<p>SM74, spending hours at the stable is not a sure-fire way to distract your girls.</p>
<p>I agree with collegeshopping in #40.</p>
<p>Yes, I know that the musical instrument comparison is not perfect, but this horse would be at a barn where she would be fed and groomed and have her stall mucked out. The D would only have to ride her, and apparently she does not need hard exercise due to her age. </p>
<p>As I said, I’d be more worried about the car. </p>
<p>The OP has been through some difficulties with kids before, and if having something familiar with her would help her D, I don’t think it is unreasonable to consider trying it for at least a few months.</p>
<p>Interestingly, my husband BEGAN riding seriously when he realized that he would be one of very few boys among a ton of girls spending hours daily at the barn, and many show weekends away together. </p>
<p>He rode seriously through middle school, high school and college. And had, from what I’ve heard, a very satisfying dating life. :)</p>
<p>Wow, lots of responses. </p>
<p>It is certainly true that lots of girls stop riding horses once they reach the teenage years and all of the distractions. But in my limited experience, the girls that stick with it tend to be very kind and responsible, helpful and hardworking. (I’m not bragging about my daughter when I say this, but about the other girls from the barn, over a wide range of ages.) My daughter has had a part-time job for the last couple of years to help pay for some of her riding expenses and for her own personal spending, but we don’t plan for her to have a job during the college school year. </p>
<p>Someone asked if this request is last minute nervousness about leaving home, but I don’t think so. From the day my daughter started looking at colleges, the first question she had is if she could take her (former) horse with her, and I always pushed away the question saying that we would decide later but probably not. It is only because of the situation with the death of her horse that we find ourselves in this last-minute decision position.</p>
<p>I don’t consider it to be an option to delay bringing this horse to college for any length of time. Before the horse that we owned died, I had considered that. But in this case, with a leased horse, it doesn’t make any sense. It would be much more expensive to leave the horse at the current barn and pay someone to exercise her than it would be to send the horse to college, where the board is less expensive (because of the rural location of the LAC), and we couldn’t sub-lease without the owner’s permission. The two options are, 1) return the horse to the owner this month, or 2) extend the lease and take the horse to college. With the 2nd option, I have the ability to send the horse back to the owner at any time with a month’s notice. With the 1st option, we would lose this particular horse, but of course could always decide to lease a different horse at any time. </p>
<p>I don’t know how many girls on the team have brought their horses to college at this school, but at most of the schools we visited it was somewhere around 25%. I know that the girl who showed my daughter the barn when we had visited did have her own horse there. I’ve asked my daughter to talk to the coach and to the owner of the boarding facility to gather more information. It’s a bit awkward to have my daughter be the one who gathers information, since she is not neutral on the issue. I may be able to get more objective information if I was doing the communicating, but I think that is more important for my daughter to take on the responsibility herself.</p>
<p>You clearly have thought through the issue from all sides and you are also hitting the nail on the head with your statement about it being more important for your daughter to take on the responsibility of gathering the info. So, why not see how she handles that? If she does get lots of info supporting it (even if you suspect a slight bias - ha ha), doesn’t that help show how important this is to her? Conversely, if she drops the ball, maybe it’s too much responsibility? Sounds to me like you BOTH have good heads on your shoulders and will make a good decision. Best of luck!</p>
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<p>I agree completely. Let us know how it works out!</p>
<p>OP, what I sometimes do is ask my girls to make the first call, but ask the other party if Mom can follow up with some of her own questions. (Or indicate that Mom may.) In the horse world, it’s not unusual to deal with parents. After all, you are the one contracting and paying. Good luck. You sound reasonable.</p>
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<p>Really? I think it’s one of the funniest things I’ve read on CC. I’m still chuckling about it. A sense of humor definitely comes in handy when raising teenagers.</p>
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<p>Wish I’d thought of that… but then, I don’t really like horses. Last rode 30 years and a couple of marriages ago (exW#1 liked to ride) and if I never got on another horse, I’d be just fine.</p>
<p>Why is it that it’s almost always the girls that take up horses as a hobby and not the boys? Interesting social phenomenon…</p>
<p>You can lease a horse? Why not I guess. No, don’t bring it or you might end up owning it if anything happens. Maybe lease one at the school.</p>
<p>My kid is taking her horse(family member). IHSA for her school and many others means riding once or twice a week which is not a big commitment of time-with having your own horse it would probably be no more time than what they have done in high school. I think there is a lot of free time in college-unless youre an engineer. Certainly far less time commitment than ncaa athletes on campus.
