<p>My undergrad went coed a year or so before I started early 70’s). The school changed from having been a bit prissy in the past (men waited in the “parlors” for their dates) to co-ed dorms and bathrooms, with no policing of who occupied what. My roommate had her bf in bed with her more times than I would like to remember. Rather inconsiderate. They still had an old phone system when I started my freshman year. While some students had phones in their rooms, there was also a woman who sat at the desk in the lobby, answered the phone and transferred the calls to the upstairs halls. One of the women had a catalog in the desk from which she sold crotchless underwear!!! :eek:</p>
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<p>Now THAT’S hilarious! :D</p>
<p>I was at a women’s college from 1971-75. Sleepovers were extremely common, although for security reasons all visitors had to be met at the front desk. One person I knew actually had a BF–a grad student at another school–who lived with her for several years in her dorm room. At my school, almost everyone but freshmen had singles, so sexiling was not a problem for most. </p>
<p>I never heard of a couple having sex with the room mate in the room, though, and it would have been regarded as completely unacceptable behavior.</p>
<p>When did the Real Sexual Revolution happen?</p>
<p>It was September 1975, a keening wind remorselessly heralding the death of Summer; her neck sun-kissed to the color of honey, an aggressively languorous turn of the head, Marielle…</p>
<p>Errr, sorry. I digress. Return to your discussion.;)</p>
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I had a roommate one year (1975?) who was pretty out there in terms of behavior. Her bf occasionally slept over, but by agreement, I always gave them some private time before I showed up to get into my own bed, which happened to be the bottom bunk. It didn’t bother me to sleep in the same room with the guy, who was a friend of mine, as long as I wasn’t witness to anything.</p>
<p>One morning he left very quickly, and she apologized for disturbing me the night before. I didn’t remember a thing (I was a deep sleeper in those days), but apparently I said, in my sleep, “STOP SHAKING THE BED!” So bunk beds really ought to be a no-go for intimacy if your roommate is occupying one.</p>
<p>I liked the roommate, but realized I had to get out when I opened our fridge one day for a can of soda and found a surprising number of sugar cubes in it, which (I had to be told by someone else) contained LSD. Incompatible lifestyles, but she had a great sense of humor.</p>
<p><a href=“%22Wow,%20that%20was%20fast%22%20was%20one%20suggestion”>quote</a>
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Apologies for the digression, but this reminds me of a time I was watching “The Last Waltz” in a small Boston theater back in the 80s. When it got to Muddy Waters’ “Mannish Boy,” and he boomed out the lines,</p>
<p>“All you little girls, sitting there in a line,
I can make love to you all, in five minutes’ time.
Ain’t that a man?”</p>
<p>A woman sitting in front of me turned to her neighbor and said, “yup, that’s a man all right!”</p>
<p>“I went to a state school in the early 80’s. There were strict visiting hours for the opposite sex. Visitors had to leave their student ID at the front desk, and got it back when they left. If the ID’s weren’t picked up by midnight (10 on weekdays), they came looking for you.”</p>
<p>We visited Loyola MD with h.s. Jr last year & this is pretty much the policy there now. </p>
<p>When I went to college in fall 1970, I was sexiled regularly and it was a Cath girls’ college. I hated it, esp the part abt being expected to sleep in a chair in the lounge. </p>
<p>I like the Loyola policy because it protects the kids from the roommate’s abuse – if the school says “this way” and enforces it, the kid who does not like being sexiled does not have to be the one to complain. </p>
<p>Also, there are the security issues. Frankly I would think the potential for major lawsuits by parents of girls assaulted in bathrooms would have cleared the brains of the no-mo-loco-parentis administrators long ago.</p>
<p>Believe it or not, the statistics–way back when–showed the opposite. Girls were more likely to be raped by a stranger in an all female dorm. There was a rape of one of the women in my class when I was in college. Guy climbed up the fire escape and came in the window. He might not have tried it if the dorm was co-ed. </p>
<p>In co-ed by floor colleges, you’ll find guys almost always get the ground floor and the floor right below the roof.</p>
<p>My State U. still had visiting hours in the early 80’s (though some dorms were co-ed by floor–same rules applied).
There was a lot of visiting going on and it was uncool to tell on your roommate, so a lot of people put up with a lot of rude behavior. I only knew of one couple (truly outrageous behavior) who got kicked out of the dorm.
One roommate’s boyfriend lived with us (in small room–not suite) for an entire semester.
Actually they were very polite–they had my work/class schedule memorized and never had sex while I was there. It got to the point that I would just ask the guy to “turn around” if I was changing. . .
