<p>I'm a little confused, depressed, and stressed out so I thought I'd come here for some help and advice. I'm fairly certain I have made the wrong choice in choosing a college. I know that it's only been half a semester and I could see myself staying here if I was forced to do it. But I'm pretty sure that I want to transfer for next year. The only problem is dealing with the feelings I have staying here. First, almost every day I think of the experiences I am missing by being stuck here. Second, it's hard to hear friends talk about how much of a great time college is for them and they are extremely happy with their decision. I was basically a fool in choosing a college. I did extremely well in high school and pretty much threw it all away by just going to a college with no research. I just hate the feeling that I'm here and wasting a year pretty much. I know the answer to all this is usually "don't think about any of that, look at what your present college has to offer, join clubs, meet people, have fun, relax." I've done all of these things and met some really nice people, but the atmosphere here is just not for me AT ALL and I'm stuck, just stuck.</p>
<p>I feel your pain (at times). You just have to make the best of any situation. I'm willing to bet you would've said similar things no matter what place you chose. Don't worry a lot of people have the same problem as you (me included) when it comes to finding the right people to hang out with, etc. First thing you need to do is accept your situation as suffering is part of human nature. We all experience from it and best of all we grow from it. Anyway, what do you feel like you are missing out on exactly and why? How many clubs have you really tried and how people have you really met? Perhaps you just need to keep trying and not give up so quick if you haven't really explored most of the options out there yet. What do you not like about the atmosphere?</p>
<p>Thanks for the reply...I don't know if you know much about Miami (OH) but it's VERY homogenous and cookie-cutter. On weekends, it's either drinking, going to one of two clubs around here in the country. The atmosphere is pretty much a college catalog look. For example, we have the brick buildings, the pillars, dances, costume parties/contests, movie nights, all of that stuff. The majority of people are from Ohio and there isn't much diversity (cultural, racial, political, etc). I just feel I would be much better suited for a city atmosphere.</p>
<p>I have met some good people and have been having a pretty good time. I just feel as if I'm missing opportunities and life experience. I worked extremely hard in high school and I did not capitalize on it. I am definitely going to try and make the best of it though. Your comment on life and suffering makes a ton of sense and I was probably going overboard in my first post. But yeah, I'm thinking that this place just isn't for me, I don't know...</p>
<p>So what is it about the city atmosphere that attracts you to it? Perhaps you can find certain elements of that where you are right now.</p>
<p>Just want to clarify too that when I say clubs, I don't mean just dance clubs but any type of club sponsored by the school.</p>
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I just feel as if I'm missing opportunities and life experience.
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<p>Be more specific. What kind of 'missing opportunities' are being missed in your eyes? What kind of 'life experience' is being missed by going to this college and not somewhere else? Just trying to get you to think hard about your situation and options for the situation.</p>
<p>Thanks by the way, it feels really good to talk about this and try to figure things out. The city atmosphere attracts me for a few reasons, the first being the amount of opportunities and the doors you can open at a great institution in an urban area. At Miami, it's difficult to find breakthroughs and most graduates end up staying in Ohio and live their lives around here. I don't want that. I refuse to be one of those who doesn't take all life can offer and stays where it's comfortable. I think risks, chances, and opportunities should be seized at times. Also, with many visits to the city, I feel it really makes you feel alive. The bustling surroundings really make you feel like you're in the middle of it all and it's just great in my opinion. Also, I've lived in the country for most of my life and I feel as if college should be a different experience than what you have had previously. It feels as if I'm home at this college and I believe that I should be experiencing new things and different surroundings. As for clubs, I have joined a few. I'm involved in Mock Trial, Bible Study, and am trying to get into some more. I've met some great people through them, but these clubs don't really change my feelings, they just seem to be a small break from the usual Miami. As for the missed opportunities and experiences, it's just like I mentioned before. I've lived in "Miami" all my life...country, homogenous, close-knit community...I just feel as if a change would be really good. Does that make sense or am I being stupid?</p>
<p>This is a great topic, because I feel the same way about my school. Except, most people are apathetic about the clubs and all people do on weekends is sit around and get drunk in someone's dorm or at a small house party. The "intellectualness" of the campus has much to be desired as well; I've yet to continue an in-class discussion out of class.</p>
<p>I emphasize with your frustration, and hope things work out for you, wherever you end up :)</p>
<p>omg.. i feel soooo sorry for you!!! Miami(OH) was my first choice school grades 9-11 until i actually hung out there. I really dont think that college in an urban area is all that great ... see uchicago... its basically about what environment (both social and cultural) the school has. If your willing to try out another small town school i would suggest ohio univ.-athens( ill probably be there next year!!!) although it isnt known as prestigous. The school and its students are both great and there out of state network is actually a lot more extensive than u would think. Also the school is working hard to become nationally recognized and is actually encountering great success in its efforts. If you havent ever visited athens i suggest that you check it out.</p>
<p>Well your feelings might be temporary but if you're sure you want out, I give you credit for recognizing there's a problem and for doing something about it.</p>
