The IBANK Song!!: I wrote a song about Investment Banking (haha, bored)

Career Opportunities & Internships
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<p>Okay, so instead of giving career advice, I thought I'd mash together some things I know about Ibanking, consulting, jobs (blah), and give you guys a laugh (for once!).</p>

<p><a href="http://www.wolfyserver.net/ibank.html%5B/url%5D"&gt;http://www.wolfyserver.net/ibank.html&lt;/a> <- updated often! (with explicit lyrics! jk)</p>

<p>Lyrics: (this is the result of staying awake for 42+ hours)</p>

<p>"I Bank Life"</p>

<p>Municipal funds—aka munis. Mutual funds don’t go to pieces… P/E ratios, and pit traders...Ferragamo Laces
And Eddie Murphy got me switching places!!!</p>

<p>I can't believe them prices that got so low
Everybody holla Petronas oil, yo!!!</p>

<p>They make my day while I sail my ten yachts in the bay.. lalalalala... asset management, big 4, bulge bracket bonanzas, Wharton kids, Stern kids, Sloan boys, HBS kids.. rich kids, spoiled kids~~!! (they all got the answers!!)
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You bank, I bank, we all bank.... do do do... =)
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No rest, no sleep, one hundred twenty hour weeks!
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It's so fun to bank, actually no, it’s not fun to bank.
And I don’t want work commercial banks but be a slave for the ibank!
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Goldman, Lehman, UBS, Morgan Stanleys…
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Oh no! Look out for Bear!! (Stearns)
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Blackstone, BlackRock—Mergers and acquisitions!
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Oh, tis joy to handle legendary deals, back in the days of Pfizer and Pharmacia,
Did you know that Merrill Lynch just bought a big slice of pizza??? (*reference to acquisition of majority of Pizza Hut's shares)
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60 billion deals while eating sashimi with eel, McKinsey overachievers, consulting dis-believers!!</p>

<p>JPMorgan’s hoes, yo!</p>

<p>Commodities based on shiny rocks;
Lisa Endlich rocks my socks!!
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10Q, 10K, and old man SEC..
how I love to sell bonds back and charge unlawful amounts of moneyyyyy!!
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Analysts do the ***** work… lalala
Associates have no life… hahaha</p>

<p>Vice presidents take all the credit…!
Oh, to be a managing director and to have it all paid with debitttt
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Ohhh, why am I so sleepy and exhausted. I know why! Cause I be living the ibank life.</p>

<p><em>Now everybody in the club get the Fed tipsy</em></p>

<p>Hold up while I turn this contemporary
Let me put this in binary:</p>

<p>I'm a hedge fund P.I.M.P.</p>

<p>Graham-Leach-Bliley Act? **** THAT!!!</p>

<p>Glass-Steagall's caught me in a bad act.</p>

<p>Remember Arthur Anderson? Now's it's Accenture, *****..</p>

<p>I got them LBO's and CFO's and IPO's</p>

<p>I GOT THE MAGIC ****!!
s
the low down, I got Greenspan and his kids on the ground.</p>

<p>Can't buy my groceries until I get my CFA =(</p>

<p>And I'm too entrepreneurial to finish my MBA</p>

<p>SG, It's the Place to be!! Bank of America, you mean BANC of America jigga</p>

<p>Why deal with all this stress and strife? Cause,
I'm underwriting Life.</p>

<p>=) haha comeon with the flames.. heh</p>

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<p>I think you're on your way to a major record deal. You should get in contact with Clive Davis</p>

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<p>you should start singing this during your interview</p>

4

<p>Haha oh boy, this was just a random moment thing I just had to do.. took 10 minutes. But I think I might make it into a flash movie, and umm, show it to the Managing Director at GS? (Before he throws me out?)</p>