I had one roommate who had sex in the top bunk while I was “sleeping” in the bottom. . .</p>
<p>For me, the biggest “sexual revolution” has been in the way people talk about sex, and the way it is portrayed on TV/in movies in the last 10-15 years or so. The “f-bomb” is constant. People talk openly about sexual practices, mast<em>rbation, org</em>sms, etc. It is all so coarse, gross, crude. Whatever happened to romance? intimacy? discretion? good manners? There is nothing new under the sun–but in the old days, we didn’t talk about it in explicit detail in public. Surely this is a sign of the decline of civilization, IMO.</p>
<p>Soozievt, when I used the term “sleeping around”, I was referring to the casual hookups that seem fairly commonplace with todays teens. I have kids in college and high school right now and I have to tell you that the stories I hear about some kids sexual excapades makes me, well, I don’t even know the right word. Sad, concerned, shocked. I may be out in left field but I will never be ok with my daughter (or son for that matter) going to a party and then disappearing to the basement for a quickie or other things. What is worse, these high schoolers then talk about it as if they were discussing going to a movie! There seems to be no self respect. Like I said in my original post some, and I will emphasize the word some, wear it like a badge of courage. As for the behavior of some college kids who think it is perfectly ok to spend the night together, well I guess I have a real problem with intimate behavior in the presence or earshot of room mates. That is just disrespectful to them.<br>
I just hate the casualness that seems to permiate relationships today. No one fears STD’s, pregnancy, AIDS like they did back in my day. But back when I was in college, people namely girls, seemed to care about their reputations. Today, many kids are made to feel like something is wrong with them IF they aren’t engaging in these behaviors and kids are sexually active younger and younger today. I find it all kind of sad. And reading through this thread has made me realize just how conservative I really am. I am not apologizing for it though.</p>
<p>I really did not appreciate the inconsideration of my roommate, who would have her little scrawny boyfriend in and go at it without even saying a word to me. I was not even given the opportunity to fins alternative sleeping quarters and they’d just come in and go at it. Really rude. I finally asked them to go to his room for a change.</p>
<p>I got a single the next year and every year thereafter.</p>
<p>"My personal opinion is that if a kid is old enough to have sex, they’re old enough to take a hike to the local CVS and buy their own birth control. But that’s just me. "</p>
<p>I think the issue is whether they have the wisdom to take a hike to the local CVS. College students don’t always plan ahead.</p>
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<p>That’s one of those things that seems obvious now, doesn’t it?</p>
<p>Well, we live and learn. :D</p>
<p>I know when the sexual revolution started - exactly one year after I was there.</p>
<p>I attended a small all-male university from 1968 to 1972. My freshman year, no girls were permitted in the dorms. Period. Not even family members (except on move-in day). Sneaking in a girl was grounds for expulsion. My sophomore year, girls were permitted in the dorms (although there were restricted hours), but I was living in the fraternity house. In the fraternity house, girls were not permitted upstairs, but this was a university rule and perhaps not strictly followed. Nonetheless, girls (from the nearby - 45 miles away) all-female colleges could not spend the night because they were required to stay in “approved housing”, which was really little old ladies that made a few bucks on weekends renting rooms to these girls. The “approved housing” ladies, in turn, had required hours. My junior (and senior years) girls could stay overnight in the fraternity houses. However, I lived with 3 roommates in a house in the country. The sexual revolution must have happened over the summer between sophomore and junior years because now the girls did not have to stay in “approved housing” and for various reasons (mostly pertaining to sanitation and alcohol) our house would certainly not have qualified. </p>
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<p>I had to laugh about that one. Our first house had only three bedrooms, so we drew straws to determine which two guys had to share and which got the singles for the first semester. I had to share first semester. When my other two roommates had to share second semester, one of them solved the privacy problem with bunkbeds. Not your IKEA-type bunkbeds, but ones he made out of 2x4s and 4x4s because they were double-bed bunkbeds. That bed was so solid that no amount of non-verbal exercise on the top bunk would disturb the lower bunk. So it can be done.</p>
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Too funny!! LOL!!</p>
<p>I read that “womens liberation” and the “sexual revolution” were really just phases of an evil plot hatched by a team of psychology students in a fraternity at Dartmouth College in the mid 50’s. (Betty Freidan was an invention and Gloria Steinem was a paid employee.) It was all a plan designed so guys could get laid in college. One of the conspirators bet another that they could actually get women to burn their bras - he won $50. (It was a lot of money back then.)</p>