My kid also wanted to do band but in the end didn’t feel it was possible to do both.</p>
<p>What is the availability for lessons on the leased horse? If she is new to jumping, she should not be out schooling over fences on her own. The owner should be the one asking some of these questions, but how far is the nearest equine hospital and will the boarding barn make arrangements for transport? Moving a horse is stressful and something like colic is always a possibility after a move or a change in food or exercise level. </p>
<p>Any girl who is truly “horse crazy” would never choose boys over horses. In my neck of the woods - Maryland’s horse country - it is very common for students to take horses with them. Many choose to focus on riding with the team and leave the horse behind too. It is such a personal decision.</p>
<p>It sounds as though the OP is leaning toward allowing the DD to take the horse to school since the other options have been considered and rejected for various reasons.</p>
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<p>LOL, that strategy sure didn’t work with my cousin who was both horse and boy crazy. She ended up spending a lot of nights sneaking out with the stable boys. My uncle was NOT happy with her choice of companions but since she went to a private girls school, those were the only boys she knew.</p>
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<p>Well in my family’s experience, that’s not a choice that had to be made. Determined girls can figure out how to combine their favorite activities ;).</p>
<p>PS. I also thought the footmen and lady-in-waiting comment was pretty funny too.</p>
<p>My D did not take her horse to college. It was not even a possibility for her last year because of where she decided to attend school. She needed a break from horses and riding after spending 13 years riding horses and competing at the highest junior levels for the last 4 years of her junior career. D loves horses, but was really burned out from the competition aspect of hunter/jumpers. She is still happy not riding for now, but knows that she can go back to horses at any point when she is ready. </p>
<p>I think this is a personal decision for the OP and her D. As long as her D can handle the responsibility with everything else in college it shouldn’t be a problem.</p>
<p>I can only wish we had the luxury of a valet, footman, coachman and lady-in-waiting at least once in a while. We did our own barn work, feeding, grooming, clipping, braiding, shipping, vetting (have spent many days soaking an abscessed foot 2-3 times/day, had a colic episode where I had to check on him every hour through the night and numerous other ailments over the years). We have to put hay in the barn usually on the hottest, most humid days of the year and we have to lug water in jugs if the water handle freezes in the winter. We could not go away as a family for even a day, no less a week unless I could round up reliable, knowledgeable help to take care of the barn while we were away. It is hardly glamorous. But it was a great environment for my kids to grow up in and they learned responsibility and hard work.</p>
<p>I totally understand the OP’s D’s situation as my D lost her heart horse on Christmas Eve 2011 due to a colic that would not resolve. It was a very tough time for her. She may choose to lease a horse in the future, but does not want to own one again and she had owned her own for almost 20 years. For now she takes care of the two boarder horses that we have here.</p>
<p>So not everyone involved with horses was born with the silver spoon.</p>
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<p>Again, it depends on the college and the team. Some colleges and majors (even other than engineering) are more rigorous and require more study and research time. Plus one should not underestimate the adjustment factor of that first semester freshman year. It can be a huge change from high school. And some teams require more from their members than others. The shows are on the weekends from September thru early December for the fall semester. Sometimes there are 2 shows in a weekend. They can be very time consuming depending on how far the team has to travel to get to the show. And most teams ask the members to be there all day to cheer on all members of their team. Many teams hold fundraising events in which you must participate. So there goes more “free time”. At my D’s university, all teams had to do community service as well. OP’s D needs to find out exactly what the situation will be at her school for that team.</p>
<p>Yeah, plenty of tales about cute stable boys. (Guess this depends on where and who’s running the place.)
All the horse committed gals I knew managed school and boys. Personally, I found the experience matured girls. It’s both a lot of responsibility and a big animal to manage. And a lot of fun and I still love the smell of barns and hay and all.</p>
<p>I also wondered how much she can actually compete, if she’s new to jumping.</p>
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<p>My reaction exactly… Lease a horse – i.e., actually pay someone else money – so that you can bathe it, brush it, feed it, and shovel endless piles of smelly horse-bleep just for the privilege of riding around in circles for an hour once a week? That would be like me leasing a car that I store in someone else’s garage, then drive over there once a week to wash it, wax it, vacuum it, and gas it up just so I can drive it around the block a few times, and then put it back in the garage until the next week when I do it all over again. Sorry, but I just don’t get it.</p>
<p>Leasing a horse is very common. Some are even “free leased” meaning you don’t pay an actual lease fee, but you pay for everything else related to the horse. I can tell you stories about horses leasing for $20K for a weekend! My D and her horse competed against a horse that cost $1 million. It’s an interesting world at the highest levels!</p>
<p>Yes, leasing is quite popular, especially for show ponies where kids outgrow them quickly. We leased a large pony for D when she outgrew her medium which she owned. You can get a very fancy show quality horse or pony for much less than it would cost to purchase that same animal. We could never have afforded to purchase a pony of the quality we leased. It was the only time D had a made, fancy animal to show. She had to put in a lot of work on the ones we bought (which actually made her a better rider) but even when they went their best, they would not win over the fanciest animals if they had similar rounds over fences.</p>
<p>We leased the pony from December through August. Of course, this just happened to be the pony who developed a skin issue that none of the vets could figure out. We even took her to an equine dermatologist (yes, they specialize too). No answer. The owners were nice enough to waive the monthly lease fee while we were incurring the vet fees. </p>
<p>Top show ponies and horses can have a price tag from 5 figures up to (and probably over now) the high six figures, so leasing is a way to avoid that.</p>
<p>I can say I learned something new today.</p>