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<p>I guess back then this was the functional equivalent of taking your car to college. But today a horse is much more of a luxury. The big difference is that you don’t need to drive and gas-up your car every day whether you want or not. You’ve got to regularly exercise a horse and feed it every single day, rain or shine. It doesn’t matter that you have a big test or term paper due on which you desperately need to focus.</p>
<p>If you think she’s able to care for the horse and all of the logistics work out (and you’re comfortable with how they work), I don’t see why you wouldn’t let her bring the horse. I don’t see any problem with her having a car if you are comfortable with letting her take one, and it seems like her social life isn’t much of a concern. </p>
<p>Besides perhaps that the idea of bringing a horse to college is less heard of, I don’t see much of a difference between this and students who practice an instrument for hours every day or who want to practice a sport every day. I had good friends who were dedicated musicians and would regularly practice their instrument, and I had other friends who would disappear for weeks while they were preparing for a show in the theater program. They all still found time for their schoolwork and made great friends both related to their hobby and outside of their interests. I also had friends that spent pretty much all of their free time in labs doing research (some of whom didn’t want to pursue a PhD, but they just liked their lab and the people). They all had to sacrifice other opportunities to do what they loved, but it was their passion and I wouldn’t fault them for that.</p>
<p>My D did not take her horse to college with her. He stayed home with me to care for him :). She was on her university’s IHSA team and took lessons with the team once or twice a week. Then there were the IHSA shows on the weekends. So besides what would have been extra cost to board him at school (we kept him here at home, not boarded at another barn) she would not have had time that first semester to do anything with him as she had a very rigorous schedule of courses. Plus it was important to have time for new friends and activities. She had a very busy first semester without the horse there. </p>
<p>Your D needs to contact the coach or captain of the team to find out the details such as how often they lesson, can they ride at times other than lessons, what is the level of the horses in the lesson program, what time commitment is required of team members? Some IHSA teams require their members to work out at the gym as well. She should also ask if her college hosts an IHSA show during the year. If they do, it would be important for her to be familiar with all the horses that she could draw for whatever class level she would be entered. It sounds like she is just learning to jump? The barn may have a few lesson horses that excel at that level. So she may find she does not have a lot of extra time on her hands if the IHSA team is very active.</p>
<p>I think you need to clarify with the school if they have any policies related to this. We had a bus that went out to the barn. Plenty of riders spent plenty of time there (that’s the way it is with serious riders, no? That’s how it is for her, now?) - and came back and integrated socially, met people, made friends, hung out- and managed their schoolwork, etc. Only you know whether your daughter can handle all this.</p>
<p>But ask the college. Plenty of kids brought their own horses, but at the time, not first-semester freshmen. And the horse had to be sound and qualified for the programs. It costs more than $700, plus fees for vet and all the rest that horses rack up in charges.</p>
<p>I was going to say Mt Holyoke but latichever beat me to it.</p>
<p>I just remembered another friend whose daughter (older than my kids so I forgot about her) brought her horse to college. Her college also had stables and I think she even got work/study there so it was easy to see her horse. She now works as a regional sales rep for a saddle and tackle maker and of course still rides and competes regularly although she is a decade past college. The OP’s question while not usual is not totally unusual. Horses are not a cheap passion anyway you look at it. </p>
<p>I remember touring Alfred with son 2 and I believe they had an equestrian facility as I vaguely recall them asking if we wanted to go see them and I believe the facilities were brand new that year. That first year that had a dozen or so students who had brought their horses according to the admissions office, but that is all I remember.</p>
<p>Can you suggest that the horse follow in a few months, provided her grades show that she is able to add more to her plate (assuming that cost is not an issue)? It’s flipping the coin. Instead of letting her have the horse and bringing it home if her grades suffer, I’d suggest letting her earn the privilege of having her horse at school. </p>
<p>You’ve gotten really great advice on both sides of the question. My Step-D did bring a horse with her to college. She started asking about taking her horse with her the month before school started too. Of course, she then needed her car to get back and forth to the barn, and a horse trailer…overall, it was very expensive. </p>
<p>She spent most of her free time in the barn instead of spending it with other girls in the dorm. Her grades suffered. With the benefit of 20-20 hindsight, I see that she wasn’t totally looking forward to college. It could have been a horse, a pet dog or cat, or stuff that wouldn’t fit in her dorm room - the point is that she wanted to hang onto the familiar. </p>
<p>Ultimately she dropped out at the end of sophomore year. She happily works with horses for a living now, so it’s clear where her heart always was. </p>
<p>It will depend on the school, the cost, the student, her interests and needs, etc. Based on our family’s experience, I definitely agree with Blossom. There are pros but there are also some cons. Please let us know what you decide, and how it works out.</p>
<p>My niece is bringing her horse to Penn State with her this year. She is a sophomore and did not bring it for freshman year. I think my sister’s reasoning for sending the horse is the hope that it will keep my niece busy and get her mind off of her stupid good for nothing boyfriend. She doesn’t have a car on campus, but a friend does that also keeps a horse at the stable.</p>