<p>Oh those silly Dartmouth boys. Guess it got pretty cold and lonely (before Dart went co-ed in 1972) up there in Hanover.</p>
<p>As I recall back in my day (the early 70s) there was a widely understood etiquette about sex and roommates: no sex while your roommate is in the room, but the roommate voluntarily carves out some time for the amorous couple to have the room alone for an hour or two. There’s always a study lounge or library available on a college campus, so an hour or two away from the room is not a major hardship. Beyond that, sleeping over was OK as long as there was no sex in the roommate’s presence. During exams or a high-stress period like just before a big paper is due, a little more deference was owed to the needs of the non-amorous roommate; but since presumably each member of the amorous couple had a roommate, there were two opportunities to try to work out an accommodation. (This obviously gets a little more complicated if the lover is visiting from out-of-town, but the timing and duration of those visits could be negotiated in advance). Everyone I knew followed those simple rules based on mutual consideration and common sense, and it generally worked out pretty well. In Ann Arbor the majority of upperclass students live in off-campus housing—houses and apartments—but in many cases students still shared a bedroom, so the same rules would apply. An exception would be couples in “committed” relationships who might choose to room together in off-campus housing, obviating the roommate conflict, but that was a pretty big step as it implied a commitment to being together for at least the academic year. I don’t see why these same rules wouldn’t work today: no rude behavior, no “sexiling” except of the voluntary sort, usually for no more than an hour or two at a time.</p>
<p>Liquor laws. Wisconsin, home to many Germans and others of European descent who brew beer and consume other “hard” liquors changed in my college years. The drinking age for beer was always 18 in post prohibition times and other alcohol 21 until my sophomore year in college (1972-1973) when the law changed to all alcohol at age 18. That changed the state border crossings into Wisconsin for drinking. Then sometime later the Federal government tied highway dollars to a drinking age of 21 and the law went to the current age 21 for everything. The UW Union used to serve something called “near bear” with a lower alcohol percentage at one time. The “beer bars” changed to offer all kinds of alcohol. Cities could write their own liquor sales laws- such as nothing sold until noon on Sundays- meaning a trip to the grocery store after church on Sunday to a grocery store in the right jurisdiction… Also some laws about grocery stores only allowed to sell liquor (all stores seemed to sell beer and maybe wine, only some were licensed for the hard stuff) until 9 pm- gated aisles to close that section in stores. It was an eye opener to discover state controlled liquor stores, none sold on Sundays, etc. And totally dry counties- especially where they distill whiskey!</p>
<p>Liqour was always prohibited at the football stadium. I remember many students having hidden soft flasks filled with rum and asking the aisle vendors, not for Coke, the brand sold, but for “mix” during games. Rum and Coke is a good drink… The student sections became more and more rowdy, regardless of how things were going on the field…</p>
<p>Visitation/coed housing. Our dorm visitation rules were from 9 am to 2 am I believe, meaning no members of the opposite sex on the floor from 2 am to 9 am- leaving plenty of time for doing whatever. I guess that meant no sleepovers, certainly no morning privacy in the halls when typical college students are finally using the down the hall bathrooms. The first two coed dorms appeared my sophomore year- by floor in a dorm on each area of campus. That kept being expanded until the only noncoed dorm was opened to males in 2006, finally allowing men to get into the dorm with the biggest rooms and centrally located. Food service since before my time always allowed anyone in any cafeteria- dorm residents get reduced rates on the a la carte pricing so any halls with food service right in the building meant mixed genders possible. Initially dorms were only locked at night, by now there is much greater security. Dorm bathrooms have been remodeled over the years, typically allowing coed floors by wing. Each dorm is divided into “houses”, some are a floor, others are two floors, or in some case an entire small building- every house is coed. There are just a few dorms without the central large bathrooms.</p>
<p>Back in the early 1970’s many students chose to live off campus- no rules there. Now many more/most post freshmen students choose off campus housing but now there are many newer apartment buildings adjacent to campus instead of those old converted houses farther away. With the privacy laws no parent can dictate health care purchases. Private apartments require a parental cosigner (to guarantee the rent is paid) but of course those parents have no rights as to who does what in the apt. Life in the dorms- son would never discuss that topic if asked!</p>
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<p>Holy crap, now I’m imagining campus security forcibly carting a mom away in handcuffs for trying to pick up her son for winter break. </p>
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<p>Cheeky guy, then! Of course, the bra-burning thing is just an urban legend, so he basically got 50 bucks for free.</p>