<p>From an academic standpoint it would be nice if you could stay for the year. If not perhaps you could come home and take classes at a nearby state or community college, or use the time to do something different and exciting, like a gap semester.</p>
<p>I saw some of your previous posts. NYC and NYU might be a match, but beware when you are unhappy one can tend to go too far in the opposite direction. If you're thinking NYU you better visit, it's as urban as you can get. I'd suggest other city schools...perhaps the city of Pittsburgh, with Carnegie Mellon and UPitt, both lively urban schools that you might like. Or some of the Boston or DC schools. One priority you should have for now is get the best grades you can.</p>
<p>screenname - thanks, same to you on dealing with your frustration...Miami seems to be full of house parties as well, nothing great. Also, I know what you mean about the discussing of intellectual ideas...no one really does that here either</p>
<p>terrybhs06 - haha, I'm glad someone knows how Miami is! I really didn't do my research, but I'm glad you did. My brother actually went to OU and so do some good friends of mine. I know a good amount about it. It is a great, laid-back school...also a HUGE party school. I'm not sure if it's what I'm personally looking for, but I think it's a great school for some people and if it came down to Miami or OU, I'd say go for OU. I guess it doesn't really come down to just urban or rural. I think I'm just looking for a high-rated school that will give me opportunities and a chance to experience something different as well. Thanks for understand though!</p>
<p>233 - I'm definitely going to stay here the whole year, I think I can handle that fine, it's just that it gets me down sometimes. I am trying to look at the positive though. I am definitely going to visit NYU first and hang out there for a few days to see how I like it. I also want to research on BU, Penn, Cornell, GWU...I don't know much about them or their specific locations but I really want to do my homework. And yeah, grades are definitely a high priority, I'm looking at around a 3.8 right now, but who knows. The one thing I've learned from college so far is that one grade can change everything.</p>
<p>i feel the exact same way at my school more than half of the time, with very few spurts of "i really think i can have a life here" until i realize that the people i tend to gravitate towards are graduating in either spring or december. i definately understand where you're coming from. i felt from the very first day walking onto my campus that this wasn't where i am supposed to be. the student body is mostly rich preppy kids who want to get drunk. no real value in academics even though they claim to have some value. and i hate talking to my friends from hs now because they're all having this fantastic time and i'm really not. i understand where you're coming from when you feel like you've "wasted a year" here. i feel the same way. but i'll tell you what my mom told me, nothing is permident and you can always leave/go home. i'm probably transfering in a year too. i think that some people push the "check out clubs/meet people/have fun/relax" because it worked for them but it doesn't necessarily work for all of us. some of us need something more. but if you're transferring, you should take the other posters' advice and get good grades. oh, and my school is pretty "cookie cutter" except we're actually in a city. clubs and drinking make this campus run :(</p>
<p>ok i started rambling but good luck with everything! i hope the next semester blows by fast for you so you can transfer to somewhere that makes you happy :)</p>
<p>If you feel the atmosphere of the school is not a good fit for you, work very hard academically, and start researching your transfer options. Check when transfer applications are due at the schools you are interested in. What is your situation in terms of financial need? This can make a huge difference, as merit aid / financial aid is often not as generous for transfer students.</p>
<p>good luck to you too tiburon! It's really hard, but hopefully it goes well for both for us. Where do you go if you don't mind me asking?</p>
<p>And my financial aid situation is that I probably couldn't afford 40,000 a year as most of the schools I'm looking at cost. So it will mean a good amount of student loans and some debt. I understand it's not good to have, but is it worth it in the end? It almost feels like it is...</p>
<p>i go to University of Tampa. cost here is expensive (almost 30,000 a year if you're on campus but its cheaper for me because i'm not) and they're kinda stingy with loans. i can't wait to become an official floridan resident, my tuition when i transfer is gonna be insanely cheap. :)</p>
<p>Well you have to remember that you could end up not liking any different place that you end up transferring to as well. Maybe it seems like the right place at first but you haven't really met the people from there or tried the different activities going on there yet so you can't come to the conclusion that certain places will be better for you. But if you really feel the need to transfer somewhere else then I guess it's the best course of action at this point. Just make sure you think through this clearly.</p>
<p>to the OP, you might want to consider Northwestern. We're only a half-hour or so train ride from downtown Chicago, but the campus still has the college feel to it (Evanston is a very nice suburb).</p>
<p>thanks adconard, but when do you know that you've thought about it enough? I feel as if I've searched the campus for what I want and I haven't found it and I feel as if opportunities are not here for me. What else do I need?</p>
<p>and I've heard good and bad things about Northwestern. Can you tell me a little more about your school? I'm actually going to be there for a couple nights in January so hopefully I get a good feel for the place. Thanks for the suggestion!</p>
<p>What things have you heard about NU, out of curiosity?</p>
<p>I'm only a freshman in my first quarter but I can tell you that the campus is beautiful, people are for the most part super smart and friendly, professors are great and there's lots to do - you'll <em>never</em> be bored.</p>
<p>I say don't transfer unless you have done your homework and know for sure about another campus or it could end up being the same thing and what would the point be.</p>