<p>The handshake is an important skill. She should not hesitate, but smile, look the interviewer in the eye and extend her hand. Firm grasp for count of two, maintaining eye contact, and she's done.</p>
<p>This can be done right after she says, "Hi, I'm so and so." Or "Nice to meet you." Or, "Thank you for meeting with me .'</p>
<p>Too many women don't know how to do this.</p>
<ol>
<li><p>She should be herself, but her "best" self. In other words, she shouldn't try to be someone she's not, but she should remain aware of common courtesy's and politeness.</p></li>
<li><p>She should try to think of the interview as a two-way CONVERSATION with an interesting stranger, rather than some life or death evaluation of her.
By two-way conversation, I mean it is just as important to LISTEN and respond to the other person as it is to talk about yourself, and you will not be shot at dawn if you say something that you think sounded dumb. </p></li>
<li><p>She should dress comfortably and avoid anything that might make her fidget. There's nothing more distracting than trying to have a conversation with a young person who is tugging at a tie, twirling jewelry, or trying to pull down a skirt that is too short. </p></li>
<li><p>She should not only shake the interviewers hand when they meet, she should look the person in the eye, and SMILE.</p></li>
<li><p>It never hurts to have a few things in mind to say to break the ice -- something as simple as saying, wow it's cold today, isn't it? can help relieve nerves because it gives you a second to get comfortable and catch your bearings before the real interview starts. It also is the way you would start any conversation with a stranger. </p></li>
<li><p>If she has some nervous habits when she talks, such as saying "like" every five seconds or "Uhmmm" before she answers every question, point them out to her beforehand and tell her to try to be aware of them.</p></li>
<li><p>She should show some ENTHUSIASM when answering questions about herself, her interests or her activities. I am always amazed at how bored some kids sound when talking about themselves or their accomplishments. By the same token, however, kids who sound like they're bragging ("I am a real leader." "I am the best actress at my high school" "I have the highest grade point average of anyone in my class") are a bigger turn-off. Aim for somewhere in the middle.</p></li>
<li><p>She should know why she is applying to this particular school and why she and the school are good fits for each other. Again, showing some enthusiasm is good. If she is asked where else she is applying, (actually, interviewers are not supposed to ask this, but many alumni interviewers do), it is OK to just say, "I'm applying to a few other colleges/universities that are around the same size as Interview-School. I am really attracted to small/medium/large schools because..." If pushed, it is OK to name one or two names, but there is no need to recite the entire list. If she is asked about where the interview school ranks in her choices, she should say something along the lines of, "I applied because I can see myself attending if I am lucky enough to be admitted. Some of the things I particularly like about Interview-School are..." In other words, answer the question, but then direct the conversation back to more neutral territory.</p></li>
<li><p>She should not ask about her chances, nor should she ask the interviewer if they will write a good report about her. You wouldn't ask a stranger you've just met and had a nice conversation with if they like you. If an alumni interviewer indicates anything about her chances - positive or negative - or says that their positive report will get her in, she should take it with a HUGE grain of salt. Alumni interviewers are not going to be sitting in with the admissions committee when the decision is made. By the same token, any promises or suggestions of great financial aid or merit scholarships should be taken with a grain of salt because the alumni interviewer will not be the one reviewing the financial aid paperwork or making merit scholarship decisions.</p></li>
<li><p>She should be aware of the interviewer's body language, especially signs that the interview is drawing to a close.</p></li>
<li><p>She should shake hands again at the end, look the interviewer in the eye, SMILE, and say "thank you for your time. I've enjoyed talking with you." A written thank you as a follow up is also nice.</p></li>
</ol>
<p>Too many women don't know how to do this.>></p>
<p>Actually, Malfool, having extended my hand to many students of both sexes, I've had just as many limp handshakes from teenage BOYS have I had from teenage GIRLS. I think it is not a gender thing, as much as a generational one.</p>
<p>I'm sure you're right, Carolyn. I was thinking about the act of initiating a handshake, which is important for females in so many contexts. I hope I am wrong about that, too.</p>
<p>Another great thread, as my daughter will also be having an alumni interview this weekend (also at a Starbucks!) As she is interested in international relations, and the Iowa caucuses are happening, I bet the elections will come up. Thanks for the advice. She is very interested in this school and wants to make the best impression she can.</p>
<p>Carolyn - excellent suggestions!</p>
<p>I think you had mentioned that your daughter was shy - I think those kids need to understand there is a difference between enthusiasm and bragging. If she focuses on why she enjoyed things (NOT the "I") she can reassure herself that she isn't bragging.</p>
<p>By the way - I suggest you filter this thread - it would be overwhelming in its entirety. Sort of like perusing a magazine and finding 53 ways for a middle aged woman to look better before hitting the beach next week! Yikes!</p>