the traditional college scene, work hard play hard and all that. The older kids in my house are pretty into that, and a few of my peers, but the vast majority of them just aren't, and I feel out of place. Thing is, it's a very tight-knit community, so I don't know a ton of people from other dorms. I know some, but for instance, not well enough to get pulled into an apartment in South (which is where I'm considering switching to). I was just wondering for anyone who knows anything about this kind of thing, what would my options be for switching after this year? (I would be willing to consider doing a traditional double instead of an apartment since I know those would probably be taken). Would I be able to make friends with the others in that house?? And I realize that it's still somewhat early, but the issue isn't me not liking my house, it's just we like to have fun in different ways, so I'm just trying to get an idea of my options. I'd appreciate any input, really, since I just don't want to discuss it with people in my house until I'm sure. Thanks guys!</p>
<p>A few quick ideas (from a parent):</p>
<ol>
<li><p>Don’t make any decisions based on your first 7 weeks of college. There’s a way to go in your first year. A lot of people learn new things about themselves when they go to college, and change their behaviors, but often there’s sort of a pendulum swing back and forth between the “new” you and the “old” you until you figure out what the “you” you is. That’s happening to the other people you know, too. Trust me, in four months no one is going to be quite what they are now.</p></li>
<li><p>Also, the tendency is going to be for your classmates in your house, like you, to become more like the older kids in your house. That’s how the older kids got that way. But people develop at different speeds, and you don’t know how long it took the older kids to get the way they are. In a few months, you may feel a lot less out of place.</p></li>
<li><p>You have at least another full quarter before you have to make decisions here. If you don’t feel you know kids outside of your house, get to know them. (Where and with whom do you party, anyway, if you like to party but not with the only kids you know?) There is plenty of time to figure out whether there are kids somewhere else that you would like to live with.</p></li>
<li><p>Also, by the way, let me predict that your house will get a little less close-knit as the year goes on. That certainly is how it worked with my kids. At Thanksgiving of their first years, probably 80-90% of their friends and social lives were house-centered. By Mother’s Day, that percentage was more like 10-20%, and heading lower. Both of them made what will probably be lifelong friends in college . . . who weren’t from their houses and whom they hadn’t even met at this point in their first years.</p></li>
<li><p>Another thing you’ll find over time is that it’s not an either/or world. You can like to party and still be really good friends with people who don’t party at all. In high school, usually, you have to choose which side you’re on, but in college you don’t have to choose at all. I lived this personally – In college, I loved nothing more than big, noisy, boozy parties, especially if there was dancing and girls to flirt with. My wife, whom I met in college, at that point thought that her idea of Hell was more than six or seven people in a room with alcohol and music too loud to have a serious conversation over. That stopped us from going to parties together, but not from becoming friends and ultimately partners. And guess who turns out to really love dancing and parties?</p></li>
<li><p>Consider, too, that there’s a big difference between liking to party with people and liking to party with people in your bedroom. Some people like to preserve a space that’s quiet, private, clean (maybe), their own. A place to come BACK to after the party. You don’t need to have the party in your living space, and you may not enjoy it so much if it’s there. That’s not true of everyone, but it’s true of a lot of people. You should try to figure out whether it’s true of you, though, before you sign a residence agreement at Party Central.</p></li>
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<p>Everything that JHS said. You should definitely wait it out longer, and seriously, although now your housemates are your best friends, that really won’t be the case after a while, particularly as you get more involved on campus. If you do end up wanting to switch spring quarter, it is possible to do so, just not to certain dorms that have high retention rates (Max, and possibly BJ?) - switching to South is definitely possible. And we’ve had people switch into my dorm after first-year and they have settled in just fine.</p>
<p>What they said. </p>
<p>I switched, but only because I had a number of good friends in another house that I knew for certain that I would prefer to live (and party) with. I think it’s a bit more complicated if you’re just moving into a house at random where you may not know anyone. For all you know, you could be moving into a house where everyone is completely against alcohol and likes to knit together on the weekends. </p>
<p>However, going back to what they said, this doesn’t really matter right now. By housing lottery in the spring, you’ll have a much clearer idea of what you want to do.</p>