<p>This is a bit confusing. Your daughter WILL be riding each week, more than once. She WILL have horses in her life. It’s not like she is going to college and there won’t be any horses as part of her routine.</p>
<p>This leased horse is an ADDITIONAL horse. My opinion…it is not a necessity. If it were me, I would, say no. OR I would have the daughter contribute half of the cost of leasing and taking that horse to college.</p>
<p>She will have a group of riding friends, and responsibilities with THOSE horses, right? I’m not sure I see the need for another horse.</p>
<p>She does need time to devote to college work, and other aspects of college life besides horses. And yes, I realize she loves horses.</p>
<p>I’d hold off on making any decisions about this for awhile. Maybe plan on leasing the horse for a few more months until you sort this out.</p>
<p>You and your daughter need to talk with the coach, visit that barn, and figure out if the horse would be well-taken care of, and how the riding team is working out for her first. IHSA teams are strange animals, and the catch-riding thing doesn’t appeal to everyone. Let her settle in, meet the team, investigate a bit more how this would work, asking all the questions on your list. Take your time, wait until first quarter grades are out, and don’t rush into anything. IHSA season is long (both semesters) so there’s really no huge rush. </p>
<p>I know good horses are VERY hard to find to lease (that’s why we end up buying our own, right?) so maybe just lease a few more months so you can better assess whether to give up the lease, or move this pony to school!</p>
<p>Good luck to you.</p>
<p>Reading this thread, I’m thrilled that my DD is afraid of horses. One less expense and one less thing to worry about when she goes off to college.</p>
<p>p.s. I guess I’m also surprised to find out that there are college-age girls still riding horses. We live in a “horsey” community and many of my DD’s friends have been horse enthusiasts… until around age 14 or 15 when their interests turned to boys, cars, parties, etc., and their parents found themselves stuck with expensive horses that were nothing but a big money pit and a pain in the a$$.</p>
<p>You can take a horse to college, but you can’t make it think.</p>
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<p>Really??</p>
<p>IHSA has almost 400 member colleges with over 9000 riders showing - and that is women and men, although women do outnumber men by quite a bit. Then there are the 18 varsity equestrian teams in division I (with some riders that receive full or partial scholarships for the sport) and 4 colleges in division II athletics. Those varsity teams average 46 riders per team. So that is a lot of college age girls still riding horses.</p>
<p>And this does not even touch on the number of students who still ride, but do not ride as part of a school team.</p>
<p>It doesn’t surprise me that college-age girls love horses. My niece didn’t have a horse to bring to college, but she found a local stable and rode occasionally while she was there.</p>
<p>As to the OP–I would say, see how things fall in place. It may be that the horse’s owner would rather not have him so far away. Maybe the college doesn’t have room, since you’re late to the process. So, it might not work out, through no fault or decision on your part. OTOH, it might. I would be preparing your D for the possibility that he might have to be returned.</p>
<p>I could go either way on this. Having the horse there could be a great stress reliever…or another stresser. He may prevent homesickness, or he may prevent new friendships from forming.</p>
<p>A horse AND a car freshman year? No way! I’d return the horse to its owner and let her ride the school’s horses, then reevaluate for sophomore year. This is way too much responsibility for the first year of college.</p>
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Really? I’m pretty sure attachment to horses/donkeys/mules/other large pack animals is a lot more common outside of the “first world” than inside. The phrase “first world problem” is hugely problematic. First of all, the term “first world” suggests a hierarchical structure. Besides that, when it was created it meant “capitalist” more than anything else. Besides that, divisions between the developed and developing (not that these terms are great) worlds are hardly distinct to the degree that the phrase would suggest they are. I know it’s a phrase used in jest and that most of those who use it haven’t the slightest malicious intent, but that doesn’t make it okay.</p>
<p>We have a similar issue. Our ultimate decision was to sublease the horse and it can come either second semester or, more likely, sophomore year depending on grades. Each kid is different and while the arguments for the horse were good (especially the stress relief) we really felt that her time with the team horses, while not exactly the same, was still enough to justify telling her she had to focus on the entire school experience. I have to disagree with the posters who compare owning a horse to having a passion for a musical instrument. If a kid is sick, or has a paper due the next day, or wants to take a day trip with a new group of friends, the instrument can be put aside or brought along with no adverse consequences. The horse has to be exercised and cared for no matter what.</p>
<p>DGD you nailed the reason why many dads-including this one-bear the cost of a horse—keeping our kid away from boys, cars, and parties.</p>
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From what I’ve seen, having the horse doesn’t stop the girls from finding new interests. Like I said, many of DD’s friends were huge horse enthusiasts, spending all their free time at the stable riding, bathing, and brushing horsey, until the first boyfriend came along and then the childhood horse craze was suddenly over.</p>
<p>With the circumstances the way you describe them, I would 100% allow my daughter to take the horse. You have said it is not problematic financially, it is important to your daughter, etc. The reality is if it is not working in 3 months, you can return the horse and she can move forward, but in three months, that horse will not be an option for her. I personally do not believe in closing doors before it’s time. And for the person that wrote:</p>
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<p>That is one the rudest thing I have read on CC. Not only was the information not helpful, you were completely bashing the OP for doing what she thinks is right is for HER child. I have never understood parents on this board who slam other parents for having the means to do extraordinary things.</p>